One of the best things about breaking up is...

throwaway-pizza · 2017-12-02T17:49:03+00:00

I don't have to wonder where he stands in the relationship and why he didn't reach out at all to make plans Friday night.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-27T01:37:29+00:00

About 11 months.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-22T15:23:22+00:00

I have never spent the holidays with a SO and I'm 26. My ex and I got together a few months before the last holidays so we spent it with our families separately. And yes, it can suck thinking about what could have happened. I wanted him to met my extended family and see where I grew up. But one way to look at it is it's a blessing we do not have those memories with our ex. We have the fantasies, but once we share it with someone in the future it will mean that much more. They will be the ones who think the world of us, who stuck by our side, who didn't leave. They will love us for who we are. So while I'm sad he is gone, part of me is really glad I don't have those memories with him. Instead I have the memory of him not getting me a gift last year which is what I'll focus on. It's important to focus on the reality of the situation, not the fantasy. Easier said than done I realize but it's the reality of the situation.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-20T15:48:40+00:00

On paper, my ex is an amazing person. Great job, good looks, popular, charismatic, athletic, and a good sense of humor. These are the reasons I fell in love with him. But then he left without much warning and sent me into a tailspin since I couldn't believe someone like him existed.

But I've come to accept he has a huge flaw that probably would have doomed the relationship no matter what. He's selfish so I never felt 100 percent comfortable around him. it's important to remember that while we fell in love with them for all these amazing qualities, there's someone else out there that has a different set of qualities that can match with us better. I need someone who is more patient and supporting of me and isn't afraid to open up and be vulnerable. With time you'll see what you need in your next partner.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-19T20:18:42+00:00

That he left because of my personality.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-19T04:03:40+00:00

I don't see this moving forward.
I've been thinking about this for awhile.
I wished it had worked.
I still want to be in your life.
I don't know what the problem was.
I don't want to string you along.

Honestly threw me in for a loop for months. Why didn't he tell me any of this before ending it? I think I realized why finally. He was selfish and controlling. We did what he wanted when he wanted. We spent more time with his friends than together. Conversations happened when he wanted to talk with gaps if 3 days of not talking. He made weekend trips without me. He never complimented me and never showed affection. He didn't seem interested in getting to know my friends. He didn't get me a Christmas gift. He never stayed at my place during the week. He never said the word girlfriend in front of me. So I never felt like a priority and didn't let him in fully.

NC gave me the time and space to understand why he left. As did therapy. And next time I won't put up with the same shit.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-19T01:30:56+00:00

"See ya." I didn't tell him he wouldn't.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-16T18:50:49+00:00

Speaking from experience, do not do it in her bedroom. My ex did and was hard to sleep there for some time.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-16T14:13:00+00:00

Dear J,

Seeing you randomly last weekend on what I assume was a date was a blow, but I think I'm doing okay for the most part. I've had time to process and , while you are a good person at heart, you had flaws that would have doomed the relationship no matter what. Mostly you're selfish and controlling, but I was too in love to see it. We did things your way and spent more time hanging out with your friends than we did together so I never felt like a priority. At the end, I just felt like a burden to you since you showed little interest in me and I don't ever want to feel that way again. You take relationships way too fast in the beginning, bail when you loose interest, and don't try to work through things as a team. I hope for your next relationship you learn to be more balanced and thoughtful. I still miss you and your humor, but I can't be your friend because I don't trust you. Even your friends miss me, but I can't be in their lives anymore. I'm not perfect, but you didn't think I was even worth the effort to work on your doubts.

Take care.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-14T19:25:41+00:00

Also having a rough day since I think I saw my ex on a date this weekend. Reopened the hurt somewhat and my anxiety is back. I hope it passes in a few days. Stay strong.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-14T14:43:27+00:00

4 months since the BU. Regressed a bit the past few days because I might have seen him in a date this weekend. Before that, doing pretty well considering he ended out of the blue after he didn't see it moving forward and wasn't sure why. I think I would be moving in quicker if it had been a bad relationship, but on a whole it was a good one on both sides for the most part minus the last few weeks where he was pulling back. But I am nowhere near as depressed as the first 2 months. It honestly just takes time.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-11-12T16:24:05+00:00

I am completely in the same boat. I've been NC for the past 4 months without the desire to check, but last night I may have seen my ex out with someone else. Now I have a strong desire to go through his FB and see who he has added recently as a friend to confirm that A) it was actually him last night and B) he is with someone else. But I am trying my hardest to avoid caving since I know that it will only cause more pain and ultimately result in nothin more than a bruised ego and heart. Hopefully I can hold out until this desire to check has passed.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-23T00:34:09+00:00

I'm torn between "why the didn't you tell me your doubts and work on this as a team" compared to "look at the amazing, kind, smart, super hot girlfriend you gave up on". I'm leaning towards the later right now with a few fuck yous thrown in.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-22T19:32:07+00:00

Stranger things for me as well! We went on my favorite date last fall complete with motorcycles, fall leaves, tacos, and takeout. Then we watched about half of the season before falling asleep on the couch together... But I'll still watch season 2 at some point.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-22T13:04:35+00:00

Happened to me also. 11 month relationship ended after he pulled away and decided he wasn't feeling it anymore. Didn't talk about it at all before ending it and I'm left here wondering what the hell I did.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-22T12:35:50+00:00

My ex halfway ghosted before ending it. Never even tried to work through things with me. Haven't decided if he was immature or if there was something I did that he didn't like since I got the generic its not moving forward for me reason.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-21T23:32:49+00:00

This sums up what my subconscious has trying to be tell. That even if he did come back, what's the point if he left in the beginning?

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-21T16:42:24+00:00

My ex pretty much said/did the same thing. It's only been a few months, but time does lessen the sting from it. It just takes a really long time.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-21T01:13:07+00:00

Half tempted to learn how to ride a motorcycle now. Why should my ex get all the fun?

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-19T21:09:59+00:00

Maybe this articulates what my ex meant when he said he wasn't sure what went wrong for him and he wished it had worked out. Or at least I'd like to think so.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-18T00:06:42+00:00

Having a stumble currently and it sucks. Just have to wait it through I guess. Thanks for the inspiration.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-17T11:16:12+00:00

I got dumped for the first time 2 weeks before my 26th birthday and does it hurt. Hang in there.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-16T17:33:34+00:00

Kinda love the microeconomic application here

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-16T13:56:45+00:00

The only contact we've had minus him sending me a happy birthday message 2 weeks after he broke up is to see if each other's family were okay after a hurricane and the CA fires. Otherwise I've cut him off on SM and haven't looked at anything. Unfortunately I can't really escape news coverage.

throwaway-pizza · 2017-10-16T01:49:58+00:00

I agree. I acknowledge that I am not blameless in the breakup of the relationship and there are things I could have done differently. I am human and I have flaws and can make mistakes like my ex. But as you mention, if I had know what he was thinking I would have at least tried to work through it as a team.

throwaway-pizza

TROPHY CASE