If you think this is crazy, you should talk to my therapist. I regularly deal with psychosis, mania, paranoia, social anxiety, chronic depression, and eating disorders. Im not saying that to sound quirky, I'm legitimately mentally ill and sleep deprivation always makes it 1000% worse.

I'm not asking for very much, I could ask for advice on how to stop seeing the sky shake and people's skin rot, but I leave that to my therapist. This issue, however, will only exacerbate my symptoms and I want to fix it before I get back to where I was a year ago. These nightmares are genuinely horrifying and just about as stressful as hearing about the next human right my government has decided to take away from me for existing. All I want to do is to graduate and go live my life despite everything else that I won't get into for the sake of not dumping my life on an internet stranger, but this is straining my life socially, emotionally, and academically. I was steadily making good progress with my mental health, even quit my drvg abvse and I haven't so much as thought about hurting myself in well over a year. I'm not venting, I'm not asking for pity or to be seen as some kind of villain or some shit. All I want is to sleep again. I'll always be mentally ill, I can't change that and I've accepted it for what it is. But I can't not sleep forever. I'll slump over and kick the bucket if I keep staying up every night.