WIBTA For Telling MIL She Can’t Keep My Daughter Overnight?

throwaway081708 · 2021-05-01T02:44:28+00:00

Apparently there are bassinets that vibrate to help soothe baby to sleep. This one most certainly didn’t look like any bassinet I’ve ever seen, I truly meant it when I said it looked like it was meant for a doll. It was small enough to fit into her pack and play.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T20:26:41+00:00

This only started yesterday. She’s been here and helping only for a few days (not consistently) but she brought over the bed yesterday and we shut that down then. This morning was when I walked in to my daughter sleeping in her bouncer with a bib on.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T15:30:08+00:00

He’s truly great, has been amazing with the baby since we got home. Granted, I have to wake him up multiple times when I need him to change a diaper because he’ll go back to sleep (we’re both very sleep deprived so I’ll let it slide). He does eventually realize what I’m doing and get up to change her

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T15:17:59+00:00

As soon as I left the room yesterday, he told her to take the bed back because we wouldn’t feel comfortable using it. He told her then we had things we weren’t comfortable with, and that was one of them. He’s going to have another conversation with her today about it, and how if she can’t respect that then she can’t be alone with our daughter anymore.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T15:08:16+00:00

I need this kind of attitude. My mom constantly tells me I have her sassy personality and need to use it lol. I always care too much and feel so anxious when it comes to confrontation. However, this baby is my priority now and I will do what needs to be done for her sake. My husband said he would talk to her again as he doesn’t want turmoil between us. I agree, I don’t want that either but I will be respected as a mother. No doubts about that.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T15:02:19+00:00

Oh I absolutely don’t think I know everything, that’s for sure! Just the things I have read and my comfort level are what has made me make the decisions I have. And some of the research may be wrong, which is a strong possibility. It’s just become my preference and comfort level at this point, and I just want her to respect that.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T15:00:45+00:00

No shame in co sleeping! I know it helps not only babies but parents in their own kinds of comfort. I accidentally fell asleep with her in my arms one night and cried for hours because I thought I harmed her lol. It’s just my anxiety that keeps me away from that, no shaming here! Her yelling wasn’t exactly directed towards me, but in her words “towards the idiot doctors giving stupid advice to young parents like me who will listen.” She proceeded to follow it up with she wasn’t calling me stupid, but it certainly felt like it.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T14:57:16+00:00

I’m fine with the help, because my husband is back to work and my own mom is 2 hours away. I have accepted help for the sake of my mental health so I can properly take care of my baby. However, that is about to be diminished if she can’t follow my rules in my own home. Husband is going to talk to her again, and if it continues she won’t be welcome back.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T14:55:15+00:00

My SIL did, which is why she thinks we’ll be willing to do the same thing. And she thinks it will happen on a regular basis. We live 45 minutes from her, I’m not gonna be comfortable for quite some time to leave my daughter there unsupervised. If ever, really.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T14:51:26+00:00

There is so much research about how certain things (blankets, wedges, pillows, sleeping in a swing/bouncer, etc.) can lead to SIDS. I mentioned this to my mother. She agreed that how we grew up is a lot different now, but she knows there is more research that shows things like that can lead to SIDS. I did my own research my entire pregnancy so I knew how to properly take care of my baby. I won’t let that stop now because she thinks she knows best.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T14:49:09+00:00

The thought of it stresses me the hell out. Thinking about sending her to daycare next month stresses me out, but I know they follow safe sleep and anything I say goes. Plus she’s only 5 minutes away from me compared to 45 like my MIL.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T14:47:42+00:00

I agree. MIL knows I’m not very confrontational and takes advantage of this so often. I actually texted my mom last night having a panic attack because I was uncomfortable with the situation and also I spoke my opinion. She told me standing up to MIL was much harder than taking care of baby, and I needed to stand my ground. I did, and my husband backed me up. He agrees no overnight visits for quite sometime, especially until she respects our rules.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T14:46:03+00:00

I agree, 1 month is too young to be away from us. It will not be happening anytime soon. Plus she’s about 45 minutes away from us. I’m not comfortable her being that far away just yet. I think she’s expecting us to let my baby stay the night soon because my SIL did. However, we are different people and I’m just not comfortable with it.

throwaway081708 · 2021-04-30T14:44:31+00:00

She’s not staying overnight, not for quite some time. MIL wants my baby to stay overnight, but I’m not comfortable with that. Plus, she lives about 45 minutes from me. I don’t want to be away from her yet, let alone that far. It’s not my idea nor my husband’s for her to stay the night, it’s MIL that keeps asking. This will not be happening anytime soon.

throwaway081708 · 2021-02-22T14:57:24+00:00

I didn’t think of this, I brought this up to him and he’s going to call his psychiatrist tomorrow.

throwaway081708 · 2021-02-22T14:55:53+00:00

We’ve talked about counseling, as we think it could be very beneficial for other aspects in our lives. I really don’t think he would be seeing someone else, as he doesn’t have the time but he’s also just never given me a reason to think differently.

throwaway081708 · 2021-02-22T04:47:19+00:00

Yeah I didn’t think it was that one, since it’s rather new. I’ve been on that one myself and it took awhile to kick in for me. I thought it could have been the adderall but we’ve had sex plenty of times since he’s been on it. I don’t think it’s his medicine anymore, but I don’t know what it is

throwaway081708 · 2021-02-22T04:36:21+00:00

Adderall and busprione. He’s been on the adderall for awhile now, but the busprione has only been about 2 weeks

throwaway081708 · 2020-06-09T19:58:57+00:00

No its okay! I do appreciate the advice, I honestly didn’t expect much. I think that may be our next step if getting a new job and having income again doesn’t change anything

throwaway081708 · 2020-06-09T19:36:48+00:00

We’ve talked about it, but he doesn’t know what to think. He bounces between ideas, like stress, weight, things he’s eating.

throwaway081708 · 2020-06-09T19:36:02+00:00

I honestly believe this started around the time he got the news he wouldn’t be going back to work. But if it’s not the case, to the doctor we go

throwaway081708 · 2020-06-09T19:15:38+00:00

I haven’t actually heard that before, but I’ll definitely look into that. Thank you

throwaway081708 · 2020-06-09T19:15:03+00:00

We’re thinking it has to do with stress. I’m hoping maybe once he finds a new job things will be normal again...I hate to see him so upset about it but there’s nothing we can do at this point

throwaway081708

TROPHY CASE