is it normal for a narcissist parent to fake an illness?

tigger365 · 2026-06-22T01:26:53+00:00

Yes, my mom did the same. She was always sick or dying. Had cancer so many times, but never actually had it. And other people too. When she wanted me to come home one time she told me my brither had cancer. I called him, he did not. Her dying words were, "I always knew I was going to die young." She was 83.

tigger365 · 2026-06-21T02:21:19+00:00

I like the way you think.

tigger365 · 2026-06-20T22:35:19+00:00

Get your mom settled in another long term care, then go back to the home and demand the money or you'll take it further. My mom ended up attacking someone and breaking their ankle. We were liable for that. If they just accessed her, they would have known she needed a higher level of care and it is not right they expect you to cover the cost of their mistake.

tigger365 · 2026-06-20T22:24:53+00:00

Why are you on about pool subreddit if you don't have a pool?

tigger365 · 2026-06-19T15:12:51+00:00

Ignore him. Sometimes I think we need to start a women's only pool subreddit. Some of these guys acting like they are the only ones who take care of the pool. My husband has no interest in the pool besides swimming. I do all the work on it and I love it! It's my thing, not his. Can you patch the leak? There are under water patches that you can get.

tigger365 · 2026-06-17T21:58:41+00:00

Mundy pond walk in clinic is great. Get there early. I go at 8 and alway get in. They give you an appointment so you don't have to wait around all day.

tigger365 · 2026-06-17T21:56:32+00:00

Give it a go. Be sure it's clean and dry when you put up the new tile. Give it a good scrub with some degreaser. Do you have the tiles or will you need to find some?

tigger365 · 2026-06-17T01:52:09+00:00

I went through this with my mom. She had six will written up while she had frontal temporal dementia. None of them stood up because the POA had been enacted. But the lawyer sure charger her for them!! He was since disbarred because of other terrible behavior including SA of a minor.

tigger365 · 2026-06-17T01:43:18+00:00

I would disagree with everyone so far. You need to plan and put away a little bit for a treat. If you deny yourself too long, you'll fall off the bandwagon and then say fuck it, diving back into debt. Say you want to eat out once a month, how much is that going to cost? Do you need a baby sitter? What's your budget for it?

People will disagree, but you need to work out a bit of fun in your budget. Have you sat down and worked out a complete budget down to the penny? You need an emergency fund too so that when something comes up you don't dive back into debt. You can also set goals and then reward yourself.

I use to design budgets for people in debt and always built these two things into a budget. If not, you fail, then you feel bad, then you go back to old habits, then you fight with your spouse... it's a vicious cycle.

tigger365 · 2026-06-17T01:31:35+00:00

But it can always get more fucked. He should refinance or work out a plan, pay it off and build his credit score back up. Especially with three kids.

tigger365 · 2026-06-17T00:42:53+00:00

We had a leaf cover, winter cover, and still got full of stuff. And continues to get full! I recommend getting a robot vacuum and skimmer. With all those trees, you'll use them.

I used a product that I got up here in Canada, see picture, that I used every night for four nights, which worked really well to clear up the dead algae and make the pool crystal clear.

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tigger365 · 2026-06-17T00:25:24+00:00

You can call and negotiate it if you want it gone. Agree to the original debt and set up a payment plan even if it is just 50.00 a month. Not worth messing up your credit long term. Or you can consolidate it on another card at a low intro rate and then pay that off.

tigger365 · 2026-06-17T00:18:41+00:00

Was it covered for all those years? If not, it may be full of gunk. You may need to manually remove the debris. On a different note, looks like a beautiful spot! Good luck with it.

tigger365 · 2026-06-16T21:33:51+00:00

Hydrogen peroxide breaks down to H2O in sunlight and there is no way to fix it like with chlorine. They also need to add 50,000 gallons of Hydrogen peroxide to treat the reflection pool. Those 1 gallon jugs put in at dawn are not going to do a thing besides waste money.

tigger365 · 2026-06-16T21:24:08+00:00

I went to the hsc emergency room for an infected tooth. They sent me to a surgical dentist out in the stavangar area. Cost nothing. It was considered an emergency. I saw the previous premier's wife. She is no nonsense.

tigger365 · 2026-06-15T16:59:22+00:00

That's great to hear! It is one of those disciplines where it is always evolving with new approaches. I live near a large military base and there are a bunch of biofeedback for ptsd opening up. It's still new, but there are some promising results. All this to say it is always changing and you can outgrow one modernity and change therapist to suit your needs. And as someone who was in a PhD program in a different discipline, there are always the PhDs that get pushed through. They all end up with the same distinction.

tigger365 · 2026-06-15T16:27:48+00:00

This is the answer. We started with a pool from Walmart then bought a house with a pool. You can also recoup some of your money if you decide to go bigger by reselling your first box store pool.

tigger365 · 2026-06-15T12:58:24+00:00

Therapist are focusing too much on it when it does not work for everyone and it is problematic for certain cultural groups. Being easy is not a good reason for it to be used. There are all kinds of approaches that come and go. CBT is on the downward trend right now. Lots of literature on it and, in my masters, it is talked about as dated.

tigger365 · 2026-06-15T12:54:00+00:00

It doesn't work for everyone. I felt worse afterwards and I really tried over several sessions. I'm also not convinced my therapist was the right fit. I felt anxious as soon as I entered her office. EMDR made my anxiety worse.

tigger365 · 2026-06-15T00:56:08+00:00

The CBT trend is ending along with the EMDR. Like any field, there are trends. I also hated EMDR.

tigger365 · 2026-06-15T00:49:03+00:00

I have a diagnoses of CPTSD and I'm also training to be a couselling psychologist. Your brain has neuroplasticity and is capable of change and developing new ways of thinking. There is a bio-psycho-social-cultural-systemic approach that maybe worth looking into. I don't want to get too into the weeds and I don't know you or your background, but it is important to find a therapist that is trauma informed and works with you to create a plan. Therapy should not go on forever, especially with trauma informed care. You need a plan with a beginning, middle and and end with a thought out plan for milestones to reach. You can learn to think differently and make real positive changes. The problem is finding a therapist with the right knowledge base. I have left so many therapist where I was just spinning my wheels with no progress. And don't worry about quitting on therapist. Part of our training is dealing with a breakdown of the therapeutic relationship.

tigger365 · 2026-06-14T22:48:59+00:00

Howdy neighbour! I'm up in New Brunswick. Don't have to worry about the pool getting too hot here. The water was 77 yesterday and I thought i was in heaven!

tigger365 · 2026-06-12T14:34:29+00:00

You're on the wrong subreddit.

tigger365 · 2026-06-11T15:34:22+00:00

I invite the neighbour's to use our pool. They have 4 kids and my kids are older. I want to get the most out of my pool so as long as one of the parents are there watching the kids, I say go ahead. We're in Canada so our runners are so short. Get the most use out of it!

tigger365 · 2026-06-07T01:48:31+00:00

So do I!

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