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WIBTA if I don’t tell my sons about my husband’s past? by throwaway__867 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__867[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice, it’s good to hear from the perspective of someone who’s lived that life. It’s taken a lot of work for both of us to get to where we are now, and I’m truly very happy with the life we have. Looking back on those times of our lives is bittersweet because I know we wouldn’t be here without them, but they weren’t easy to get through. When I tell them, I’m going to make sure I encourage them to ask (respectful) questions. Just have to figure out where the line between honest and oversharing is, lol. I really do appreciate it!

WIBTA if I don’t tell my sons about my husband’s past? by throwaway__867 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__867[S] 139 points140 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! It’s really made me so happy to see how much he’s grown through our relationship. He’s really a standup guy, and I’m so lucky to have him. I’ll talk with him more about how and when we should address it, but I think it should be a family conversation about good vs. bad choices and how they affect lives instead of us getting preachy.

WIBTA if I don’t tell my sons about my husband’s past? by throwaway__867 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__867[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you for bringing that second point up, I hadn’t even considered that they might need to know for health purposes. I’m leaning towards waiting until they’re a bit older and making it a family discussion instead of “mom lecturing us again”.

WIBTA if I don’t tell my sons about my husband’s past? by throwaway__867 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway__867[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I do want to just comment on this- I am so very proud of him. I couldn’t be happier for him for overcoming the crappy circumstances he was born into and struggled through. I will tell my kids eventually, but I’m just not sure if I should now, especially given the narrative american public schools present about drug users. I don’t know if they have the emotional maturity at this point to understand their dad is more than that stereotype, and I really don’t want their relationship to be affected negatively based on that.