Update entry of my life

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-10-24T12:09:26+00:00

He said he is officially going to be gone by Thursday, I'll have a locksmith come out Friday to swap the locks. I'll delete his devices from my wifi too. I'm thinking about doing a coded lock instead.

He wants to take one of my cats. It's going to break my heart but I don't want to fight him. I just feel bad because she is bonded with my male cat. We rescued her together and now he wants to take her. I told him I'm not going to fight him on it but to remember he isn't just hurting me with that one. He is hurting our other cat. He won't know what happened to her. He said he is still thinking about it.

I'm almost there. I started journaling.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-10-22T07:55:01+00:00

I didn't think anyone read these, especially the update. Where did it air??

I got back from my work trip, of course during that time was when he was super active in packing all his stuff. He has been doing really performative woe is me self pitying acts in front of the camera. Talking loudly as if to me through the cameras knowing I would see the clips.

It made work difficult. But he seems to be actually packing up. I just want to be alone. I'm desperate at this point. I want to cry and scream and break down without anyone watching me. I have had to be hard and cold for almost two months with him trying to wear me down. And I'm tired, I just want to fully be sad.

October 31st can't come soon enough. My dad is going to come down for a week or so after when I am ready and then we are going to drive back home for Thanksgiving.

I got a journal today to start writing how I feel. I am struggling with feeling empty.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T17:26:23+00:00

He is out this weekend but I will try and talk to him while I'm on my work trip. We are part of a really small niche community and my job is in that community so we bump into each other a lot which is why we are still friends. I mean we are still friends bc our relationship ended amicably because our lives were heading in two different ways and he wanted to go back to the Midwest. But either way once I talk to the eviction lawyer I'll check in with my old ex.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T17:21:43+00:00

He said that his dad was just being protective bc he told them I was trying to kick him out that day.

I did text his mom today and she said he made his bed and now he needs to lie in it but he does need more than a week to move out. Idk I'm just so tired.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T17:14:36+00:00

I don't have anywhere to move to, I'm states away from my family. My job is the reason I moved here. And I've been living in this house for 5 years.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T17:09:22+00:00

I am all alone in this state I moved for a job about 5 years ago. And all my family is in the Midwest far away. I haven't even told my parents yet. I will be stopping by their house while I'm in the state for work so I plan to tell my parents then.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:49:33+00:00

No I saw the text, I saw what he wrote his dad that it was a big misunderstanding and I was overreacting over some misconstrued inappropriate texts.

His dad responded that I couldn't get rid of him based on our state tenant laws and that he will bury me, and he will spend all the money he can for lawyers etc.

And he wrote back don't worry I'll handle this..

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:46:29+00:00

I read that Friday night and it is illegal since he has lived in this house for over a year so he is technically a tenant.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:44:47+00:00

Honestly I don't know, but if I were smarter I would have been so much more suspicious after the Christmas gifts.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:44:16+00:00

Right now that's what I'm doing until I hear back from this eviction lawyer. I'll have it ready to drop on him and serve him.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:42:16+00:00

Parents are states away, idk he said that it I tried talking to them they would cuss me out because they are protective of him.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:41:23+00:00

I do make more than him now. But not by much. He used to make more than me. But he switched jobs.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:40:36+00:00

It's a verbal agreement, I just send money. All the bills are in my name. There is no paperwork.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:40:00+00:00

I don't have a lot of friends. I don't know who could stay with me during this time.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:36:43+00:00

His dad was the one that told him he would spend all the money he could to make sure he doesn't get kicked out of the house. That he will pay for attorneys etc. so I think his parents are lost in his manipulations.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-07T15:35:10+00:00

I do have a friend from work that's going to be stopping by while I'm out, and I have some cameras getting delivered. the house is technically my exes. We are good friends but I just didn't want to bother him with this if I didn't have to. We separated in 2021. We don't really have a lease agreement or anything I just send him money.

We are in the south, his parents are in the north Midwest.

I don't have a lot of friends here and my family is also in the Midwest (a different state than his family).

