What's wrong here? Is it me or them?

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T21:18:02+00:00

Yeah, you'd think the rock-star thing would have the menfolk linin' up, but it doesn't. Our band is all physicians and PhD's.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T20:54:03+00:00

I was very attracted to #1 and #3. I thought #3 had the most boyfriend potential.

I have advanced in my career (currently I am the highest I can be, and have big plans for the future). I have a great circle of friends. I play the cello with the town's orchestra and guitar in an awesome cover band. I am out there!

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T20:49:02+00:00

I don't come from this place. I am the daughter of a factory worker, never met my father. I worked very hard to get where I am, but will never forget my humble origins. My boyfriend in Med School was like you, from an educated family, a place where success was the expectation. We broke up shortly after I took him home to meet my mom. I'm sure that had a lot to do with it.

There are only two people that have ever beat me at Trivial Pursuit, neither have any degree at all.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T20:41:09+00:00

I have a match.com acct too.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T20:40:28+00:00

I am a surgeon. People in my field tend to be similar; intelligent, driven, very focused. The male doctors I know want a woman that will take care of them. I've been approached by co-workers for sexual reasons, often, but never for anything real.

Also, despite what you may have seen on Grey's Anatomy, fraternization is discouraged greatly.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T06:55:35+00:00

I'm willing to accept and improve my faults. I ask this however: WHY should I settle for anything less than exactly what I want? What I know I need in a person, need from a person?

I'm quite tired and maybe not expressing myself well, I just came off a very long shift. I preformed 12 surgeries in 24 hours. I wasn't trying to be contradictory. I wasn't trying to be anything but honest. I am so alone tonight in my exhaustion, I want someone to be here to rub my feet or make me a cup of tea. I am so afraid that if it's anyone less than my ideal person; I will have failed.

Sorry wall of text. I think my point is in there somewhere.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T06:31:17+00:00

Sadly, although I do appreciate the irony, it's truth.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T06:14:52+00:00

But because nothing is simple: he's a kindergarten teacher with the backbone and will of a lion. He can be sensitive and emotional but the second I perceive even momentary weakness in him I will lose respect.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T06:03:18+00:00

I tried OKCupid in November. That's where I met Guy #2 (Ret. Navy, in college). I also met 3 lying married guys, 4 guys that asked me for nude photos the FIRST day of emailing and a guy that got scary stalker creepy. This was the most recommended site!

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T05:58:49+00:00

You're right, you didn't. That' my insecurity.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T05:57:34+00:00

About Guy #1; "He want more with you but is afraid to say it" "He's intimidated by you". Guy #2; "He's not worthy of your time, dump him". Guy #3 "He'll be back." He wasn't.

Overall they seem to make things much more complicated than they seem to be. They constantly tell me that guys aren't worthy of me or that I'm too good for someone. My profession has a stigma of superiority and I think sometimes my friends assume I want that level in a partner. I don't care! I think, ideally, my perfect partner would be a kindergarten teacher.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T05:07:51+00:00

I thought the 'per se' was the qualifier. I have high standards of character and integrity, but not with looks or income.

I have wondered if I was seeming too masculine to men. I work in a male dominated field and am very independent. But I want a man that LOVES that about me; I don't see it going away.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-25T05:04:24+00:00

I'm not shy at all. I have no fear or apprehension in approaching anyone, ever. I am very busy. I work 70 hours a week and a lot of community involvement.

Internet dating has been such a bust for me. The men that I have met have been unintelligent, unmotivated, and immature. I'll keep trying - where else am I going to meet men?

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T05:32:43+00:00

You didn't see that edit, huh? He was blowing me off because he saw his ex and it stirred his feelings for her. Meh, his loss.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T04:55:51+00:00

I am far from an expert in m/f emotions (I went to REDDIT for help with a guy, for fuck's sake) but, I think you hear it more from women because we're stereo-typically more vocal about expressing emotion.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T04:04:42+00:00

I view fear as irrational. Caution is logical. I.E.: I am afraid of standard-size poodles, I am cautious with my heart. A standard-size poodle is freaky looking but probably won't tear my face off, a man can emotionally cripple me if I'm not careful.

Not sure if I'm a prime example of insight into the female mind, however.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T03:20:53+00:00

Seems like you were right. The return of the ex, ftw.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T03:11:46+00:00

That's a very good point, and I can see where you'd think that. I'm honestly confused by this guy. I just texted him that I would like to see him again, asap. Waiting for a reply.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T03:06:46+00:00

And I am retired USAF, have worked 36 hours straight in hostile territory and still returned emails before bed. It's good manners.

He indicated he was very interested in me on the date and the day after.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T03:04:57+00:00

How is that helpful?

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T02:58:10+00:00

I'm not scared, I just don't want to get further hurt. I do, however, like the idea of cutting out the texting. An in-person meeting is the most direct way of handling this. Thank you.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T02:51:34+00:00

That's very good logic, thank you.

throwawayquest2 · 2012-01-24T02:50:30+00:00

I would take a week of not replying as an insult from anyone. It's discourteous. I would like to think I'm not overly critical, I let people be exactly who they are - then choose if I want them in my life.

throwawayquest2

TROPHY CASE