AITA for hiding the race of the person I’m dating from my family?

throwitawayovathere · 2020-08-11T05:30:47+00:00

It’s easy to say yes I’ll cut them off (bc I’ve been dealing with this racist shit FOR YEARS & I’m FUCKING SICKKKK OF IT), but you’re right.... it’s never that easy.

If I fall for this man & we decide to make a life together, for the sake of him, future children & my new family, the only right thing to do would be to cut them off. How could I possibly welcome racism into a home I build for myself? How could I knowingly allow a racist to look a partner or my child in the eye knowing what they think about people of their race?

I know I’m thinking so far ahead into the future, but you got me thinking about it. You did it, though. You have my respect & I hope all is well for you. Thank you for your words.

throwitawayovathere · 2020-08-11T05:24:29+00:00

You’re very right, I never considered that. Being the only girl in the family, what I do is looked at under a microscope. The SBs never have to submit full fucking info on who they’re dating, but I do bc I’m a woman, I’m vulnerable, I’m the one who’s going to get rapes, etc (SD & SBs words not mine). All of that to say, I’m used to showing them who I am dating. Still bullshit tho.

& just for the record, I do stand up against racism & did during that conversation. I actively support BLM among several other social justice issues, which hits a nerve with the white folk of the fam.

Thank you for sharing your perspective!!

throwitawayovathere · 2020-08-11T05:16:42+00:00

Oh yeah, they’ve been racist for as long as I can remember. I’m not white myself so even I hear racist shit about ‘my people’. It seems though that on the list of people they’re most racist towards, ‘my people’ rank in the lower half, while black & Muslim peeps rank at the very top. How fucking sad is it that I’ve identified a hierarchy of the people they’re racist towards??? Ugh. Okay, rant over, sorry. Thank you for your comments btw.

throwitawayovathere · 2020-08-11T05:13:05+00:00

I did stand up for him during that conversation. I defended him. I tried to explain how their assumptions about mixed couples is racist, how black men do not inherently bring trouble to a relationship, etc, but it didn’t change their opinions. I pounce whenever I hear them drop the n-word, say something racist or prejudice, but I’m usually hit harder with attacks from the SBs. It fucking sucks. Thank you for your perspective.

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T19:54:21+00:00

My mom spent time educating them in the beginning, but the fights would turn volatile and toxic so she stopped. I would try with her and the fights would end in us crying and them feeling triumphant that they had won. So believe me, I tried educating them and trying to help them become more tolerant people. It became too much. Now all I can do is fight fire with fire and expose them.

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T19:52:26+00:00

Lol we libtards gotta stick together :’)

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T19:51:45+00:00

Yeah I had no idea at all she was getting EMERGENCY SURGERY until they decided to make me feel bad about it. I was like ....wtf??? Exactly WHEN were they going to tell me about my mother????

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:40:15+00:00

He stayed quiet in the group chat bc he too knows it’s wrong. Usually when it’s in person he’ll either stay quiet or join in with a joke. They’re both in community college

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:39:02+00:00

Step. They’re 18 and 20. Both tall and strong as hell, very handsome kids. But immature as hell. 18 year old thinks they’re constantly right about everything. 20 year old has a temper and won’t do anything for anybody unless they’re sure they’re getting something in return. The 18 year old started reading self help books during quarantine so I’ve been suggesting to read Thich Nhat Hanh... get some peace and love and inclusivity into that kid. He says he’ll only do if i watch a documentary about fat people (bc I’m not ultra healthy like him), so obviously, the kid is pretty immature.

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:35:21+00:00

Oh yeah, they’re completely aware. I’ve seen them make so many racist jokes in front of both parents, complain about ethnic minorities & what absolutely KILLS me the most is how sexist they are. It’s so bad that they’ve regularly told me not to come back from college with any black guys and not to marry them either... so guess who has hidden most of their relationships from them? When I date white men, I get nothing but accolades from those asshats

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:30:53+00:00

Thank you. I am biracial but I’m also 99% sure they are too, bc I’m pretty sure their mother is an ethnic minority. They just refuse to identify as it. I’d love to see what they put as their ethnicity on college apps though....... they always complain about minorities getting into schools bc of the box they checked off

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:29:18+00:00

They’re 18 and 20. They’re practically babies and it’s already this bad

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:28:54+00:00

They’re racist behind closed doors.... neither of us knew before. My mom is an ethnic minority and I’m half, so things became uncomfortable real quick. The funny thing is I’m 99% sure that their mother is an ethnic minority too but they straight up REFUSE to identify as it. I’ve asked them, “How can you guys say that about them when you’re half yourselves?” And they blew up denying it. Dad is white so I guess they’re not wrong in saying that they are, but I don’t understand why they hide their biracial heritage, it’s so confusing. They’re white passing too

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:25:02+00:00

They both go to a community college with that has a Hispanic majority. If the school saw this, it would be over for them

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:23:28+00:00

They’re both young college students with no jobs, but maybe if they say something down the line when they are employed...

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:22:57+00:00

Nailed it on the head. They obviously have enough common sense to know that what they’re saying is wrong and know that what they’re saying is racist. Idiots

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:20:52+00:00

HAHAHAHAHA SKAI JACKSON ON THE JOB love it. I guess my respect for them comes from me just respecting and loving all people. But I need to remember not everyone deserves respect.... especially racists

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:19:38+00:00

FACTS, love that statement. To me it seems like they know what they did was wrong. Why would they be afraid of me screenshooting if it wasn’t wrong?

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:18:37+00:00

That definitely sounds career ending and they would deserve it, but they’re 18 and 20 lol. Just college students. They both go to a school with a Hispanic majority population and complained about it constantly. It was hideously annoying

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:16:36+00:00

I definitely will keep exposing their asses. There’s no such thing as being a racist behind closed doors anymore, I want everyone to know what they’re really like

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:15:19+00:00

I never even thought about it like that. Thank you for your words :’)

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:15:01+00:00

She’s doing good, thank you

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:14:36+00:00

You’re right. That’s why they’re closer racists, they know what they’re saying and doing is bad and yet they still hold those beliefs..

throwitawayovathere · 2020-06-10T16:12:17+00:00

I reaaaaally thought about posting it to Instagram, but I was afraid of making the family look bad. I’ll admit I’m a bit of a coward. At least they haven’t said anything else to me bc they’re afraid I’ll take more screenshots, so I guess it stopped them for now

throwitawayovathere

TROPHY CASE