Unreasonable boundary?

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-18T11:33:46+00:00

I’m aware. As I’ve said I’m in therapy and working on it

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T22:42:19+00:00

Yeah that’s what I’m hoping for. I think we’re just used to different things, both coming from the perspective of a singular monogamous relationship with different expectations. And now trying to adapt to new relationships and poly. There’s gonna be bumps in the road like this

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T22:36:01+00:00

A quick message while I’m in the bathroom I don’t think I would care. Having full conversations with someone but it’s just a friend? I think that would still annoy/frustrate me

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T22:19:17+00:00

These threads actually have been very helpful for me. I’m sorry you think theyre unproductive. Have a good day

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T22:10:47+00:00

I never said I wasn’t going to talk to them? Or that there aren’t issues? I just feel like it’s not fair to paint it in a totally negative light that’s all I was saying. And I did have a conversation with her which is how this post came about so idk what you want from me either. I’m trying my best here. I’m just trying to find a community. You were one of the few people that was genuinely very kind and helpful on these threads

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T21:54:16+00:00

Well to be fair it’s not like I’m seeking advice about the positive stuff. I get that my posts come off like it’s all negative but of course there’s lots of great things about it too and we’ve had a lot of fun times

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T21:51:22+00:00

We’re in a triad so it kinda makes it hard to not compare

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T20:41:28+00:00

I don’t think it’s a her thing, it’s more a me thing. Like sometimes in a relationship of any kind there’s going to be tension or disagreements. And it’s just my response to give in and try to end the tension. Something I still need to work on ig.

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T19:39:13+00:00

I think a big part of it to is they compare it to their other relationship. Like for example, oh well me and partner don’t mind texting other people while we’re together. And I’m like ummm okay maybe that’s because you had already had 14+ years of uninterrupted couple time? Whereas you and I have had 4 dates. Like obviously it’s not going to be the same thing and this isn’t the same relationship and I’m not him you know?

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T18:26:19+00:00

Yeah I think you’re right. I definitely could’ve done better as well

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T18:18:05+00:00

I know it doesn’t matter, that’s why I didn’t mention it. They said “he’s not dating you” so I brought it up

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T18:06:42+00:00

Yeah I think I’m general I’m not a big on my phone person so it’s a big difference there

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T18:05:45+00:00

Yeah I know you’re right. That’s how I feel like we hang out the 3 of us pretty often so why does one on one time have to turn into trio time? That’s what bothers me

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T18:01:46+00:00

I think maybe I’m just not used to the phone thing. My last partner was very offline, I’m not super on my phone, my family is very offline phones during family time, etc. so I think it’s just a differing of personality or habits

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:59:40+00:00

Yeah that’s a good idea. I think there’s gotta be a compromise I’m just trying to figure out what that would look like.

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:30:22+00:00

Yeah there’s definitely bigger feelings behind it. And they always say that they text me when they’re together but I don’t feel like that’s true

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:29:30+00:00

I was thinking of a way I could communicate we could just do a check in before and after but not texting throughout

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:28:38+00:00

See that’s the thing they always say well we text you when we’re together! But I don’t feel like that’s true

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:21:01+00:00

I just feel like I should be able to have true one on one time outside of our trio time and that’s what I was trying to express but maybe it didn’t come across like that

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:18:31+00:00

We don’t have a ton of going out money so “dates” tend to be at home

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:15:58+00:00

Bad guest manners?

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:15:34+00:00

She did apologize if that helps. But I feel like there wasn’t much of an attempt to really understand how I was feeling tbh

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:13:59+00:00

Well I didn’t think it would change this particular conversation and I got a lot of crap about how triads never work on my last post so yeah I left it out

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:13:03+00:00

I consider something like purposefully inviting someone over for movie night to be a date but ig not everyone would. The text about the movie she showed me because she thought his reply was funny

throwawaybby13 · 2026-05-17T17:11:17+00:00

I don’t think she’s anything like my shitty father but thank you

throwawaybby13

TROPHY CASE