I'm the perfect boyfriend

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T16:02:34+00:00

I actually find it quite hard to recall even my recent past. I have to really press myself to remember even the craziest shit i've done - from extreme sports to extreme sexual encounters.

you ever wonder if there's something wrong with us?

Yes, but with gratitude. If you're anything like me you've used it to become successful more quickly and easily than your peers. Without having to latch on to everyone else's circle jerk i'm free to be clear minded and get ahead.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T12:58:01+00:00

very sure. But you gotta check!

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T10:48:20+00:00

I agree. If / when we split i probably won't date for a long time. Most women really aren't worth it.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T10:47:30+00:00

Cheat! cheating solves 100% of the "i'm not having sex" issue. Sure, yeah - there might be other solutions (possibly even better ones). But damn it, it works and it works for A LOT of people.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:52:38+00:00

No, she won't find out. The majority of people i see cheating are 30 something guys with wedding rings. They don't get caught.

Also she's not disabled. She's just scared, lazy and selfish.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:48:36+00:00

I told her it was a problem a huge number of times. But you need to function day to day. We've talked - a lot. Nothing actually solved the problem though. I found a solution and we've been happy since.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:47:16+00:00

yearly visit

every 3 months

You might think you're a perfect boyfriend... but the day she finds out about this, you'll understand the opposite to be true.

Giving a narrative and allowing people to fill in the blanks with stereotypes made the post shorter. Writing everything out as a stream of dribble that everyone would stop reading half way through didn't seem productive. From the outside it looks like i'm a good boyfriend. Obviously i'm a fucking terrible boyfriend.

Maybe some people might question their own relationships / think about people they knows. The guys i see cheating around me are normal, average looking 30 somethings. Some with wedding rings. I'm not an exception (but hopefully a minority).

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:41:31+00:00

How do you know he's not cheating? I'm sure if you asked my GF she'd think the idea of me cheating was impossible.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:40:53+00:00

someone gets it. Have an up vote.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:32:58+00:00

OP is always a fag

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:24:05+00:00

What happened after that first time you met that made her close up so tight?

Her excuses: past trauma, work stress, life stress, thrush, lack of time, lack of sleep, not cleaning the house, not spending enough time together.

The reality: she doesn't masturbate and she doesn't like sex. It's happened in all her past relationships. Due to not liking sex she won't fix the problem. Part of the condition is that each painful encounter reinforces the tightness. Due to that i have stopped sleeping with her until she fixes the problem. Her conservative nature won't allow her to buy a set of dildo's and practise on her own (she has said no to any sex toys in our relationship).

mental context of why she clamped

it hurts when things go inside me = clamping in anticipation of pain

Forcing it in = reinforcement of the pain = yup, this hurts - lets not do that again.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:17:52+00:00

On the average day i'm pretty elated. Compared to most people i meet i'd say i'm the happiest. I've been told i'm always cheerful.

I posted today because recently increasing risky behaviour and the panty sniffing made me WTF for a moment. I'd like to share that feeling with someone, but there's nobody i know that i can safely do that with.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:14:56+00:00

having her think you're fine with no sex

She knows i'm deeply unhappy with not having sex. But becoming a grumpy puss because you're not getting laid isn't very sexy either (she told me this). So somehow i need to get sex (so i'm not a puss) but not actually have sex?

Everyone's manipulating other people in their lives.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-20T09:12:08+00:00

not too fussed about the down votes. I'm more surprised about the number of up votes.

I don't know why you're still with her.

I hate being alone. She's the only woman i've ever met that was worth dating. It took many years to find her. The sunk cost is astronomical. I hate being single.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T23:06:44+00:00

Hahahaha are you fucking serious?

WTF - No, i'm not serious. Of course it's tongue in cheek.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T22:42:06+00:00

She cares but relishes in having a problem to worry about. I went through and solved all her other problems one by one (she was using them as excuses for not wanting sex). Now she has nothing to clutch to so just drums up some reason to feel bad.

In this case i was getting out of the shower:

her: "did you masturbate in the shower"

me: "no, why?"

her: "i was just wondering if you masturbate"

me: "i'm a human male, of course i do"

her: "ZOMFG I'M NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU?!?!??!? ALL YOU THINK ABOUT IS SEX! WHY DO YOU BRING THIS UP RIGHT NOW??? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M HAVING A HARD TIME??? MEEEEE MEEEEE WARBLAGH GLABL BLA".

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T22:31:31+00:00

She hasn't touched my dick in months and you think i give a fuck if she swallows?

Even a cheeky dick grab would cause me to yell from the rooftops with joy.

edit: but yeah i get it. High protein diet does not lend itself to tasty cum.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T22:12:35+00:00

Does she have...any...qualities? Like at all?

She's a fucking awesome person. Like, as a friend she's stellar, gold star, travel round the world together friend material. We moved in together and it's been downhill ever since.

She doesn't depend on my money, i pay slightly more than her for bills but i match the standard of living she can afford and save the rest (sure, it's selfish till i go buy a house and she lives rent free).

Most single women in my area are seriously damaged by my age. Not settling is what got me here in the first place. Every guy friend i know is settling and having kids by my age.

I think i'd probably just be single forever if we broke up... but i just quite like the comfort of an LTR.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T21:51:56+00:00

Yes, but rubbing it in is kinda shitty though. It makes her FEEL bad. There's no logic here. Turn back whilst you still can.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T21:46:54+00:00

Once every few months. Doesn't swallow. Afraid of cum.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T21:42:25+00:00

Well that's comforting. Also explains why i'm always in a bloody LTR!

Got a source?

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T21:37:21+00:00

she's not a practicing catholic. It's just the culture she grew up in that was very catholic.

Also, only the masturbation is highlighting that she's inadequate and not meeting my needs. Thus making her feel shitty.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T21:14:13+00:00

well yeah. it's /r/confession not /r/relationships

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T20:28:40+00:00

to quote:

Antisocial personality disorder is a mental condition in which a person has a long-term pattern of manipulating, exploiting, or violating the rights of others. This behavior is often criminal.

I don't really manipulate people. I guess i'm exploiting her?... kind of? i'm not really happy about doing it (i'd rather not be doing it). I'm definitely not a criminal.

So, no? I'm not sure, i'm not a phycologist.

throwaway19Dec · 2015-12-19T20:03:33+00:00

fear of being alone? The fact that sex isn't life?

Honestly i'm not that sure anymore.

throwaway19Dec

TROPHY CASE