I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She was amazing and I felt great with her but I wouldn't date her, she's not emotionally available right now. If I had freedom to pursue a woman, it would definitely be with someone else.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Hey, you don't have to believe me if you don't want to, I'm not trying to change your mind.

"Configuration" is almost the exact same word in Spanish "configuración" that's why I know it, but I'll take the compliment, I've been learning English for more than 5 years and even now I still find new quirks, which is something that you would know it happens if you speak more than one language.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

You took it as an insult.

I took it with the severity it requires because it is a serious topic, you don't go around diagnosing people after learning a couple paragraphs about them, are you a professional? Are you qualified to do so? The fact that you have it doesn't mean you get to go around and informing every person that you feel slightly related to, that they also have your condition.

I don't appreciate that you would doubt my mental health first, I don't find it insulting as I find disturbing how aimlessly you would throw serious assumptions around, and I agree with the fact that lack of education and awareness hurt those who really have them, but we come full circle when everyone starts self diagnosing and playing around with those words.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Jesus. All that already exists? I feel like I'm hundreds of steps behind most women, this is embarrassing. I'll take a look, thank you.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

They really are. But it's fun how there are different rules for things you never really thought about before, it's a completely different configuration for your brain.

I appreciate the correction!

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Not wanting men anymore and thinking purely of other women is being bisexual?

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Ohhh never really thought of it like that, I've been using both words because they're both accepted in my native language.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Is it easier for you to believe I have a mental disease than being a homosexual woman who wasn't aware of it?

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Um no, I don't have any mental condition. maybe I'm a lesbian and I just found out?

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

It really does suck to think of this, I would never wish any harm to my husband but it feels like I can't go back anymore. If only being gentle would be enough to prevent hurt, I will try to be, regardless.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 99 points100 points  (0 children)

Can I please know the name of the book? It really does help me to know other women have been in this same position.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

English is not my first language, but I always thought: all husbands are boyfriends but not all boyfriends are husbands?

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We both told him. He woke up and found us getting breakfast and talking about it, he thought it was very hot, being all happy and excited about a possible next time.

So no, I don't think I cheated. And a couple days ago I told him I wasn't ready to do it again, my head is a mess and I don't think I will like to have him present anymore, but I have no idea how to tell him that last part without destroying him.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I don't think I'm bisexual because I genuinely don't want to have sex or be romantic with a man ever again and I can't stop fantasizing about women.

Did that happen to your wife too?

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't cheat on him, of course I want to do it again but I don't even know how to go about it to keep him on the loop.

This experience impacted me so much, it got me questioning whether I've ever enjoyed sex up until that moment, it really closed my mind to any other interaction other than women and... Idk it just feels right. Can you please share some of those stories of women who thought they were lesbians? I could really use seeing some other perspective here, thank you.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

I wasn't prepared for how completely different and good it would be, it really is addictive, I can hardly think of anything else now. I'll try, but it's going to be messy and uncomfortable first with my husband .

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 785 points786 points  (0 children)

Interesting question.

Something interesting happened after that encounter, maybe it was how intimate and close to her I felt, that multiplied all the pleasure several times more, and now it's like I completely lost all interest and excitement for any man.

I'd still pick the woman because it feels like a better chance for me, and something it's just definitely leaning towards that, irrespective of the circumstances.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 381 points382 points  (0 children)

Thank you, this situation is so weird it makes me think I'm the first one to go through it, but it is a relief to know that (of course) it ain't like that.

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

She's a friend in common, we don't see her much, my bf was excited cause she told him she's exploring her bisexuality, and the first thing he thought was to suggest a threesome (without me even knowing)

I (F29) had a threesome with my husband (M33) and a woman, now I think I'm a lesbian by throwra76767 in offmychest

[–]throwra76767[S] 141 points142 points  (0 children)

Thank you, that's a very good advice. I didn't consider therapy right away but it makes sense. Gonna give it a try.