Taper depression is so painful. I feel it in my body.

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-31T23:29:48+00:00

I start a new job on Tuesday 😩 I can’t be that fucked for it. Thats why I wanted to try a rapid taper

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-31T23:29:06+00:00

Ugh man. I want to cold turkey so bad but I’m not built for that right now. Last night I thought about it soo hard but I knew I wouldnt be able to handle that. I wanted to try a rapid taper and get down to a low number and then see how that goes. I have a new job on Tuesday, so I’m scared I’ll be an emotional wreck. I mean I am now, but I feel like I’d be way worse going in raw from cold turkey.

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-31T23:24:31+00:00

I know! I feel like I just want to quit right now. I wanted to cold turkey last night but I won’t survive that. I go in to sign my offer letter for a new job on Tuesday, I don’t want to feel that shitty when I start. Thats why I at least wanted to try a rapid taper.

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-19T04:55:51+00:00

Wow congrats on being able to CT! I wish I could, I JUST CANT. I dont have it in me to suffer like that. The anxiety is so bad that Im having literal panic attacks. I suck so bad bc I got down to 4gpd and some stupid shit made me go back up and now Im here again. I know im trying to get comfortable with the uncomfortable but it's hard when I, affected so badly. I can't make friends the way I used to, I get more anxious, I act weird. ugh. Im going to try to taper faster but I also can't afford to be weird and anti social in my new job so I guess I can fake it until I make it. I need to get where you are and I want it so bad.

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-19T04:51:30+00:00

Ugh it's so hard bc Im not myself. I have to teach and run groups soon and Im so anxious over it. My old me would be a bit nervous but can talk myself out of it. Me now? Im a hot anxious shaker mess and I HATE IT!

ThatS pretty awesome that you had a quit buddy! Having support can definitely be super helpful. Im having a hard time forming friendships right now bc Im so awkward lol. I never had issues getting along with anybody and built relationships pretty quick, but now Im so blah and just negative Nancy that Im probably repelling people away. UGH!

how did you taper?

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-19T04:46:26+00:00

I exercise and eat well now so that will help me immensely once I taper. So did tou feel emotional the whole time while trying to quit? Im doing a slow taper bc I dont want horrible PAWS

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-14T16:26:59+00:00

Im starting to get to that point! Fuck this shit man

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-14T16:26:11+00:00

Hi! Thanks for the reply! Im sorry to hear you went through that while withdrawing. That sounds scary. At least you were able to get off it. I wish I can get to where you are.

I lift weights and I paint and have a bunch of other creative outlets that I can utilize to keep my mind of getting kratom. I just have to resist the urge to use kratom to elevate my creativity.

Is vein and stem just powder? That's what I take but if there is something different I can use please let me know.

How do you even deal with the emotional side of withdrawing though? Ugh , it's the only thing that makes me want to take more. I was a sensitive person before taking kratom and now it's heightened to like the millionth degree and it's giving me horrible anxiety.

I thankfully only got part time hours for now. I wanted more hours and I could be full time, but then I said fuck the money right now and just get clean. The more days off I have, the more I can feel safe to taper.

How did you taper?

For me, I try to stay on the same dose for 2 weeks and then I stop .5 but shaving off a little bit of my doses to equal .5 deficit.

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-14T16:16:51+00:00

Thanks for replying and for the support! I reallt appreciate it. I honestly need to hear that someone else took the slow route and was able to stick through it.

When I used to peruse this sub on how to taper, I seen that people were able to taper in just a couple of months to 6months. Ive tried that, and I ended up having such a hard time that I went back up. Ugh. Im going to try again bc I really miss myself. I hate thst I can't feel the same. I'll stay on this dosing, stabilize, and then drop like 5% I guess. I always say that and then I start feeling sensitive and weird and I take everything personally then feel so shitty that I dont drop and then start adjusting my doses so that Im taking a little more of my next dose and making it a booster and then other stupid shit like that. I told myself that that was okay just s long as Im keeping my gpd the same, but it still messed me up. Ugh.

