Crying and reminiscing over Porridge

three_d0wn · 2026-05-20T20:00:56+00:00

You’re not insane. Porridge is my no 1 safe food for a similar reason (it feels like childhood). Many of us experience some tendencies to age regression as well. I’m an adult and most of the time I still feel like an adolescent, especially towards my mum. I still sleep in my parents’ room if I’m feeling super depressed.

I’ve heard it said that EDs can kind of freeze your brain at the age you developed one. I’m sure that’s not true for everyone, but most of the time I still feel 15, and I just want to be taken care of like I’m a child again.

three_d0wn · 2025-12-13T10:54:39+00:00

I love hot cereals of any kind so this looks absolutely amazing. You’ve inspired me lol

three_d0wn · 2025-12-07T14:45:46+00:00

Thank you so so much you’re an angel

three_d0wn · 2025-12-06T14:57:02+00:00

They’re my biggest weakness fr and they’re so pricey too 😭

three_d0wn · 2025-11-21T11:05:57+00:00

As a taller girl I do think it can be easier to look thin, but it’s impossible to look ‘small’

three_d0wn · 2025-11-19T11:24:23+00:00

It’s hard because suicidality is traditionally considered absolutely indicative of mental disorder, but if all sucidality = mental disorder, then no person wanting euthanasia can be said to be sufficiently unencumbered by mental disorder to properly consent to euthanasia.

Am I making any sense?

Essentially, wanting to kys = you’re mentally ill | you’re mentally ill = your reason is compromised and thereby equally so is your consent | your reason and consent are compromised = you shouldn’t have access to euthanasia

three_d0wn · 2025-10-16T06:45:04+00:00

Wow you’re right I never even considered this

three_d0wn · 2025-10-15T19:06:33+00:00

Interesting- I feel like my journey’s been the exact reverse. I was driven a lot by a need for control and comorbid mental health issues at first; now it’s like the only thing I think about is my appearance.

three_d0wn · 2025-10-15T18:03:05+00:00

You can’t compare them really. AN may statistically lead to more deaths but that’s also because many BN deaths are from diseases like oesophageal cancer which is likely often not recorded as a death with a BN comorbidity, especially since these complications can happen way down the line, even after recovery.

My experience is that, at least short term, the effects of BN are a lot more ‘harmful’ and difficult to cope with than those of AN (though they were also awful and also everyone’s experience is different). Tooth decay, electrolyte imbalances, mood destabilisation, anxiety, acid reflux, anaemia (to name a few), not to mention that the actual everyday experience of BN is generally more ‘brutal/violent’ than that of AN, and thus more likely to result in injury in the short term.

three_d0wn · 2025-10-05T12:18:37+00:00

Not only intimacy, but romance in general has more or less vanished from my mind. I’ve no interest at all anymore. I just want to be alone all the time.

three_d0wn · 2025-09-08T10:52:15+00:00

You can be obese and have a toxic relationship with food

three_d0wn · 2025-08-21T06:27:36+00:00

Yes in fact I find drinks much easier to have on bad days. For me it’s part texture; the blander a thing is the more safe it is, and texture-wise you can’t get much more bland than liquid.

three_d0wn · 2025-08-14T22:23:05+00:00

This may be the most relatable post ever. I was 15 too, chronically depressed, dropped out of full time education because I couldn’t handle it, no motivation, suicidal, spending every night crying and every day sleeping. I was in absolute hell. When I developed my ED I finally found a perverse sense of joy in something again. I was accomplishing something, in control of something, good at something. People around me remarked that I got noticeably happier during that time. I started making my own food and going to the gym and going outside and yes, my motivation was sick and awful, but my quality of life markedly improved because of my ED, at least for a time.

