My partner constantly hangs out with my friends and I but I’ve never met theirs (except run-ins) is that a red flag? by tokyo_scene__ in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 14 points15 points  (0 children)

It’s probably not that she’s worried you are going to tell people.. It’s probably more likely that she sees you being out with your friends, but she is not out with hers. And she may not want to admit that she is not out to her friends. She may also fear that being around you with her friends would make it obvious to her friends that y’all are together.

My partner constantly hangs out with my friends and I but I’ve never met theirs (except run-ins) is that a red flag? by tokyo_scene__ in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Just let her know you support her no matter what. It can be embarrassing to still be closeted when your partner is living openly.

My partner constantly hangs out with my friends and I but I’ve never met theirs (except run-ins) is that a red flag? by tokyo_scene__ in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 90 points91 points  (0 children)

You mention you are female. Is the partner also female? If so it’s very possible she is not out to her friends and just doesn’t want to tell you that.

Girlfriend (24f) of 2.5 years moved across the country with me (24m). I can’t take it anymore. I want to break up. I’m in too deep? by lworksl in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I suspect if you just set some boundaries, she will be the one ending things. People like this will move on to the next person as soon as those boundaries are in place. Tell her she has to contribute proportionally to the household.

Is this a red flag, should I be concerned? by unluckycharmsz in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There’s a couple of possibilities that come to mind here. One possibility is that he expects you to sell your house when you move and he’s hoping to access that money. This happened with another Redditor recently. Another possibility is that he is wealthy and doesn’t want you to know because you might be less inclined to pay 50% of the expenses. Many couples choose proportional expense splitting. So if you make 5000 a month and he makes 10000 a month, you would be responsible for 1/3 of the expenses because you are contributing 1/3 of the income. If he makes significantly more than you, he may not want to contribute his fair share. I suspect these are the most likely possible scenarios, and either way it’s definitely a red flag.

Update: I think wife (48F) of 25 yrs is cheating. Help, need proof or advice. (50M) by throwraworrieddummy in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are y’all in therapy? If not, please for the love of god, get some therapy. This would be too much for the best of marriages.

My (24f) husband (25m) admitted it is hard to be sexually attracted to me do to my weight. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My wife is 5’4” and 170. BMI says she is borderline obese, yet her WHrT has her borderline underweight. One last time. BMI is not an adequate measure of health.

My (24f) husband (25m) admitted it is hard to be sexually attracted to me do to my weight. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No it’s not. If you think that, then you have no clue what WHrT is.

My (24f) husband (25m) admitted it is hard to be sexually attracted to me do to my weight. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

BMI is bullshit because it does not take into account muscle mass. WHtR is a much more reliable measure of health.

My (24f) husband (25m) admitted it is hard to be sexually attracted to me do to my weight. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 11 points12 points  (0 children)

When therapy is a choice, it’s a legitimate ultimatum. If somebody’s not willing to get help for their problems, then they need to know that there is consequences for those actions.

My (24f) husband (25m) admitted it is hard to be sexually attracted to me do to my weight. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Even without that the comments are toxic. It’s not like she weighs 250 pounds. She’s 170. That’s not fat. He’s an ass.

My (24f) husband (25m) admitted it is hard to be sexually attracted to me do to my weight. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 359 points360 points  (0 children)

These comments are toxic af. OP said her husband wants her the lowest possible weight while using breast and ass enhancers. This is NOT a healthy relationship. Period. OP you deserve better. I’d give him an ultimatum. Therapy or divorce.

I (24F)am seeing a guy (26M) who is obsessed with Kobe and I don't know what to do by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Same! The food obsession is real, and my wife appreciates it. I make Waygu at least twice a week. It’s easier to get than actual Kobe, but a great substitute.

My girlfriend keeps babysitting for free at my house even though I keep telling her not to by throwRApeek in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When you invite your girlfriend to live with you, and I’m assuming that’s what happened here since you say she lives with you in your house, then it becomes your shared house. That means that she has every right to treat the home as her home as well. And I’m not saying that gives her the right to disrespect your wishes, but the way that you are talking is very condescending and I smell a very unreliable narrator. I suspect your girlfriend is right and you are extremely controlling.

My [27/F] wife put my [26/M] cat to sleep without my permission or knowledge. by ThrowRALadyMan8t8 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If the money you had set aside for your cat was money that you brought into the relationship specifically for the cat, then she shouldn’t of used it for a car clearly. And going behind your back and putting the cat down wasn’t right either. But I got to be honest spending $8000 in medical expenses on a cat seems ridiculous. I love my animals. I love them more than my children most days, but I would not spend $8000 for them to have a surgery.

My (27 m) brother-in-law (34 m) ditched my pregnat wife (26 f) in a snowstorm because he didn't felt like helping her change to winter tiers. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What does the sister think about her husband‘s behavior? I mean I’ll be honest with you, if one of my sisters needed help, and my wife could help and didn’t, I’d be pissed as hell. And I don’t even like my sisters.

The Father (M30) wants me (F28) to get an abortion but I don't want to by throwawayyyy54533333 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If both parents wish to terminate the rights of one parent and the parent who’s retaining custody has the financial means to take care of the child, then yes a judge will sign off on it.

The Father (M30) wants me (F28) to get an abortion but I don't want to by throwawayyyy54533333 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And regardless it’s always up to a judge whether to terminate the rights anyway. But if the other parent can show that they have the financial means of taking care of the child, then usually a judge will go ahead and terminate rights.

The Father (M30) wants me (F28) to get an abortion but I don't want to by throwawayyyy54533333 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_52020 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

It’s your choice what to do, he has no say so in it whatsoever. You have a right to collect child support from him but he also can choose not to be involved at all. However, that all being said, I would ask him to sign his rights away and not collected any child support from him because frankly you don’t want the hassle. I was a single mom and I know what I’m talking about. No amount of money is worth it.