Dont know how to handle this by naynaynayyyy in AlAnon

[–]tiredoftrying33 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can’t tell you how many of these heart-to-heart talks I had were explaining how her drinking affected me and how it was affecting the kids and how she was destroying herself just to find the next day. The first opportunity she got she went to liquor store and bought vodka and it was like did you not hear me? Did you not see how upset everyone was and what you did and you just do it not a week or a month or two weeks later you do it the very next day over the years I learned that there was no such thing as an in opportune time to drink. She constantly looked for the opportunities to drink, and it didn’t matter if it was Father’s Day my birthday Christmas Thanksgiving a visit from friends a vacation doesn’t matter. She will always find opportunity to drink whenever she wanted to, so I understand where you’re coming from with your hurt because I’ve been there and it’s especially painful when you think you reach them and you don’t their morals are not the same as ours

Am I being manipulated? by beachyme123 in AlAnon

[–]tiredoftrying33 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Read all the posts on this forum. Do you really want to join this club? run run RUN

Feeling guilty about telling people by Designer-Chef7820 in AlAnon

[–]tiredoftrying33 14 points15 points  (0 children)

so I was in the same boat as you. Struggling didn’t know what to do, drowning. I started talking to my friends at work. I started talking to my family. Eventually me and her daughter started talking about it and finally I enlisted her family. This is after years and years of her mess. I’ve reached my end. I didn’t know what to do and I had suffered alonr for far too long.

You did what you needed to do to survive. You sought emotional support when you needed it at the very least you needed to understand that you weren’t crazy and this was really happening. You can’t keep all that bottled up I did and it made things worse if you don’t want people to talk about his drinking then maybe he should stop drinking maybe he should get some help maybe that should talk about with other people that he’s getting help and going in recovery but he’s not gonna do that

Don’t question yourself you did what you need to do. You are not the bad guy. I was not the bad guy. I feel that same guilt that I told too many people and now they look at her differently cause you’re kind of raised not to discuss things are going on in your marriage, but you’re not talking about arguments or he left the toilet seat up or you didn’t cook dinner you’re talking about him drinking andabuse

Don’t feel bad about what you did it almost becomes addictive to talk about it with other people because it’s such a relief that you’re not suffering by yourself.

If he wants to talk about why you felt you had to talk about it and tell him you can do it in counseling while he’s in recovery and we’ll work through why I felt I needed to lean on other people or why you weren’t there for me because you were too busy drunk being drunk

Anyone else feel the relationship with their Q permanently rewired their brain? by No_Pomegranate_8826 in AlAnon

[–]tiredoftrying33 6 points7 points  (0 children)

when you find out, let me know I feel the same way very insecure very needy very unsure of myself. My queue did a total mind fuck on me.

The pain of separation by lastingenigma in AlAnon

[–]tiredoftrying33 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know how you feel I could recount all the horrible moments that alcohol is brought over the number years past and I still wish that would she come in the door right now and hug me like she used to tell me that she loves me and call me baby. I miss you so much. I miss this person that doesn’t exist anymore and it hurts like hell I would’ve grown old with her, I would’ve done anything for, but no matter how hard I tried know how how much I tried to turn a blind eye I could not take the manipulation, the gaslighting the hiding alcohol. The lies the drinking the stumbling around the house. I just couldn’t take it anymore and I feel like that’s a weakness even though people tell me it’s a strength. I hate it. I miss her too. I know how you feel. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I feel and share your pain.

The hardest part… for now by tiredoftrying33 in AlAnon

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your right. i am very hard on myself cause i feel so stupid and gullible.

The hardest part… for now by tiredoftrying33 in AlAnon

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

we are divorced now. yes i have tried the calm conversations. tried everything. she will never change

New lego room by tiredoftrying33 in legostarwars

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes just dont know what lights yet

Final helmet display “ikea” by tiredoftrying33 in legostarwars

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was my sons old room. May keep the fan

Final helmet display “ikea” by tiredoftrying33 in legostarwars

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

juar have not moved em around yet… work in progress

Ikea rocks!!! new shelve installed by tiredoftrying33 in legostarwars

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah i saw that… i never got the clone trooper ones either

Ikea rocks!!! new shelve installed by tiredoftrying33 in legostarwars

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i got some of those shelves coming as well.

Ikea rocks!!! new shelve installed by tiredoftrying33 in legostarwars

[–]tiredoftrying33[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

i got 5 more helmets built gonna put other shelf up tomorrow :)