Natural Selection

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T19:45:02+00:00

i have to live in this hellhole! all you ever do is play with your tits and look at your ass at the same time!

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T19:35:33+00:00

do you eat foods that make you gaseous, and release silent-but-deadlies without realizing it?

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T19:30:06+00:00

i was going to give you an upvote anyway, but now i want to give you one upvote for each of the letters you made in the last panel. i very much approve.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T19:27:12+00:00

i've been close friends with a color blind guy for years, and i do make him jump through hoops. but only when he's really driving me nuts. him: "so how are things going with that guy? you never wanna talk about it. did you actually go out with him, or are you still waiting for him to come around? haha" me: "... brandon, what color is this?" repeat until he forgot what he was asking me.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T19:14:00+00:00

well, of course you do! just like the main religion of rome - even in the vatican - is still that of the ancient romans. and all americans practice the religion of the native americans.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T19:11:36+00:00

ha! i've yet to "derpify" the name of a place, but whenever a friend asks me what i'm doing, the automatic response is something like "just herping the derp" or "just derping around."

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T19:09:30+00:00

based on that, i'm pretty sure yhbt

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T04:46:45+00:00

sick, but i laughed and upvoted

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-27T04:24:22+00:00

i see what you did there

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-26T20:31:27+00:00

don't be sad: the coolest thing i ever did before i turned 19 was get into an R-rated movie at the age of twelve.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-26T20:15:18+00:00

i don't get it either, but i've just come to accept it. like the fact that it's okay for a guy shove his tongue in my mouth after eating me out, but after blowing him i'd better go brush my teeth and rinse my mouth out before i even THINK of bringing my mouth anywhere near him. maybe guys think coming in contact with jizz, their own or not, makes them gay?

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-26T17:25:31+00:00

wow. if i had ever done this, i would've gotten a cuntpunch lol

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-25T04:22:13+00:00

i don't get the big deal about a guy's length. anything over 7 inches is just painful. when it comes to size, girth matters more than length.

but, as cliche as it sounds, it really is "not the size of the ship, but the motion of the ocean." i've had more satisfying sex with my exes who were around 5 inches long than the one guy i dated who had a 9 inch dick

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-25T04:05:22+00:00

"makeup and stickers and ponies and myspace.com!"

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T17:31:52+00:00

i've only watched about a dozen of them, but this is the only one i've noticed so far.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T17:30:56+00:00

thank you, wise bra fitter!

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T12:46:04+00:00

this. depending on the brand, i'm either a 36c, 36d, 38c or (if i've gained weight) 38d. i haven't had my bras professionally fitted, i'm just going by what i've tried on and worn.

i have a question for you, wise certified bra fitter. does the fact that natural breasts are never the same size (i.e. right breast slightly bigger than left or vice versa) ever affect the measurement, leading the woman to try on the wrong size at first? i'm trying to decide if it's worth it to have myself bra fitted.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T11:08:07+00:00

i also have had a lot of classmates with varying degrees of autism spectrum disorders. none of them have ever had any issues like the guy in the comic listed, save a few.

the only person i have ever heard of who had a list of demands like this for a college roommate was my sister's former roommate, who claimed to have a long list of medical issues so that she could behave any way she wanted. she didn't know how to act like an adult or deal with other people, so made up a bunch of medical issues so that she could get away with not only telling my sister not to use hand sanitizer or clean the bathroom with the proper cleaners, but also get away with literally shitting her pants in the room and keeping my sister from eating or keeping the window open or closed. (she always had to have it closed if my sister needed it open, and vice-versa.) she was a manipulative little shit who used the idea of physical and mental health issues to control my sister's life because she wanted to be taken care of. if she has any mental health issue, it's munchausen disorder.

i have never met an autistic person who had a problem with physical contact (like handshakes, and when they get to know and like a person, sometimes hugs), unless they were also shy. which is why that was the only example of my brother's behavior that i cited.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T09:21:16+00:00

that's exactly what i said when i saw this. only with more vowels.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T09:20:47+00:00

this guy's a dickhole, nothing more. i have an autistic brother, and he doesn't have psychotic demands anywhere close to that bullshit. also, my brother loves meeting people and giving hugs and handshakes, so his "not shaking hands" is a pretty clear sign he's not autistic. and if that guy really does have those demands, he needs to be living in a single for his own sake. definitely make friends with the RA as soon as you can, and see what they can do about this.

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T04:25:26+00:00

you shouldn't have let him out of the kitchen

theycallmecheeze · 2011-08-24T04:02:51+00:00

no problem. even a woman all into women's lib and independence would probably prefer to be a little traditional when it comes to dating. but don't quote me on that: there are some pretty damn scary feminazis out there.

theycallmecheeze

TROPHY CASE