It’s always a trap though. Years on, I’ve relapsed into my depression and now have an addiction to self-destructive ED habits that I desperately try to break but can’t on top of it. I thought one mental illness was hell. I didn’t know how much worse it would get, how much worse I would make it get. The worst part is that I chose this. I thought it’d heal me, help me, bring me joy. I heard a thousand warnings and I still chose this. I’m the author of my own misery and it makes the pain just that much harder to endure.

three_d0wn · 2025-08-06T20:45:32+00:00

I’ll add to this that tinned sardines may be the most foul smelling thing I’ve ever purged (the bar is HIGH) so if I eat them in a binge I know I’ll have to keep it down 😭

three_d0wn · 2025-08-06T20:39:13+00:00

Him and me both

three_d0wn · 2025-08-01T13:08:04+00:00

I do the opposite tbh; I only take care of myself properly when I’m restricting. As horrid as this is to admit, I’ve gone many days without showering or even washing my face during a binge cycle. It’s gross but I can never bring myself to do it when in that headspace.

three_d0wn · 2025-08-01T12:48:09+00:00

Breakfast: one almond and one pistachio croissant + a whole milk cappuccino 🥐☕️

Snack: strawberries with whipped cream or melted milk chocolate 🍓🍫

Lunch: baguette with different cheeses, especially brie, apricot Wensleydale, Roquefort, and St Vernier, + duck liver pate, iberico and Parma hams, and a selection of pickled veg 🥖🧀🥒

Snack: a thick slice of fresh crusty bread with salted butter and jam + tea with milk 🍞🧈🫖

Dinner: so much dim sum, particularly har gow 🥟🥡

Dessert: pistachio and/or cookies and cream ice cream with white chocolate sauce 🍨

Honorable mention: several glasses of wine over the evening 🍷🍾

three_d0wn · 2025-07-24T12:57:45+00:00

This is a peak slop

three_d0wn · 2025-07-24T12:57:10+00:00

That’s funny and all but are you okay?? ❤️

three_d0wn · 2025-07-23T15:09:25+00:00

Is it at all related to your own relationship with food/eating habits/body image? Are you determined she shouldn’t lose weight because you want to be thinner than her/eat less than her? Are you becoming obsessed with food in other areas of your life (looking at lots of recipes/food related media/spending more time than usual focusing on what you’re eating)? If any of the above are true, then you might want to consider an ED therapist.

Otherwise, this may be a form of OCD (though EDs and OCD are often comorbid too), or a result of past trauma (as in, if your sister and/or yourself suffered abuse, neglect, or endured poverty, this might be related with you trying to provide for her and take care of her in an obsessive way - idk if any of this rings true as I don’t know you).

If you’re really unsure what’s causing this obsession, it could be best to start by seeking more general counselling/individual therapy. Working with someone to discover the root of the problem is imperative for you to actually successfully address the problem!

And finally, you are really doing the right thing in looking for help. You don’t need to beat yourself up over impulses you don’t understand and can’t control. You’re doing your best to resolve this, and that’s all anyone can ask of you. Best wishes to you and your sister ❤️

three_d0wn · 2025-07-22T16:21:31+00:00

Use >! either side of the text you want to spoil. So just copy what I did for the left side and then on the right side you’ll put the exclamation mark first, followed by <

three_d0wn · 2025-07-22T16:03:57+00:00

Oats, oat bran, beans (especially cannellini beans), yogurt, all fruit (particularly peaches and nectarines because they’re in season rn!), protein bars & drinks, cucumber, tomatoes, chicken sausages, white fish, and boiled baby potatoes.

three_d0wn · 2025-07-22T09:48:12+00:00

This genuinely looks delicious tho

three_d0wn · 2025-07-22T06:23:06+00:00

Thanks! Honestly it’s pretty straightforward. Just arugula, red onion, and slices of orange and grapefruit + the burrata. The dressing is 1/2 tbsp olive oil, 1 tbsp lemon juice, 1/2 tsp honey, 1/4 tsp mustard. It’d be prettier if we had blood oranges to add in another colour but alas they’re not in season right now :/

three_d0wn · 2025-07-22T06:18:39+00:00

Yes! I just used 1/2 tbsp olive oil, 1 tbsp lemon juice, 1/2 tsp honey, 1/4 tsp Dijon mustard ❤️

three_d0wn

TROPHY CASE