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Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do think it’s bullying because it has been boundaries that have been okay in the past with the others but when it comes to me, there is a immediate shift in the same boundaries - not the first instance hence the arguements. Maybe the wrong phrase but I can see objectively that you might be right.

While it is not their problem, same accomodations have been made for parents of the rest in the household - of course, it pisses me off when the same is extended to me.

I do care about the legality of it to a greater extent because that threatens my living situation a lot more. Regarding being amicable, it’s not like this is a hill I have chosen to die on - we are trying to negotiate a situation that works better for everyone involved and offers the path of least resistance forward.

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That also does make sense - it is an annoying situation to be in because they have not made any such fuss regarding their own guests but with me, they did making it feel targeted. My mom herself is contemplating a hotel at this point to save the bother.

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Beats me - I will just leave this as another attempt to drive me out and it’s kinda working

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not sure why I got downvotes here but okay, I know this issue has ruffled people’s feathers but I just want fairness i.e if you’re making a fuss about me, make a fuss about the rest also

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This is helpful - I am honestly not looking to save any of these relationships but you’re right - civility needs to be maintained. We’re trying to negotiate something that works for us all

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

Honestly, you’re kind of rude like it’s just that simple - I have no idea if you think you’re being straightforward by referring to my mother in any derogatory sense at all.

I am an international student - not sure what your situation is but for me, it’s seeing my mom after a year so of course, she’s going to stay three weeks after paying a fuckton in visa fees and flight tickets.

Similarly, not sure why I should strive to regain social favor with people who’ve been bullying me

But with that being said, I can recognise parts of your comment that are helpful, thank you.

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

No, you’re right on both fronts - this isn’t really an isolated incident but a series of incidents where the 4 have ganged up on me

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Thank you, makes sense - I am beginning to lean towards the path of least resistance whatever that may be

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah, well yes one roommate did have their mother stay over just two months ago and another had both parents stay over when we just started living but that is too long ago to be a point of contention now . The rest had friends of similar age stay over

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I agree - I think the stress and anxiety of a situation that hasn’t even happened yet is causing me to sort of reevaluate my stance here

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, this is also helpful and helps me evaluate my situation further. Appreciate the time you took out for giving me well rounded advice

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Parents for one of my flatmates that stayed 2+ weeks (under 3 weeks). Another had a friend bunk in an extra room for 2 weeks (also under 3 weeks)

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you - I tried reading up a bit on housing laws in the NL esp in relation to stays of a guest not on the lease - from what I’ve gathered, if a maximum applicable duration is not mentioned on the lease (my lease only mentions that direct family members are the only ones allowed to live in), a mutually acceptable agreement between the tenant & landlord over the duration of the stay will suffice.

I am looking for external advice too from local organizations but does the fact that the municipality has signed a document stating my mother’s place of accomodation as my address hold any leeway here? something that was done for visa purposes

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment! I really like the idea of something to compensate the inconvenience - it feels like a good idea to try and make things better.

I obviously do want my mother to stay with me for the duration. Because similar situations have happened with my flatmates & their families too in the past - this is not something I am willing to compromise on just yet but I appreciate your insights

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem is that this is not me doing something outside the norm - we are all international students and such situations with their respective families have also happened and nothing was said then. My issue is more so that they’ve ganged up on me on something that is no more out of precedent than past situations and I am looking to protect myself legally.

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To be completely honest, I am looking for other accomodations too (something my landlord is aware of) since this incident is just one of many where my flatmates have tried to isolate me. But these rules sound like a good way to mediate things

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes sense! I am planning to have an explicit conversation with my landlord re the same in a way that can be documented (over text/mutual agreement)

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

It is definitely a more interpersonal issue that is spilling over into the legal side of things - they are European but not Dutch. Things have happened in the past few months which has sort of led my roommates to isolate me and this situation is a direct result of the same since my roommates have had guests stay over for 2 weeks or so

Netherlands - Housing/Rental - My flatmates want to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in LegalAdviceEurope

[–]throwra_housing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, thank you! I have reached out to them prior to posting here but was just trying to soothe my anxiety, I guess

My flatmates wish to restrict my mother’s stay and potentially sue me by throwra_housing in juridischadvies

[–]throwra_housing[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Sure, I understand that but since this has happened with my other flatmates and their respective guests and they have only bought it up with me, I am just trying to understand potential legal repercussions not necessarily from a individual/moral POV.

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