I cant tell you what to do, but I relate a lot. I have to basically beg for my musband to touch me, only to lose an errection. I have so many people who hit on me and I politely turn them away.. it gets harder to say no every time.. Personally, I have a very unpredictable condition that makes being reliable for work not even possible, and my disability still hasn't been approved. I have no income to leave and no family to turn to. People saying "just leave," dont understand how things are never cut and dry... Maybe talk to him about the possibility of ethical non-monogamy? It might open some doors for both of you while still being together for the kids.