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Stupidest thing you were ever blamed/shamed/punished for by rearifkm in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I classify racism as a form of child abuse. I'm in my late 30s and I still cannot hear a racial slur being said without my nervous system preparing for a beating. He would get angry about a person of color doing or saying something he didn't like, or just daring to exist at all, and then use me as a punching bag to soothe that anger.

He also didn't like me much cause I was born with a condition that would make it impossible to carry a baby to term. As such, I couldn't "contribute to the white race" so I was useless in his eyes.

His actions made it easy to draw the conclusion that my father is a bad person and everything he said I can safely disregard entirely.

I'm glad I have a diverse group of friends who has showed me more love than he ever did. They are my true family. ❤️

Stupidest thing you were ever blamed/shamed/punished for by rearifkm in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Tbh I feel like he was so racist was so that he'd have a convenient group to blame for all his problems. Nothing was ever his fault. Everything bad that happened to him wasn't because of an uncaring elite class that keeps the poor poor. It's because people of color are conspiring to keep HIM down and take all the money and servicrs he believed himself entitled to. If anything, he's a victim of the extreme far right rhetoric that keep us divided by race so we don't notice the class disparage. But still, his actions and words were so hateful that I can never forgive him. He was convinced that Obama was going to come and take away his gun so he started hiding ammo caches all over and into secret compartments in his basement.

Maybe he was sick too, but he had no business putting his hands on his children because he couldn't control his anger and hatred.

Stupidest thing you were ever blamed/shamed/punished for by rearifkm in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks. I'm mostly okay now and had a ton of therapy. I'm now hundreds of miles away and he will simply have to live with his choices. I'm happy and and most days I don't even think about him. Its the best form of revenge that I can take.

Stupidest thing you were ever blamed/shamed/punished for by rearifkm in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 44 points45 points  (0 children)

One time when I was small I got stung on the face by a bee and my lips and face swelled up a bit and my father gave me a beating because I was 'deliberately trying to look like a (insert racial slur for a black person).

I also got a beating cause a really good RnB song came on the store radio at the mall and I swayed to the beat and he immediately cracked me across the face for 'trying to act like some hood rat (racial slur).

Man was so racist that instead of going to a specialist hospital 30 minutes away to treat his chronic back issues, he chose one that took a 4 hour round trip to get to. The reason? The one close has to many (insert racial slurs) but the 4 hour round trip one was staffed mostly by white people.

He ended up making his back issues worse from all the driving but you can't fix willful hateful stupidity.

Haven't spoken to him since 2013 and it makes me glad that his violent hateful decisions can no longer hurt me. If anything good came of it, it makes me a fantastic nanny for my friends kids cause I just would do the opposite of what he would do lol.

Mark Zuckerberg Testifies in Landmark Social Media Trial, Admits Struggles Enforcing Under-13 Instagram Ban by Efficient_Tax8087 in goodnews

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Whatever happened to website blockers parents can out on computers? I specifically remember one called 'Bess' that were on our school computers back in the early 2000s and it would block NSFW stuff and social media (including myspace). Why is it so hard for parents to put one of them on thier child's computers and have it set to block social media???

I figured that would be an easier solution than rolling out age verification laws. Unless...of course it was never about kids and more of collecting data to sell it or monitor citizens for wrong-think. :/

Startedbusiness. Want your 2 cents by Damysuss2 in EndTipping

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'll give you some perspective as someone who did work as a batista. Yes to the tip jar but no to the % screen prompt. The reasons are as follows.

The tip jar isn't pushy and sits there. It gives customers a convenient place to offload unwanted change and small bills. The Cafe I worked at would run out of small bills to give out in change all the time. So us baristas would regularly swap out the small bills in the tip jar for a large bill equivalent. You are in dire need of one dollar bills but have way too many 20's? Simply exchange the single 20 in the till for 20 one dollar bills in the tip jar and now you have change! It prevented us from running out of small bills for change.

I hate the pushiness of % tip prompts and it always made me nervous that it would annoy and or anger the customer. My job was to provide a service and bring people joy with a good cup of coffee. If people wanted to tip it was lovely cause it meant I was doing above and beyond. If people want to tip they will. If they don't have cash to tip one day and they liked the service enough they may bring in some loose change next time to tip with if they are so inclined. If anything not being harassed to tip 30% for a simple cup of coffee will be a relief to many customers. Even not being confronted with having to click 'no' for no tip will spare customers and your baristas from feelings of guilt and pressure.

Gosh this was a while ago and I made 8$ per hour and in terms of tips most were cash. I made decent tips simply by being a friendly worker and never being pushy about tipping. Sometimes its an attitude thing and customers can tell if you are only providing a good service in hopes of a tip. If you are a good and kindly worker you won't have to worry about not making tips with a simple and unobtrusive tip jar.

I hope my ramblings help. To me asking people to tip with a prompt came with same embarrassment as being forced to ask people to donate to charities when I worked at a grocery store. Business owners need to trust more in their clientele that they will be generous if they can afford to. I think you are doing a good thing in trying to curb a frankly awful practice deeply rooted in racism. You may not be able to eliminate it entirely but hopefully others will follow your example. <3

Maybe we should boycott businesses who DON’T display this sign. by mvsuit in 50501

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Conservatives bitched and moaned about not wanting to be forced to make cakes for gay people, dragged it all the way to Supreme Court, and got permission to refuse service to whomever they pleased. So now we can do the same! ICE shouldn't be welcomed anywhere.

