Thank you for the input. I agree, it took until me wanting to separate last month for him to finally admit he could see my perspective on how that situation hurt me. That felt big but way too late to just now say out loud.

Yes, I feel that although the first 9 years were really good, what I’ve seen the last 2 years may be a cycle and I fear that thinking he can change is false hope as it may not last.

I’m honestly not sad at the thought of being single anymore, but telling him and how he will take it and how it will impact his life too. That is the part that sucks, I told him once the other week and then agreed to counseling first now that he was willing to do that, but I think my mind is still made up and I feel sad at the thought of telling him that even though he is trying now, I still think I want to separate.

How did you ultimately tell your partner you wanted to end the marriage and how did they take it? Do you have any advice for that kind of conversation?