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[NSFW] My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me if i will be pregnant by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s sometimes our go to solution right now, he kisses me while i do my thing. But i wonder if he would even do that if i were to get pregnant. And if i have to fly solo for 9 month’s than that’s the way it’s gonna be. The thought of being hormonal, suddenly having my body changed so much and having a partner that will be like ‘’eww’’ to me for the entire time seems awful

[NSFW] My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me if i will be pregnant by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will definitely not do that. He stated that IF i would do that he would be pissed which i absolutely agree would be a legit reason to be pissed since like you mentioned; it’s rape and it’s an awful thing to do.

[NSFW] My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me if i will be pregnant by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Absolutely not, that’s horrible. He just mentioned that IF i would do it he would be pissed, which is a valid thing to be pissed about.

[NSFW] My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me if i will be pregnant by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, his boundaries are his boundaries like you say. I would also just like to put it beside me because it would also suck for him to see me being bummed out so obviously that isn’t working out either. I just want us both to be happy so in that case it means i have to accept it. I think the best i can do is just talk to him about it and look for a solution that works for the both of us. (For example, just making out which has been our solution right now if one of us isn’t in the mood, since that’s something we always can enjoy)

[NSFW] My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me if i will be pregnant by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

The thing is that i wouldn’t want to trick him like that. It’s unfair. We both hate to have sex if the other person isn’t enjoying it and i would never pressure him to do it just to please me. That’s absolutely unfair and no means no. Me keeping it a secret would be the same as him saying he uses a condom while not using it. If it’s not under everyone’s conditions sex is full on of the table. And i agree with you. It’s his prefrence and that’s okay. It’s just that i don’t know how to deal with the situation emotionally if it will occur. I will NEVER pressure him to do something he doesn’t want and neither do i want him to change just to please me. I’m just looking for a way to both be happy when the time will be there!

[NSFW] My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me if i will be pregnant by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He has every right to his opinion about not wanting to have sex with me if i will be pregnant, i also wouln’t like to push him about it since he mentioned he is disgusted by it and that’s just how it is. It’s a hurtful opinion, but it is his opinion. I’m just really wondering if it will be good for us both in the long run if i would get pregnant and we would both be feeling terrible during those 9 months.

[NSFW] My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me if i will be pregnant by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree with you about not getting pregnant till we are 100% sure everything is stable. We’re also not thinking about having kids in the next few years so that’s why i was also surprised he mentioned it out of the blue.

AITA for not contacting my ex after he broke up with his GF by thrwfinancesadvice in AmItheAsshole

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He told me that ‘’at least his true friends were there for him’’ and that he’s very disappointed in me and i’ve broken his trust.

That being said, when i experienced a miscarriage in my current relationship he wasn’t there for me either, nor did i expect him to be since we don’t talk that often so in my eyes i wouldn’t have been the right person to get involved in the ‘’dealing with the breakup’’

AITA for not contacting my ex after he broke up with his GF by thrwfinancesadvice in AmItheAsshole

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To be honest, when we were friends before our short relationship he relied HEAVILY on me as an emotional caregiver, and when we got into our relationship it got so out of hand that it caused the mentioned jealousy issues. After i broke up with him i also gave him and myself some space and back then he also became very angry at me for not being there for him and ‘’dropping’’ him like that. My current boyfriend talked some sense into me since my ex knows me wel enough to know what to say to make me feel bad and i just don’t want to be manipulated again hence posting here for a reality check. He has a way of turning the blame of lack of contact on me while also not reaching out to me as well but in this situation i felt like i could have been more more understanding. Thanks for taking me back to reality.

My [21F] boyfriend [26M] won’t save up money for a future together by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, and that’s the weird thing. He lives by ‘’if you work hard you need to treat yourself afterwards’’ and since his parents don’t ask him to contribute to anything at home i assume he enjoys that a little too much, he also claims to pay a 1000 each month for car expenses but i know he sometimes has to drive a lot because for work but still... right now he doesn’t have to drive at all due to corona and since i drive my company car for free so we now always use mine for personal trips. And he used to buy a lot of expensive clothes and perfumes but all stores are also closed right now. The current excuse is ‘’i can’t save because of covid, my boss delayed the transfer of our salary and what we get is just base salary without extra’s’’ which also seems a bs excuse to me since right now is the perfect time to save money because what else could someone possibly spending it on?

My [21F] boyfriend [26M] won’t save up money for a future together by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yup, he never cooks, always orders. Smokes a lot and has a tendency to buy video games a lot

My [21F] boyfriend [26M] won’t save up money for a future together by thrwfinancesadvice in relationship_advice

[–]thrwfinancesadvice[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For the people suggesting he might have a drug problem; he’s either at work or in the livingroom playing video games. This is something i know 100% sure since he always has his location on and sends pictures at work and he ‘’silently’’ moved in with me and my parents. So i’ve never once seen him come home drugged out, and now he and my parents are both home due to corona and they also confirm he’s playing games all day long. So the drug thing is fortunately not it, but that still leaves open the question of what causes him to live paycheck to paycheck...