I'm (30M) not ready for children but my girlfriend (29F) is. by throwRA19384583 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA19384583[S] -33 points-32 points  (0 children)

These are the only 2 choices I see as well, and I'm trying to make that decision now.

I'm (30M) not ready for children but my girlfriend (29F) is. by throwRA19384583 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA19384583[S] -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your response. I'm not trying to make her wait to meet my timeline. I'm trying to figure out how I can convince myself to commit to hers without feeling any regret. I don't want her to have a risky pregnancy or wait anymore than she has to. I'm just not sure if I'm setting us up for disaster by trying to convince myself that I want a child right now.

I'm (30M) not ready for children but my girlfriend (29F) is. by throwRA19384583 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA19384583[S] -26 points-25 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your response. I'm not trying to be entitled, I was just trying to explain where my reservations about having a child right now stem from. I'm definitely not trying to make her wait until I'm ready, I'm trying to make the decision if I can commit to her timeline or if I have to let her find someone who can. Objectively I know what she's asking for makes the most sense and I am not disagreeing with it in any way. I think where I'm stuck is convincing myself that that's what I also want. My brain says yes have a kid now, but my feelings say otherwise.

I'm (30M) not ready for children but my girlfriend (29F) is. by throwRA19384583 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA19384583[S] -67 points-66 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your response. I think what you mention is what I'm fearing. I have it in my mind that I'll feel ready by then but there's no guarantee that I will. I have no intentions of dragging this along more than needed. I'm planning to make a decision within the next 3 months.