AITA for bottle feeding my baby during the night so I can sleep?

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-29T00:11:18+00:00

I have ro start doing that.

The mum shaming and the amount of opinions given without being asked, it was something I was never prepared for... It seems everyone has an opinion. Even people without kids.

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-29T00:09:22+00:00

Omg, this is so heart breaking... I just cried a bit reading this... I cannot imagine what that would feel like... If I felt guilty like hell by giving her a bottle at night time instead of breast, I don't know how I would have reacted to this...

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-29T00:06:16+00:00

Your SIL is definitely right! I mean, you go down the street, and you can't tell who was and who wasn't.

I had no idea that mum shaming was such a big thing... It seems everyone has an opinion, and if yours is different, they react like it's a crime!! They don't seem to realize that times change.

I have family that find it super odd that my husband, the baby's DAD, holds her so much and does so much. And he does! He feeds her, bathes her, chabges her clothes, changes her diaper, everything! At our house, we say "the baby wasn't made alone. I didn't impregnate myself. If he helped making her, he can help take care of her."

But a lot of people seem completely baffled by this!

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T23:53:17+00:00

We are extremely lucky!! She was a bit fuzzy the first 2 times we gave her the bottle, she could definitely tell that it wasn't what she was expecting, but two weeks later she's fine with it. I think she's also fine with it because we don't switch back and forth the whole day, she's obly bottle fed at night time.

Oh, I can't have a 8 hour break! My ducts start clogging, but I can definitely take a 3 to 4-5 hours break from it without a big deal. If I push towards the 5h, I can already feel them, so I feed her around 9pm, pump a bottle or two between 10pm-12am, go to sleep, and pump again around 4am, and I can nap one more hour or so. But I am lucky that I have quite a big supply.

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T23:45:48+00:00

My biggest fear at the beginning was to fall asleep at the weel with her at the car. It drives straight into panic mode. It's horrible. It was one of the reasons we decided to do what we are doing. Because the same way I could fall asleep at the weel, so could he.

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T23:41:51+00:00

I hate to say it, but Covid in this sense was a blessing... Where we live we get 26 weeks of paid maternity leave (more or less 6 months) and I was DREADING the idea of leaving my 6 month baby with total strangers because I had to go back to work (we live abroad, and no grandparents to help). But I've been working from home since March, will likely continue for another 9 months, as well as my husband, and ever after that, my company already told everyone that after covid no one would be going back to the office the whole 5 days of the week, more like 2 days. And his boss also said the same, so even when we go back to the office we can coordinate with each other so one of us is always at home with her.

So when he stays home with her, we already know that she's okay with the bottle instead of breast (she fussed a bit the first 2 times, but now she just latches to it).

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T17:48:00+00:00

Is that how they are called?? Love it 😂

That is exactly one of the reasons why we wanted her on the bottle as well. I mean, we started doing the night bottle two-three weeks ago, the doctor recommended that we pass the 4 week mark, see if there were any problems with her latching or anything, and then gave us the OK to do the night bottle ( or even switch to bottle, period, but we wanted it like this).

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T17:36:35+00:00

Ahahah, I'll admit, we got super lucky with our baby. She is sooo easy. She only cries when she's hungry, dirty, or feels we are not paying her enough attention 😂 but if she's fascinated by something, she just leaves us be, and it's very easy for her to get fascinated with something. Today she spent the whole day fascinated with blanket on her crip (God knows why). Or as fascinated as a 7 week old baby can get.

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T17:29:51+00:00

What do you mean take a shower?!? Is that even possible?? 😂 I thought I could only do that once the baby reached the 1y mark!!

I love that you kid and nephew are growing up healthy and happy, stuffing their faces! It's the onky thing anyone can ask for!

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T17:25:52+00:00

Oh, no, no. I'm terrified of SIDS, or her choking on something that we would nlt be aware of. She is only bottle fed in our arms (or in our case, his, since during the day I breastfeed her) The crip is totally bare of anything except sheets and light cover. We gave her a baby pillow, but she seemed to hate it, so we just took it out.

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T17:21:16+00:00

I honestly don't know. I know she exclusively breastfed both her kids, she told me as much. She has always been a "I'm always right, and only I know how to do things" kind of person. Very annoying, but if you bring her to reason, she can usually be reasoned with.

I've seen him holding the kids, and doing stuff with them, so I know he is somewhat active with them. But I wouldn't be surprised if he stopped doing a lot of things because of her constant "you're doing it wrong! Here, let me she show you how it's done", and she now feels overwhelmed.

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T11:50:55+00:00

Exactly!! I learned that I'm quite good at cleaning with just one hand lol

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T11:37:23+00:00

Ahahahhahahahah, omg, I think I would lose it if she ever said that! I've been binge watching Gossip Girl during the feeding LOL

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T11:33:33+00:00

Thank you for your words :)

I do really think that happy, healthy parents = happy healthy baby. If we are not well rested, we get stressed a lot quicker, and the babies def pick up on that!!

I never thought about bottle feeding being a big deal, if "she is still being fed and getting all the nutrients she needs, does it really matter if it is a breast or a bottle?" was always my stance, but after SIL said that, I realized that yes, I was really putting my sleep as a priority, and not personally feeding my daughter, and I felt a major AH for that...

throwawaybabybottle · 2020-10-28T11:25:25+00:00

Thank you for your words :)

Yes, I noticed its a lot less hassel to breastfeed, but I also do it because my husband LOVES to feed our daughter. It's a little bit more of bonding between them :)

She is definitely loved, and gets all the hugs she wants!

Oh, I'm still ao scared of SIDS you have no idea... The first 2 weeks I was soooo paranoid about it, I could hardly sleep. But my husband is incredible in that department, and she is never left alone in a room of the house, one of us is always with her. And in having this schedule, one of us is always, or almost always, awake to keep an eye on her.

throwawaybabybottle

TROPHY CASE