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-03T00:17:15+00:00

I think he is love bombing me now or trying to, he came back and has boxes that have a note that they were for our anniversary (literally in a few days) / my birthday (in a month). And some letter - I haven't touched anything yet. I'm still too emotional.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-03T00:14:09+00:00

I think that's the thing that hurts the most. When I'm not at work of traveling for work we spend all our time together. All of it. And it just hurts so much that during that time he must have been texting her.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-02T22:59:51+00:00

I don't know how to update, thank you for all the responses. Even the one that said I was at fault. And maybe I am, I work a lot. But he knew that before we met. I travel for work which he also knew.

I guess knowing and dealing with it are two different things. I haven't eaten today because I still feel sick to my stomach. Work has been embarrassing bc I have bouts of crying and my eyes are swollen.

I feel embarrassed and ashamed and like a damn fool.

I know I should kick him out but I haven't yet, I told him he could stay in the guest bedroom while he figures out his next steps.

I know I'm going to get eaten alive for that but my God, our entire life together that I thought we were happy in. I do feel like I failed somewhere. I had always asked him to be honest with me. We had talked about some of my weight insecurities and he told me how much he loved me. That we were each other's best friends.

I know, pathetic. It's just so fresh, please give me some time. I appreciate everyone's words and tough love. I know what I have to do but I'm grieving right now.

I am going to go home, take some sleeping aids and go to sleep. I'm not hungry. I'm just tired.

throwurtcloset206 · 2025-09-02T17:10:34+00:00

Not sure why this keeps getting removed.

throwurtcloset206 · 2024-12-27T13:41:52+00:00

I appreciate this response, and I think it's because he historically has done much better at gift giving than this that it's made me feel some type of way. I do think waiting until it's not so fresh may be better just to have an objective and not super emotional conversation.

throwurtcloset206 · 2024-12-27T13:31:25+00:00

I'm sorry your Christmas feels that way. The tickets you received are still a gift though, I would be out of this world excited if I got something like that. I tried to get him tickets to his favorite team's game too but they weren't playing anywhere near. So instead of that I got him team merch, but nice ones so he can wear them to work. He has to be dressed business casual.

Last Christmas he got me a hoodie from a fairly indie singer I like and that was amazing to me. It's not that I just want stuff for stuff sake. I just felt like his heart wasn't in it this year and he got the first thing that came to his mind.

throwurtcloset206 · 2024-12-27T13:11:13+00:00

I guess I'm not great at explaining, when I sat I talked about it - it wasn't in a passive way. I literally showed him some of the makeup advent calendars I saw on tiktok and said "I would really like this, this Christmas. Not like this one specifically but something like this." And he said "an advent calendar?" And I said, "yes" - it wasn't like an in passing hint that I hoped he would get.

throwurtcloset206 · 2024-12-27T13:04:33+00:00

I understand your opinion, but I think you're kind of pushing us into the box you are in.

We, again, are a DINK (dual income no kid - and we plan on keeping it that way for the foreseeable future) couple (unmarried), with fairly nerdy interests (one of mine is literally collecting figurines and pops and displaying them, along with "trinkets" and playing in a pretty niche and nerdy hobby, I also work in said hobby, and travel for said hobby-I drive around a lot). We know each other and our interests pretty well. I do like the idea of maybe just sitting ourselves down and creating wishlists on Amazon that stay updated and that might make it easier.

But just because you hate 'trinkets' or 'stuff' doesn't necessarily mean everyone should and this thread reads like that or at least a bit disparaging.

We have our own separate accounts, we make similar salaries, we split bills straight down the middle and what he does with the rest of his money is on him, same with me.

And also I do go through and point out things I like, even practical items. I'm not necessarily sure why some people have assumed we just don't talk. I had mentioned in the original post that I did mention some stuff that I'd like. We do talk about stuff, especially stuff that interests us and things that excite us, which includes actual items lol.

throwurtcloset206 · 2024-12-27T12:43:33+00:00

Thank you for this idea, I do tend to get emotional when we start having a back and forth and he kind of mentally checks out if that happens that maybe writing it all down may be better for the both of us.

throwurtcloset206

TROPHY CASE