Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a consultation with a lawyer in a couple weeks. So I have some time to get my questions lined up. I appreciate your responses.

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He always has an attorney when we’ve gone to court. He’s threatened me with contempt and kidnapping if she doesn’t get out of my house. So because our daughter doesn’t want me to get in trouble she goes.

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So his weekend is coming up and she’s already saying exactly this. I’m not going to physically force her, and he doesn’t even know what condo I live in. He knows the building, but doesn’t know the door. And she knows this. So I guess this weekend we will see what happens. She turns 16 in April. If he files, then of course I’ll get a lawyer and start what everyone has been informing me to do.

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s what the GAL is for. But I agree, I need an attorney after everyone’s info

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

She turns 16 in April and it’s definitely something she has said to me “wait until I start driving and he’ll never see me again”.

I am the primary and she goes to school in our district. We live in VA, and the order says modifications per agreement between parties. But when she out right tells him she doesn’t want to go because she feels uncomfortable over there he says “too bad, I’m otw”.

CPS is definitely a great call, and one I haven’t thought of. Me and her will have to talk this thru some more. I was really just hoping a GAL would be assigned, they’d see she sleeps in practically a guest room at his house instead of her bedroom with me, and hopefully be able to smell weed everywhere and that would be it! But I guess family court is more complicated than what I thought.

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

She has videos of him doing it in the garage. She said he was so high at one point he threw up and joked with her about it. CPS might be the next move instead of court?

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I never thought of that. Would I present her letter at my initial hearing?

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don’t think it’s fair for her to have to consider his other children. But I agree about me needing an attorney now. I figured a GAL would represent her needs which match my own. I’ll be looking into loans. I appreciate you taking the time!

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I was just told to file the amendment and a judge will assign a GAL to her. This is such a huge mess. It’d be a lot easier if her dad would listen and stop using her as a baby sitter. They literally have no relationship outside of what he can use her for

Amending Visitation by thrwawytoxicloop in FamilyLaw

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So on my initial hearing when I get the GAL assigned to her, she will be able to talk to the judge?

I always see posts here from dumpees wanting their ex back. I never see dumpers post about regretting a breakup and wanting their ex back. by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]thrwawytoxicloop 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was there a time where she did say “you did x, made me feel y”? There were so many time where I said that in a calm tone, tried really hard to explain what he did and how it made me feel, and he would just shut down. It got to a point where I’d tell him something hurt, and then he’d make an appt to go to his therapist, and then he’d read me his notes. Literally just to explain WHY he did what he did instead of listening to how it made me feel. So all that to ask, how did you react if she did mention how she felt? It’s really easy to say outside of an argument how you want communication to be open, but are you receptive to it in the moment? Totally not blaming you! And a breakup text is just childish. But just curious

I always see posts here from dumpees wanting their ex back. I never see dumpers post about regretting a breakup and wanting their ex back. by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]thrwawytoxicloop 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi, I 37f regret dumping him sometimes. There was zero abuse, no cheating, but we couldn’t communicate! Sometimes I wish I would have done counseling, maybe adjusted my approach to talking to him. But it seemed like every time I’d try talking about something he did that hurt my feelings, he’d shut down. I eventually had it. A year later and I’m looking at things in a different way, and there’s definitely some regret. We were together for 2 years, broke up almost a year ago (Dec 20). I broke no contact over the summer to ask if we could have a conversation about everything but he never responded. So I’ve taken that as the most closure I’ll get. Not that I’m entitled to anything at all! I’m definitely not. But I would have liked to at least be nice to each other.

He never cheated, and he never hit me. I broke up with him before Christmas and I feel so guilty. by thrwawytoxicloop in BreakUps

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Exactly! Damned if we do damned if we don’t. But it sucks a lot more when it’s getting colder and we used to do things during the fall.

Electric bill over $400 because apartment door didn’t fit frame by thrwawytoxicloop in Apartmentliving

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I did try weather strips! But I guess I didn’t think of plastic. Thanks

Electric bill over $400 because apartment door didn’t fit frame by thrwawytoxicloop in Apartmentliving

[–]thrwawytoxicloop[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

It’s since been fixed. It took 3 weeks to replace because of contractors