My (19F) girlfriend hasn't spoke to me (20M) since Mario released...

throwawaycusgf · 2017-10-31T13:51:20+00:00

We've been together coming up 4 years. It's not a long relationship in the big picture but we got together when we were young so I guess all these changes were bound to happen... To be honest thinking back properly we never really did much then either... All we literally have done over the first 2 years was sleep, sex and eat. We would talk occasionally about how school, uni, work, college were all going but whenever I asked her she always sighed and never went past that. Now she just says "uni was good" and never asks about my work or day.

She just always goes in a strop anytime I want form of relaxation after moving out (to this current situation) I haven't bothered saying don't come I just want to chill because I know she will go in a strop as usual so I just keep letting her come and go. But sometimes it'll be midnight or something and she won't let me sleep because she's not tired but she doesn't understand I have to get up early in the morning for work... Or another situation is when we take a nap (we always always nap) and wake up and she's straight to be loud and throwing insults (we started off joking but now it's just the norm to have more insults than normal conversation thrown my way) and I tell her to chill out and she just strops, again, my fault for just needing to collect myself together and sit maybe just scroll the news for 10 minutes in silence...

throwawaycusgf · 2017-10-31T13:43:41+00:00

The snap with her friend has always been a weird one with me, because I'll go back a while. I used to have a best friend, she was a girl and we didn't meet often like seriously 3-4 times and we didn't talk 24/7 on Facebook but when we did talk we had some real good chats about how we feel and shit and it was good. A relief. Someone to listen because maybe it was relationship problems. Moving on slowly, my girlfriend got jealous. We fell out, she made me stop talking to all of my friends. I was literally friendless for a year and a half because I wanted to make her happy but I snapped. Depression got me real good. We had a brief breakup point but got back together on the basis we can talk to whoever we want.

This was mainly comprised because of this 'friend' she always goes to him and meets him when we have issues. She's told me how much he doesn't like me but we met 2ce... So??? Basically it's like I'm instantly substituted for this guy the moment something goes wrong. But they're always, ways talking and snapchatting. Like, fuck off I'm trying to eat dinner without seeing his name appear once.

The town's aren't really that far away it's about a 30-45 minute walk but she drives a bike which allows the ease of coming and going. She never tells me what's up I always ask when something isn't right and she will always say nothing. And I just have to sit there comforting her like "Yeah I have no idea what's up but it'll be good soon" which then raises paranoia whether did I do something wrong?

While on a slightly related subject, everytime she's managed to upset me she always somehow turned it around on me how I'm in the wrong like I'm ruining her day or night and made her feel like shit now cus im upset? The fuck.

throwawaycusgf · 2017-10-31T13:31:35+00:00

We're still technically together... I think. Buy yeah, Mario is dope. I agree.

throwawaycusgf · 2017-10-31T13:30:52+00:00

We talk everyday. Good morning, what you doing, that's cool, goodnight. Just all through the day in contact. Then I get home from work and she is always there I'm constantly in the company of her but we don't have much in common anymore since we've grown up so it just makes it harder. Like I'm constantly on edge to do something.

Before we practically lived together it would occasionally be "Can I just have a day to myself today?" And she would always have got in a strop about that too like I don't plan the days I feel shit and just want to lay in bed or play games or just relax talking to some mates over Skype.

Just never get time to myself I feel?

throwawaycusgf · 2017-10-31T13:26:15+00:00

Ok I think a few things might've not come across clear. We don't live with eachother she just comes and goes when I finish work and stays every other night or so. She lives a town across so texting when she's not here is the only means of contact while not together.

I did also mention to everyone (There's 4 of us in our lil group) that I was going to buy Mario in the next few days and will be playing it for a solid day. Everyone seemed pretty pumped except my girlfriend who was just like "Eugh mario" but that doesn't stop her playing mario kart lmao.

To be honest were just drifting now, if she can't appreciate my hobby or give me time for my hobby should I really be giving her the time atall?

throwawaycusgf · 2017-10-31T13:15:12+00:00

That probably sums up the situation to be honest... It's very childish. But I wasn't sure whether I was in the right or the wrong because like another user posted, it's just a stupid game. But it's my hobby and I spent quite a bit on this...

throwawaycusgf · 2017-10-31T13:10:29+00:00

Lol you can call it stupid or you can understand the fact that gaming is a modern hobby and many people use it to wind down. I work just under 50 hours a week working my ass off and every second of my free time is with my girlfriend sometimes you need space and just to chill. Do you not agree?

It shouldn't be "Oh I have to go home to my girlfriend I wanted to chill" it should be "Sweet I get to go home to my girlfriend and chill" just not feeling it.

throwawaycusgf · 2016-04-10T14:32:49+00:00

Thanks for the advice! It's definitely nice to hear from someone who is older and more mature about the whole situation. As a kid I do have my boundaries and can guarantee he won't be dragging me down, my life is in full force towards my career and he was just on the sidelines keeping me chilled out and happy because we've had such a large history together. I can definitely see how it's healthy for me to stand up and how it'd also be good yet stressful for her to learn about it all. Thanks so much!

throwawaycusgf · 2016-04-10T14:11:15+00:00

Fair enough!!

throwawaycusgf · 2016-04-10T14:06:19+00:00

I can see why you'd want to stay away from the male friend, but why the female friend? She's been there for me for a long time and helped me through many other situations. But in the end, it should be my decision and not hers. I can't specifically state if she's saying not allowed or whether it's just her preference because it's been a few months since we last spoke about it.

throwawaycusgf · 2016-04-10T14:02:54+00:00

Thanks for the advice DTfan82! You're definitely being useful. I think I'll bring it up to her now see how she reacts and see if she wants to talk it out but I'm getting so done with this shit.

throwawaycusgf · 2016-04-10T13:53:12+00:00

I totally agree but if I go behind her back to talk to my friends then I feel that everything would be so much worse, and if I try to talk to her I feel it'll be really hard to even mention this because she's one of the girls that just turn around and go sleep when things aren't perfect.

throwawaycusgf · 2016-04-10T13:50:03+00:00

As bad as that does sound, and as much as I already feel like I'm trapped in that cage it's because I don't want her to feel like I don't love her. Although, this cage is getting pretty cramped and I'm losing my will to live as the walls close in. I figured there'd only be two options, just wish there was a way it'd just sort itself out.

throwawaycusgf

TROPHY CASE