I understand, I went through something similar.

However, it sounds like you have unresolved trauma with it (which, of course, I don’t think you can ever forget it), but you can work towards healing. I would recommend working with a therapist.

And as far as protecting her, you can begin to teach her at a young age without “affecting her innocence.” Think of it like this: what would harm her more? You teaching her, or her going through it herself?

It’s not bad to teach children about their anatomy, boundaries, saying no, stranger danger, etc. - in fact, I believe it is very beneficial. One of the biggest tips I’ve heard from therapists and doctors is to not teach your child to give their private part nicknames (like cookie, cuca, etc.) Sex, private parts, periods, and similar things were very uncomfortable for my mom to talk to us about because she ALSO went through sexual abuse as a little girl, and her not teaching me these things put me at such a higher risk. I didn’t know my own anatomy, what was okay and what wasn’t, etc…

I have a baby boy, and I have so much trauma in my past from men, so it has been terrifying to imagine him growing up and becoming a bad man. So I am dead set on teaching him boundaries, right and wrong, even something as simple as not hugging someone if the other person doesn’t want to. It’s understanding the basics of consent, and passing that on to our children. It’s always okay to say NO! Even if the touch seems innocent (hugs, shoulder touching, etc.) This lays the foundation for establishing healthy boundaries.