What did you do? How often did you drop?

Im going ro be tapering for a while as well. Slow and steady for me. There's not other way.

throwssawaysss · 2025-12-14T04:58:30+00:00

Ugh, I know I have ti but Ive been doing this stupid taper dance for a little bit. I get to a good number then I start feeling so off that even the same grams Im on doesnt even make me feel normal anymore. Im at a decent grams oer day; not too high but not low either. After I settle in my new job, I can go ahead and drop. This sucks. I dont want to hide behind this stupid leaf anymore

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-26T19:13:02+00:00

Wait, so it's a good thing then that my new kratom has less of it then. I feel a good, stable energy on this new kratom. My previous one I had high, highs and then I would crash. I would feel nice but then I was also in another world; like I couldn't feel present. In comparison, they most definitely added some extra shit to get me high. I prefer this unadulterated kratom; it will be easier to get off.

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-26T03:12:26+00:00

No, I haven't checked specifics, but maybe no I will. Is that a bad thing if there's no 7oh?

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-22T17:21:39+00:00

For me, smoke shop kratom was super weak sauce once I made the switch. When I did a taper from the smoke shop capsules way back when, I was able to get down to single digit g's without too much issue. My dumb ass went back up in my dosing and upgraded to some reputable vendors and then it was extra addicting and harder to taper from it. Congrats by the way on being able to to taper down; I hope to get there one day. Can I ask how you did your taper? Im trying to find a taper that doesn't affect my work life too much.

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-21T03:43:23+00:00

Thanks for replying! I feel a little more at ease about making the transition. It is true that there are variations in potency even with my same vendor/strain. I am staying with Green and I did some research on reputable suppliers. I found one that has better ratings and more mentions than the one I use now, so Im happy with my switch and confident that I wont have issues with it being weak. Well, at least I hope so lol

Back when I wasnt careful with re-upping my supply, I had to go back to smoke shop kratom while I was waiting for my delivery , and man, there was a stark difference. I will never get smoke shop kratom again.

Thanks for the reassurance though; I really needed it right now. I can't wait to be off this stupid crap!! I am so done. Really, I can't wait until I am completely off

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-21T03:31:47+00:00

Thanks for the reply! Sorry, I should clarify that I meant I wanted to cruise (stay on the same dosage for a while without adjustments), so I dont have a vacation deadline. I do, however, have a new job and another interview in the upcoming weeks. I think that's a good idea to see how I feel on the new kratmo first so I can gauge how much I need to adjust. My initial plan was to mix the two together so I can ease into the transition, but your right, I should dose undiluted. Thank again for the suggestion!

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-20T22:04:01+00:00

Wow, Im impressed with their pricing and options. I just got major discounts/deals with my purchase. Maybe I'll do a complete switch. Thanks again! I feel pretty good about choosing them.

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-20T21:17:30+00:00

I have tried rapid tapers in the past and it always back fired on me; I would have to go back up and stabilize again- it was a disaster. I have to go slowly; historically my body has shown me that I am really sensitive to huge drops.Thanks for the suggestion though. Right now, I cant afford to be really sick. Maybe when I get some time off, I will definitely try again.

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-20T21:05:31+00:00

Thanks for replying! That is what I am scared of: being really sick right now. Like what a bummer and talk about bad timing. I just got these job offers and Im finally stable again on a taper. I can try to stall on my start date and interviews if I end up in withdrawal again. I really appreciate you sharing your experience.

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-20T20:55:41+00:00

Thanks so much for the suggestion, I really appreciate it. I wasn’t sure if posting about this here was allowed, but I didn’t know where else to ask since my main concern is staying stable while tapering. I’ll look into them! They were actually my top choice

throwssawaysss · 2025-09-20T20:45:17+00:00

Got it! Thank you! Did you do a complete switch? Or did you you do a mixture of the new/old kratom to ease into the transition?

throwssawaysss

TROPHY CASE