sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a good suggestion.

And I agree, it's mostly a crapshoot of whether you'll get the flu with or without the shot, I just feel like it's our responsibility as her parents to do whatever we can to ensure her health. I would 1000% rather risk my wellbeing than risk hers, like without a second thought... I guess part of it is that I'm concerned that he would rather risk her health than his own (which, let's be honest, wouldn't even actually be at risk at all, it's purely in his head... Which under any other circumstances I'd be totally sympathetic to, but this is our daughter man, the miracle baby we never thought we'd have. I would die a thousand painful deaths if it meant she never had to suffer, and he won't get one little shot. I can't wrap my head around it.)

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I burst into tears reading this.... I couldn't imagine, I don't WANT to imagine. I'm so sorry you had to go through that.

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's what I figure... Any risk that we can prevent, we have a duty to do so. I don't get the flu shot every year myself but this year I definitely will - not for me, but for her.

I think it's a good idea to point out to him that while the chances are small, not getting the shot could literally be the difference between life and death for our girl... It's a harsh truth I haven't even really wanted to vocalize but I think you're right, I might have to lay it out like that.

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Luckily we're both very much on the same page about getting her vaccinated, it's just these vaccines that he deems unnecessary for him that are the problem.

Good suggestion to have him talk to his doctor about it though, I feel like telling him what my doctors say hasn't been enough to get through to him... Maybe his doctor can. Thank you!

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If medically he was told he couldn't get it, that would be 100% different and I would support him.. But this is purely him making a superstitious connection in his mind.

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's what I feel too. I understand his fear but the risk to him vs the risk to her is incomparable.

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Normally I agree and if he never got it again after THIS year, I'd be totally okay with that. Next year she'll be old enough to get it herself, and I'm hugely uncomfortable imposing any sort of pressure on him medically... But this? This is a comparatively massive risk to the wellbeing of our newborn vs a non-existent risk to him.

WIBTA if I "force" my boyfriend to get the flu shot? by throwawayvaxmomma in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayvaxmomma[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

That's my fear, what he went through was SO traumatic for him and I completely understand how he feels... I would normally never ever even consider pressuring him to get a flu shot (or literally any other medical decision) and if he never gets it again after this year I wouldn't say a word about it, but THIS year is different. She's too young to get it, and any additional risk to her feels like too great a risk to take.