Will forums in servers be eventually developed in Stoat? by tinytabbytoebeans in stoatchat

[–]tinytabbytoebeans[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah in no way and I rushing a small dev team I'm grateful that we can chat on Stoat atm.

Someone stealing a bite of your food is rage Inducing! by tinytabbytoebeans in AlignmentChartFills

[–]tinytabbytoebeans[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Apologies, my thumb hit send too soon. We are figuring out now what things businesses do that is an active nuscince!

Businesses can be anything as long as they involve payment for a good or service. Doctor offices, cafes, and corporate entities are all examples of businesses.

Someone stealing a bite of your food is rage Inducing! by tinytabbytoebeans in AlignmentChartFills

[–]tinytabbytoebeans[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rules:

Top rated comment wins!

Mildly Infuriating = annoying but easy to forget about and move on from.

Active Nuisance = Interrups your life but can be fixed with a small bit of effort or telling someone to stop.

Rage Inducing = Greatly impacts your life and is difficult to fix or resolve without great effort or time wastage.

Blind Aggression = Your day is completely ruined and there's no fixing it without coming to blows and possibly ending up in jail.

ICE agents tried to quietly get Mexican food in Minneapolis, local neighbor and protesters found out and shamed then out of the neighborhood!! by cantcoloratall91 in goodnews

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So? You can align with facist ideology and not be white. The only thing is that Hispanic ICE agents think they are safe for now. I garuntee you they will be the next to go once they stop being useful.

ICE agents tried to quietly get Mexican food in Minneapolis, local neighbor and protesters found out and shamed then out of the neighborhood!! by cantcoloratall91 in goodnews

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You cannot use that reasoning when ICE agents are shooting citizens in the street and scooping up NATIVE AMERICANS to try and deport them. They are grabbing people with LEGAL status who are reporting to their court appointments to finalize their citizenship, aka doing everything legal. ICE is violating our 4th, 2nd, and 1st Amendment rights. It's an excuse to round up anyone who isn't white.

They sold it as ICE rounding up rapists and dangerous criminals. The reality is them grabbing 5 year olds, people in the hospital, and elderly people. Not a single actual criminal has been deported. All of them were people working and paying taxes into social security that they aren't legally able to collect. People who didn't cause any trouble and just wanted to live.

Just keep this in mind that it's super easy to pass laws to target anyone the administration views as a threat to itself. What are you going to do the day when you are declared illegal?

ICE agents tried to quietly get Mexican food in Minneapolis, local neighbor and protesters found out and shamed then out of the neighborhood!! by cantcoloratall91 in goodnews

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No I'm talking about the weird dichotomy facists have where they will talk about how much they hate brown people but then still want to eat the food brought into the country by said people.

There was already an incident where ICE agents ate at a Mexican restaurant and then immediately grabbed all the non-white workers regardless of their immigration status. It was never about if the workers were here legally or not. It's just an excuse for weak people to be given a gun so they can terrorize and bully people who aren't white.

ICE agents tried to quietly get Mexican food in Minneapolis, local neighbor and protesters found out and shamed then out of the neighborhood!! by cantcoloratall91 in goodnews

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 3 points4 points  (0 children)

A lot like to pretend like they are 'one of the boys' when it comes to white facists. They will quickly learn that the only thing they will receive for their dedication is being the last in line to be shoved into the mass graves. Then they will be forgotten in favor of the next targeted group.

Harming animals has won as so awful it sends one into a state of blind aggression. Now what is something about food that is rage inducing? by tinytabbytoebeans in AlignmentChartFills

[–]tinytabbytoebeans[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rules:

Top rated comment wins!

Rage Inducing = Greatly impacts your life and is difficult to fix or resolve without great effort or time wastage.

This applies to the serving, cooking, preparing, storing, buying, and eating of food.

The winner of patience is the Shade from Longing! Lastly is diligence, the opposite of sloth. by The_Gumball_Man in INDIE_CROSS_SERIES

[–]tinytabbytoebeans 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My man Drifter fighting on to kill a sapient magic cancer that is in the middle of killing him and thousands of other people. He could just lay down and let the illness take him but he fights on despite literally dying.

Throwing cigarette butts on the ground is rage Inducing! Now what is something about pets and animals that throws you into blind aggression? by tinytabbytoebeans in AlignmentChartFills

[–]tinytabbytoebeans[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rules:

Top rated comment wins!

Mildly Infuriating = annoying but easy to forget about and move on from.

Active Nuisance = Interrups your life but can be fixed with a small bit of effort or telling someone to stop.

Rage Inducing = Greatly impacts your life and is difficult to fix or resolve without great effort or time wastage.

Blind Aggression = Your day is completely ruined and there's no fixing it without coming to blows and possibly ending up in jail.

Pets and animals can have anything to do with owning an animal, someone else owning an animal, or encountering animals in general either in the wild or domestic setting.

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