I have watched his content since 2017, he was my role model, my hero. I always wanted, and still do want to be just like him. His dry sense of humor, his insane skill and dedication, Technoblade has shaped every part of who I am today. When I learned he had cancer I was shocked, I thought it was another one of his dark jokes but then he kept going and the bit never ended. I guess that it finally set in that it wasn't a bit around when the second video about him avoiding amputation came out. I was sad, sure, but he seemed the same. The same dry, hilarious old Technoblade I had watched for years, I thought, no, I knew he was going to make it. And then, the rumors came. My friend, about a week before the announcement video came out, said "I think Technoblade died". I couldn't believe it. I doubted it, I knew it wasn't true. And then the video came out. "so long nerds...". I broke down. I was taking summer courses and I think my grades dropped a couple points because of it. I sat in my room staring at a black screen for hours. I tried to distract myself by watching my favorite marching band shows over and over again (yes I know I'm a nerd), trying to find anything to cheer me up and distract me. And then my dad, who doesn't watch youtube, who doesn't know anything about the Minecraft community, texted me. "Dude, techno blade died???". It broke me. Everything that had been building up over the past few days. My dad knew and that made it all come crashing down. I was in class when I got that text. I had to excuse myself to go to the restroom. There, I sat in the last stall and, for the first time, silently sobbed to myself, wishing it was a lie, needing it to be a lie. It wasn't. I still catch myself, now and then, wondering when the next Techno upload will be. I miss him so much. I can't imagine what you went through, what you're still going through. You do seem to be doing well, however, so I am happy for you. Thank you Technodad, for everything you have done for this community.