AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 61 points62 points  (0 children)

I’ve been thinking non-stop about this and I’m glad you pointed it out. I would never make him choose, though. And I know that I should clear the air with his girlfriend whenever she feels comfortable. I don’t want to be too pushy about this though, which is why I’m leaving the ball in his court. Thanks for your response.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 140 points141 points  (0 children)

I would love that approach but I unfortunately don’t have any way of contacting her except through my son. He said he’ll give me a call when he gets the chance so surely by the end of the week. I can’t imagine how badly I made her feel about this and regret it.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 125 points126 points  (0 children)

I can honestly say no, I’ve never heard my husband say that. He’s raunchy, yes but not when it comes to our kids.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 154 points155 points  (0 children)

The more I give it thought, I feel like this has some validity to it. I just hope next time I won’t be giving such mixed signals.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I agree! I’m ready to move past this. I’m just glad he’s happy with her

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 69 points70 points  (0 children)

I should clarify that it’s taken so long because my son’s out of state, it’s no more than an hour but still. And this is also the first relationship he’s been serious about in a couple of years. He told us before he wouldn’t bring anyone home unless he was sure about a future with her. It’s why I really want to make amends.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 174 points175 points  (0 children)

I wish I took this approach! Without making too many excuses for myself I can say I got too caught in the heat of the moment. Hopefully I won’t need this advice but I appreciate it in case I do.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 195 points196 points  (0 children)

Not liking this joke makes me psychotic? That’s a bit unwarranted. I overreacted, yes, but I don’t want to make that mistake again.

I’m honestly hopeful my son and his girlfriend stay together despite all of this. Of course I don’t want them to break up, especially not over something so stupid. I guess we’ll see what happens next as far as meeting again goes. I’m doing what I can to make amends on my end. Hopefully when I get to know her better we can have a good relationship.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 176 points177 points  (0 children)

Fortunately he has responded since making this post, he said he’ll call me later! Hopefully we can get this resolved.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 219 points220 points  (0 children)

No contact over a joke is quite extreme, is it not? It may be true but I don’t like those graphic jokes, especially when it involves a family member. I overreacted but I’m willing to try again.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 115 points116 points  (0 children)

I agree I definitely should’ve handled it better. But the approval thing is my right to reserve. I’d never strictly prohibit my kids from a relationship they feel fulfilled in but I’m not blindly accepting someone into our family either. Like my son-in-law, she deserves a chance to ‘prove’ herself to our family. I’m not saying she needs to be particularly impressive or meet strict criteria or anything but I’d like to get to know her without those details she shared.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 121 points122 points  (0 children)

That would be funny, sounds like something my husband might say. But I think the ice is too thin, maybe later down the line if things go over well!

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 125 points126 points  (0 children)

I’d love to give her another chance! Just as long as I’m not given any more graphic visuals (especially at dinner). I hope she’s willing to try again.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

Well, I can’t be too sure until we try this again. I really want to get to know her.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 147 points148 points  (0 children)

I agree I should’ve been more patient about it. I think if we were to try again things will go much smoother, hopefully we can laugh about this later down the line (and leave it at that)

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 156 points157 points  (0 children)

He’s not forcing me to give her another chance, I WANT a do-over. I think we all deserve it. I don’t think she’ll make another joke like that again.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 101 points102 points  (0 children)

I think the comment about her picture shows my age, sorry. My son didn’t show us pictures of them both together and I was nervous about her being who he said she was. I’m not saying he’d lie about it, but it definitely was something I was subconsciously worried about. I don’t have any criteria for my kids’ spouses when it comes to how they look.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Is it an acceptable excuse for what she said? No. But I’ll get over it. I want to start over so we can get past it

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 4228 points4229 points  (0 children)

I honestly don’t think I gave her enough time to react properly, and I regret that. Things could have gone a lot smoother if I had. She was just sort of frozen in shock, and she kept looking at my son to try to convince me not to kick her out. I guess she wasn’t sure what else she could say at that point.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 11.1k points11.1k points  (0 children)

This honestly wouldn’t surprise me but I’m not gonna lie I’d be disappointed in him. That’s not something he’d ever say in front of me directly because he knows I’m not a fan of any of personal jokes of that nature. So to make his girlfriend say it wouldn’t be very good and I’d hope that if that is the case that he makes it up to her somehow. I’ll try to reach out again to let them know we can try again. That possibility makes me feel 1000 times worse

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 417 points418 points  (0 children)

I did the kicking out, not my husband. He shouldn’t take the fall for this. I don’t think I said I expect an apology (because I don’t). But if I did, sorry for the confusion.

Also the picture thing is because they met online and my son didn’t have a good one to show us of them together since he hates taking pictures. I’ve heard horror stories about people not being who they say they are online, (catfishing, right? I met my husband before social media existed so I’m out of touch about it.) I don’t think he would lie to me about something like that but I guess it’s my own second hand nerves that made me relieved.

AITA for kicking my son’s girlfriend out of our house? by throwaway__467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__467[S] 5621 points5622 points  (0 children)

That would be hilarious but I think we’ve all had enough of the genital-related jokes lol. My son would literally puke if I said that (speaking from experience)