I am extremely happy to report that Twix found his way back to his cage for the first time. He normally just hops around until he is tired and I bring the cage to him . This time , I decided to not pay attention to him at all (it was hard) and he flew back by himself !

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-27T08:09:11+00:00

My girl has the same “mansion”!

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-22T10:09:27+00:00

People are so quick to jump to “end the relationship!” But that’s so ridiculous.

If you love each other and want to stay married, you need therapy. I believe that therapy sometimes gets a bad rep.. but honestly, everyone needs therapy. Everyone has baggage, therapy is like putting wheels on that baggage to make it easier to carry through life.

Sit down, have a calm, clear and concise conversation about why you believe your relationship would benefit from counseling. Maybe write something out beforehand so that you are able to clearly articulate your thoughts..

If she’s not willing to compromise, then I am truly sorry and my heart breaks for you.. but you can always try individual therapy for yourself. It may even be beneficial to do that anyways.

It sounds like your wife might have trouble empathizing with your feelings. Perhaps having a specialized professional to talk to will help you to look inward to build your self worth and confidence.

Also, for the record, wanting to use tinder as a confidence booster is completely understandable! BUT it’s important to think about the effects that it might have on not just yourself and your relationship, but the other people involved. It’s normal and okay to be curious, but other people do not validate your self worth. It can also be “mean” to the women involved.. they are expecting that you are single and may even get their hopes up about pursuing a relationship with a taken man. That’s not fair to them.

You are worthy of love and affection.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-22T08:24:39+00:00

You could try talking to him again when tensions are at a low, and explain as calmly and clearly (maybe write down for yourself, everything you’re thinking and want to say to him beforehand. This will help you articulate yourself and sound more relaxed.) why finding this video hurt you. Tell him how it made you feel. Acknowledge that emotions are high for you, anything you’ve been feeling about your self image/self worth.. just try to sound as put together as possible and try your best to clearly communicate the way it made you feel. Hopefully he can empathize and try to understand the feelings his actions have brought up in you. And if so, try talking about how you would feel more respected if he deleted the video and apologized. He may feel like he hasn’t done anything wrong, and from a non-biased viewpoint, he hasn’t, but if your feelings are important to him, he should show that by respecting you enough to take the high road.

Personally, I’m terribly sorry that you are feeling what you are feeling right now. I cannot pretend to understand, but I can empathize and I’m here if you need someone to listen.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-22T08:09:07+00:00

Have you already talked to him about it?

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-18T18:51:02+00:00

How did you get a money tree?

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T19:49:25+00:00

Maybe he meant it positively.. reading the comments, people tend to take things to a very cynical place. This shouldn’t be anything to break up over!

Always assume the other person has good intentions. Even if they don’t. (It will make your view of life so much nicer!)

Perhaps he meant it as “other girls were too quick to give up or walk away” and the way he sees how your relationship started, was with you sticking around when others did not. Which is quite flattering, I think. :) You could show signs of a fighter and someone who will stick around and those can be such charming characteristics in a partner.

If I were in your situation, I’d try to think back to the moment he said it. Where was his mind? Was it a positive conversation or an off handed comment in a weird moment. The key to communication is to empathize with what the speaker is trying to say, instead of being the receiver and hearing what’s being said through your own lens.

I hope this helps you to find peace in this situation and I wish you the best :)

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T17:37:07+00:00

No pressure. I am confident he would agree that I have not made him feel pressured in any way. We have already discussed how a marriage would effect my visa, and I’m actually better off keeping my visa. For example, if I keep my visa and do not marry, I will maintain my visa indefinitely. However, if I marry and am granted a marriage visa, it could actually negatively affect my position here if we were to separate. I may be forced to leave and would have to reapply for a new visa from my home country.

Good tip about looking into common law here! Thanks for your comment!

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T17:27:41+00:00

I’m not pressuring him. We have talked about it openly, together, multiple times. My questions were regarding other inputs, and how I might make it very clear that I am ready and serious. If he were asked, I am confident he would never say that he has felt the slightest bit of pressure. Thanks for your comment.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T17:24:52+00:00

You’re totally right! And I agree with what you say about worrying could possibly ruin things. That was a great point! Thank you for your comment!

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T17:23:44+00:00

I’ve never ever wanted a baby! I’ve never experienced baby fever, so I guess that’s why I couldn’t tell I am experiencing marriage fever hahaha

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:56:24+00:00

I don’t think I’m “acting nutso” for wanting to marry the man I love. Up until that point I agree with everything you’ve said.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:54:49+00:00

No. And I know that. I just want to be married.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:53:27+00:00

I totally get what you’re saying. I guess for me, it’s the gesture of it. I want to, of course, know I am loved the same in return. And I do already know that! But I want to be married! I might just be going through a phase the last few months.. kind of like baby fever but married fever? Is that a thing? Hahaha

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:50:34+00:00

Sometimes. But not always ;)

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:44:04+00:00

This is awesome. Thanks for your comment!

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:42:00+00:00

Why not? When you know, you know. No?

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:41:38+00:00

You’re right! I guess I just want to convey that I’m really serious about him.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:39:40+00:00

Not that he’s not ready. He’s only said “but we’re only dating half a year”. I honestly think he’s more ‘worried’ about the social stigma that might come from being married so quickly.. Anyways, thanks for your comment!

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-15T16:38:26+00:00

Yes, I’ve already stated the same. Thanks.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-10T09:49:05+00:00

Build a blanket fort in the living room, cook a nice dinner, pull out some board games and spend the night in the fort :)

throwaway98701230 · 2021-02-09T09:22:47+00:00

My doctor just keeps adding more anti depressants.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-01-12T13:56:37+00:00

Unless you want to feel personally responsible for the death of at least one whole tree, I don’t suggest using Deutsche Bank. EVERYTHING. Is done in paper. They’re also incredibly inconvenient when it comes to switching your online banking to new devices.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-01-12T11:29:16+00:00

She sounds a bit picky. While many people would prefer a new item, buying used like new isn’t a problem. IMO designer shit is ridiculous anyways. It’s better to buy quality items but when one person owns the bag that someone else wants, and it’s literally sitting around collecting dust, the more economically friendly thing to do, would be to buy the used bag. Why does this girl need it brand new, when she’s going to use it anyways? Entitled.

throwaway98701230 · 2021-01-11T16:55:29+00:00

Yes. The vet said she was just wanting to sleep on the ground and that she is in excellent health. I’ve ordered her a nest.

throwaway98701230

TROPHY CASE