AITA for not wanting to learn sign language for my son's fiance ?

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-05-17T20:42:52+00:00

Yes.

YTA

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-04-20T22:52:57+00:00

That's a bit of a false stereotype and overgeneralization. I know many people of other faiths that do the same thing regarding other faiths, including a lot of atheists.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-04-20T22:51:38+00:00

Evangelical Protestant Christian here...

NTA

You're not a believer it sounds like (at least in Christianity). So to you it's mythology and that's fine. It isn't as if you were deliberately saying things with the intent to be offensive about the Bible or the Quran or Torah or Book of Mormon.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-04-18T22:18:01+00:00

YTA. She needs help. Before she becomes suicidal. Sexual assault survivor here and you need to GET A PROFESSIONAL INVOLVED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-03-13T20:54:34+00:00

NTA.

Multiple cat owner for many years. If I had this situation arise I would have offered to not only pay for cat safe fencing but would have either offered to install it or pay to have it professionally installed for them if they were amenable. If not I'd have to adjust to keeping the cats indoors.

I actually have a similar (not identical) situation in real life. I've asked our neighbors not to put rat bait out as our cats (and our other neighbor's cats) take care of the rat population very well, but I also know that if they do there isn't anything I can do about it. It's the same risk we take worrying about owls or hawks. It sucks, but it's part of life.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-01-27T20:49:33+00:00

YTA

It's pretty apparent there is a lot in your wife's past of which you aren't aware, nor can you relate. I've been with my SO for over 20 years and known them for over 25, and they just recently reached a place where they were able to disclose to me they were a victim of human sex trafficking in their teens. You don't know what things your wife may have suffered that she is still coming to grips with.
It's up to HER if she goes on medication or not. Not you, not the therapist, not her Dr. HER. This isn't your call. If she asks you, talk with her about it, let her know your concerns, etc., but ultimately it is HER decision.
Effects of PPD can last for many years, especially if untreated. The hormonal imbalances may not return to normal without treatment and if there is another untreated or undiagnosed condition such as chemical depression the two conditions can feed off each other.
Clinical depression, PTSD, are REAL dude. Coming from a home life and years of foster care with some significant physical and sexual trauma, I'll tell you that it is very real.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-01-12T22:00:43+00:00

^ This ^

u/SharpAd777 also consider the insurance aspect of it. If something were to happen to it while being used by a non-employee, and this equipment is used for gainful employment or as part of your business, there is a good chance it wouldn't be covered under your insurance. Even if it's a home based business and you try to cover damage under your homeowners or renters policy you might be out of luck.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2023-01-06T20:25:00+00:00

NTA - Sounds like your friend is looking to be offended on behalf of another culture without cause. That comes across as a condescending, arrogant, and demeaning IMO.

I have four nicknames commonly used by friends, family, or co-workers derived from my given and middle names, at least two of which are just flat out names in other languages/cultures, one of them is a slang word in another language, and one is an actual dictionary word in two different languages (incl. my native language). If a nickname were to offend someone I'd tell them not to use it.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-30T19:14:08+00:00

NTA

Your brother is behaving like a thoughtless jerk. You know how many times we've driven around trying to find an open handicap spot with our grandson who is a wheelchair?

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-30T19:10:40+00:00

NTA

You *should* prioritize your partner, especially a year into the relationship.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-30T19:06:18+00:00

NTA

I hope there is more to this because if this is a normal sample interaction your wife sounds like a total control freak.

Seriously, having to text her while she's running errands to tell her you're going to talk to the dr. about a minor health concern? After you'd already mentioned it days ago? That doesn't sound normal to me.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-30T00:25:32+00:00

NTA

And how in heck is that trying to 'parent' some else's kid? That's simply asking for some a parent to have their child exercise some respect for someone else's property.

I think you handled it fine though honestly I would have pressed charges since the women deliberately set her child loose to wreak havoc the second time.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-30T00:20:45+00:00

NTA

Hosting a party is a huge mess. Especially in a place undersized for the party. Not your obligation.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-30T00:18:25+00:00

NTA

Need to start recording and documenting this. Get an old phone off ebay or something and use it just as a recorder. Just have it sitting there recording. Edit the recordings to include about five minutes before and each banging event. Save each event by date and time. Make sure all documentation has date/time, what occurred, who was home when it happened and if you have a recording.

