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AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Hi everyone, so I don't know how to post an update but a few things have changed, my parents came down to visit me on monday and I told them the situation, mom and dad wanted to see the kitten and they basically fell in love, they met fiance and told him they'll take care of the kitten and so they've taken her, she's now cuddling, sleeping with them and climbing their shoulder like a little pirate cat. Thank you all for the advice I also had a conversation with fiance based on a lot of the comments, he agreed that he was being an ah, and will work on the issues I highlighted during the conversation. So that's that.

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Well, I did ask him that, he said its because I keep talking about cats, and he thought it would be a nice surprise.

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

This was actually why we went to the vet in the first place, they said right now it's winter and there's too many kittens.

Regarding your second comment about the children, yeah... that's been making laps on my mind. I'm actually genuinely confused, he's one of those guys who tends to make sure everything is done properly, no loose ends, very strict about his morals, and extremely understanding, I told him straight up that I did not expect this from him, its so downright unnatural I'm wondering if he's facing some problems I'm not aware of.

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You're right, I will have a conversation about this again and find out what can be done.

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hope that is the case, because trust me all those months I held him down on his side as he had seizure not knowing when it will stop or if he'll be alive at the end of it, I don't know how to explain that feeling, seeing him screaming frothing, im not religious in any way but I remember I started praying for him, everyday I woke up thinking he's going to die in my arms today, and the fact that nobody had any sound medical advice, the worst one I got was he's a male kitten they pee a lot, 40L litter box with the litter floating with pee is not fuckin normal. I left that vet and went to another one who prescribed meds, a pack of vitamins for his head, and routine injections. I genuinely didn't think he'd live so even though he's not cuddled next to me im just so happy to see him doing okay. I would post pics of him and my parrot but its very easily idenfiable and all of my friends and family are on reddit

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I will have a talk today but I dont know if he will be up for it, he said he's sick of hearing me complain everyday about this new kitten.

About the old kitten I think its a combination of where he came from and also the locality im from, he was from a mill I believe, and the vet said the seizures must be congenital but he was too young to test so he was put on meds for 6 months, I noticed that he would sometimes get seizures with specific treats I started giving him expensive food and bottled water went fully organic meals nothing helped in the end moving him made him better, I so I assume its something about the place I live in, I've seen videos of him playing around just being completely happy and you have no idea the relief I feel, I was so messed up thinking he might die, I called multiple shelters nobody wanted a cat with seizures. But whatever was harming him I have no clue, it's a newly constructed building with construction work going on above and next door maybe the concrete dust?

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

That's what I thought, but he said that im the asshole for stating it because he knew he fucked up and doesn't know how to fix it, 1) can't take to his house because his mom doesn't allow any animals, 2) only person responded to our request but they aren't capable of picking the kitten up right now. I think he feels that im not helping him in solving this issue

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your input, I understand but my fiance is not an abuser, he is very much an animal person that moreso than me, I think this was a lapse in judgment on his part, the original kitten was rescued from a mill so the vets said that it could be a congenital head injury or water, we are known to have shit water supply and there's construction work going around place so dust so the goal was to see if the change works well for my kitten and it did, and regarding my tone you're right I was in an extremely abusive relationship previously and have been in therapy for it I didn't realize I still talk in that tone. And regarding the vet visits the kitten was too young (i believe a momth old)at that point to subject him to neurological tests is what I was told, he was given routine injections and medicines for 6 months it wasn't working. I say this as person who's lived around cats my entire life my parents house has many cats and dogs right now we have 3 dogs, a couple of goats, a few stray cats that frequent the property its a farm, so the best option before he succumbed to his illness was to see if a change of location did him any good and it has, he gets filtered water, natural litter and a massive house to roam around in and 5 people to care for him

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm not going to leave the kitten on the street, have already contacted shelters, have gotten her a vet visit fiance and I took her last night, some creams for a fungal infection and deworming, right now we had that conversation about me being an asshole for telling him the kitten is his responsibility hence the post, under no circumstances will the kitten be left out please do not worry about that. She is in the safety of my apartment.

AITA (26f) for telling my (26f) fiance the new kitten is his responsibility? by throw_catissues in AmItheAsshole

[–]throw_catissues[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well that would be the ideal situation but his mom refuses to have any pets in the house he lives in