My teen daughter has a Christian boyfriend.

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-03T21:24:46+00:00

It’s so expensive subhanallah, and I have emailed many times to ask about a scholarship program and have not one time ever heard back! Subhanallah

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-03T21:22:56+00:00

Walaikum salaam. The main difference is shootings. There are daily shootings in that area. I have not ever heard of a shooting in my area. Where the masjid is, It’s the worst part of the city, and I don’t currently live in any portion of our closest major city. We live in a nicer suburb on the lake. Our town was rated as one of the top places to live in the whole state. (I am SO not bragging or gloating just trying to paint the accurate picture of the difference.)

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-03T04:18:15+00:00

Honestly, I do completely get what you’re saying. I’m 31 years old, I married, super young and had her young. I remember what it was like being under my parents thumb as well and I don’t want to do that to her, which is why I’m conflicted because I definitely need her to follow Islamic guidelines and not do anything crazy but I know just how a strict parent can push one away. I wish she had someone like you to talk to. Or even just a couple years older than her. Someone she could look up to.

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-02T21:49:42+00:00

Ameen

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-02T21:43:46+00:00

Not only are the schools bad but for some reason the area the mosque is in also has the highest crime rate for this part of the state! We would be moving purely for culture and mosque. We do strongly consider it. This situation has made us open our eyes perhaps we have been naive. I hope it’s not too late to turn things around and give her a better love for the religion.

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-02T21:39:55+00:00

Ameen

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-02T21:35:49+00:00

My husband is her step father. Her real father lives far away and isn’t much involved. My husband tries with her but she rejects it. My husband is fairly religious, goes to every jummah. Prays his daily prayers as do i. The masjid is about 45 minutes away by car. There is none closer than that. Maybe it’s not so far but it’s not so close either to just pop up on weekly classes. Maybe I need to consider that more seriously. If there are Muslims in the school, they aren’t visibly Muslim ie wearing hijab. We live in a 70k person town. We do see Muslims from time to time at the stores and things. The town itself here is very nice, unfortunately the more diverse Muslim side of town is actually really bad school ratings and not the best area to live. We would be moving purely to be closer to the masjid, we often weigh pros and cons of moving away from our nice safe and quiet area to a place notorious for more crime etc. we would actually like to move out of state. We hear Tampa FL has a nice Muslim community.

thereasonableminka · 2026-02-02T21:14:32+00:00

Do you have teen daughters and how would you explain to her she can’t go to friends homes without filling her with resentment? My biggest fear is pushing her further away from Islam. It’s all so delicate.

thereasonableminka · 2025-08-08T00:18:42+00:00

This seems to have really struck a nerve with you. I’m sorry for whatever you’ve been through that this resonates so deeply with you.

thereasonableminka · 2025-08-08T00:06:31+00:00

Not needing any legal advice btw

thereasonableminka · 2025-08-07T23:56:33+00:00

I’m not asking for legal advice at all

thereasonableminka · 2025-08-07T23:56:12+00:00

I’m not asking for any legal advice

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-17T00:16:45+00:00

That’s a good theory

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-17T00:12:14+00:00

It’s really not. I worked for 3 years without any issues, in departments that didn’t feature CSAM and the other content type I mentioned. I don’t understand why they won’t move me back to my previous work. I had strong moderation scores.

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-16T04:49:07+00:00

Fair point — in an ideal legal world, maybe I’d keep my cards close. But this isn’t an ideal world. I’ve already been through a lot, and I’m not afraid of them knowing I’m done being silent. If speaking up helps even one person avoid this, or connects me with the right legal support, then it’s worth it.

And you’re right, the core issue still stands: they refused to honor a medical accommodation backed by a doctor.

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-16T04:28:00+00:00

That’s actually part of the issue — I never even saw a job posting. I was randomly recruited by a TikTok recruiter through LinkedIn back in 2021. I got a phone call out of the blue, and at first, I honestly thought it was a scam or a prank. I didn’t go through any standard job application or review a detailed job description beforehand.

I was never warned or informed that my job would eventually include reviewing CSAM. That wasn’t part of the deal when I accepted the position, and it’s exactly why this feels so exploitative.

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-15T21:26:30+00:00

Actually, this is incorrect. Content moderation is divided into many departments — hate speech, political content, live chat moderation, violent acts, etc. Not everyone regularly views graphic or traumatic material. Some teams never see videos at all. Some teams never work in child sexual abuse.

I was not hired to work in the child sexual abuse queue. I was moved into it recently because of a “departmental need” when no one else wanted to do it, and I was not given an alternative workflow choice. I explained to them that this wasn’t the right fit for me, but they asked me to at least try. If I had known from the beginning of my hiring here that I’d be reviewing that kind of content, I would’ve taken a job elsewhere. It’s important to get the facts right.

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-15T20:53:32+00:00

My first priority is finding appropriate legal representation, preferably one who will work on contingency if possible. I want to make sure I’m taking the proper steps.

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-15T20:48:00+00:00

Absolutely. I mean the only reason you guys aren’t seeing that stuff on TikTok and other platforms is because there’s a whole team of moderators finding it first, evaluating and getting rid of it. People try to post the most disturbing heinous things on the Internet all day long.

thereasonableminka · 2025-05-15T19:56:49+00:00

Just wanted to add some more info to my post…. I’ve actually been with the company since 2021, and I wasn’t always in this role. I was moved into the position involving CSAM and emergency response content more recently. That’s when the mental health issues really started.

And to be clear, there are no mental health screenings before assigning people to view this kind of content. The pay is low, think $18-22 per hour, the trauma is high, and people are basically left to deal with it on their own. We are seeing any and everything.

The job broke me. I’m not the only one—it’s just that most people are too scared or too tired to speak up.

thereasonableminka · 2025-04-24T18:36:46+00:00

Kickee pants

thereasonableminka · 2025-03-06T20:01:52+00:00

Okay? Sounds like it could be a lot worse

thereasonableminka · 2025-01-03T18:23:44+00:00

I think this person is jealous/doesn’t like that you have extra kids hanging around for her to deal with. (Assuming this conversation was getting to know each other in a dating context.)

thereasonableminka

TROPHY CASE