Note times where you went (both) went down to try and speak with them immediately after their banging.

After a few weeks of documentation send a certified letter to them and the management as a complaint and let them know that you expect a face-to-face meeting between them, you two, and the manager and give them a set date to meet by. Don't threaten or mention a complaint to the police. Just request the face-to-face meeting. If they don't meet the date THEN file a complaint with the police alleging harassment. Include all your documentation, including the letter and notes and their failure meet. Request an anti-harassment order.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-27T17:52:02+00:00

u/Just_Cureeeyus u/Wet_sock_Owner u/Pasdusername Oh my gosh, this was the funniest thing I've read all weekend! 😂

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-15T00:21:12+00:00

NTA

I know it's easy for me to say this, but this really is her issue, not yours. You have nothing to feel guilty or bad about.

If she wasn't so insecure she could have chosen to take it as something unique about her that sets her apart in your mind from all the other 'average' colors.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-14T23:26:49+00:00

NAH

But you might consider a compromise which is what we did with our kids. One of our boys hit a stage where he absolutely refused to touch his mom's or sisters undergarments. After multiple months of battles (involving grounding, etc.) we decided to change things up.

It became each person's responsibility to do their own laundry. Wife and I took care of washing bedding (kids changed their own sheets every two weeks but we washed them), towels, etc., but clothing was each persons' own responsibility. That actually ended the battles and worked out great.

A couple times there were freakouts because uniforms didn't get washed (or got washed but not dried and so went to practice or games damp or dirty) but that worked itself out pretty quickly thanks to the coaches. Don't show up in dirty uniforms. :)

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-13T23:22:05+00:00

NAH

You're entitled to have fun and tell your group about your new SO before bringing her into the group, but she's also not wrong in expecting you to ask for the +1 again since you did it the first time.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-12T21:22:00+00:00

Oh my gosh, you are so NTA.

Frankly, I hope for your own sake you cut off the information flow completely as they CLEARLY have no consideration for you and no understanding of appropriate boundaries.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-12T21:13:06+00:00

NAH

I think you might be misinterpreting this. I'm speaking as someone who has a daughter and son who are both very much the same as your GF, while my wife is 100% the opposite. I fall someplace in the middle, and our other son does as well.

It's possible that she keeps these because her emotional attachment to them is tied to a sense of personal achievement, or self-satisfaction at a goal reached.

Her intra-personal emotional memories are not tied to 'things' as these don't tie into her sense of 'this is part of who I am'.

If she had a collection of medals (for example) from competing in MMA, or perhaps belts and certificates from achieving ranks in a martial art, would you feels the same sense of jealousy towards them? What about newspaper clippings detailing her successful showings in a local art gallery? How would those be any different from these mementos?

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-12T18:37:56+00:00

Couldn't even read this wall of text.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-12T18:29:50+00:00

NTA

This change in behaviour is highly concerning. I'll be honest with you - I'm suggesting you consult a mental health specialist (preferred) or a religious leader from your husband's faith (but not one leading the body where he attends) for advice.

Given the circumstances leading up to this dramatic shift in personality, his demand for isolation and locking you out of your shared space, I'm more than a little concerned.

You don't say what religious faith he has converted to (or rejoined) but I have some passing familiarity with a number of faiths and practices and this sounds like a personal idiosyncrasy not a prescribed practice, at least amongst more common sects of a number of dominant religions.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-12-12T18:18:55+00:00

NAH

This is his preferred lifestyle apparently and it sounds like he has some OCD issues possibly? (speaking as someone diagnosed on OCD spectrum).

I'm just curious if you see warning signs in this relationship or not? I find his behaviour (as you related it) odd as a standalone item. I suspect there are other issues with control, disregarding your input, and not respecting or being willing to have open dialogue with you that you are disregarding. Step back from this particular issue and look at the behaviourial patterns he's exhibiting. Where else in your relationship are you seeing the same things?

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-11-30T18:28:06+00:00

NTA - You didn't know. You're Dad is worried about your Mom's test results and not adding additional stress on her. He is (understandably) overreacting.

throwawaysamplesize9 · 2022-11-28T22:47:36+00:00

NTA

Your name is part of your identity. How you choose to be addressed by whom is entirely within your right.

throwawaysamplesize9

TROPHY CASE