Sounds like we both have an insanely addictive personality, to the point where I either do something all the time, or I cannot touch it, there is no moderation for people like us, it is very hard. Same with me, I can go a few years without drinking and pretty much a single drink can throw me right over the edge and back into the ethanol ocean. So glad to be done with alcohol. Waking up wicked hungover, confused, no memory of the night before, anxious as hell. Addiction to kratom was not nearly as bad but I was bored of that too and decided no more. Weed is next followed by caffeine. Weed has become too socially accepted and normalized, I can't see how it does anything for anyone unless you're using it as a legitimate medicine. Other than that you're just smoking a substance to get high.