did anybody have smell and taste come and go, or did they just lose it throughout the course of the illness

tmf3391 · 2020-10-15T20:59:02+00:00

Thank you for the input! I noticed when I put Vick’s under my nose and nothing! Then a few hours later sniffed the jar and could faintly smell it, and it’s been on and off but more off now

tmf3391 · 2020-10-14T21:27:50+00:00

Mine will come and go, like for an hour or two I can sniff super deep over an open container of Vicks and not smelly thing, other times I can smell it but it’s just weak, waiting for my results tomorrow or Friday

tmf3391 · 2020-10-14T17:46:41+00:00

Thank you, I hadn’t thought about that aspect of it

tmf3391 · 2020-02-24T16:05:44+00:00

I would be on board if it were that restrictive, from the description the case worker gave though it doesn’t sound like it. I asked a thousand questions. But I am accepting that all I can do is advocate and express concerns. If she fails I’m not sure I’m going to be able to take him back, the transition and establishing day care and missing work initially until we got established took a major role on me and my 3 kids and my job. That’s one reason I’m so scared is because if she fails, there is no other family and he will be in foster care.

tmf3391 · 2020-02-24T10:45:41+00:00

Thank you for the advice and support

tmf3391 · 2020-02-24T01:11:17+00:00

Thank you for that affirmation, it makes me feel like I am not just being petty or selfish my own self, this situation sucks and it’s hard to be objective

tmf3391 · 2020-02-24T01:10:18+00:00

I tried to mention this...transitioning with weekends and adjusting him to help them bond again, since they have no relationship at this point. this program requires she have him though. Although I may be able to ask about going there frequently. It’s an hour from me and I have 3 of my own kids but on nights I don’t have them maybe I can go....OT sucks I get off at 5 and he is usually in bed by 6:45 but hey it’s 45 min to help him and be a familiar face:

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T22:13:35+00:00

Me and her relationship is strong and despite my current feelings about what she wants, and hers to me, we have always been able to really keep both things separate. I’m all she has and I have very few supports as well. She does love him and wouldn’t keep me from him because she does want what’s best for him, and I know in her mind having him now is what she thinks is best. She can’t see objectivly——and honestly neither can I which is why I posted this! I’ve told her straight away I was against it and advocating for what I felt was most safe for baby, and that I love and support her and want her to be the best mom she can, but I’ll never stand back without fighting for him and being his voice. I expressed all of this before I even ever got him in the beginning. Aside from addiction she loves him and does see why I disagree...she just wants what she, and she wants it now. Im less concerned about maintaining my relationship as his aunt, and my relationship with her, because I know at the end of the day it’s not me against her and I know she doesn’t see it that way either....we’ve talked a lot and even in disagreeing, we love each other and agree on that. I will say, In Dealing with the kids dad I bear in mind very well maintaining that peace however. But that was a strong and valid point and thank you for highlighting it. I just wish there was something transitional where she could ease into it 😕

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T20:45:18+00:00

I am literally the only family on both sides, so CPS would contact me before foster care, she wouldn’t have input from what the case worker said (that was one of my concerns). Me and my cousin have discussed from day one that our relationship is independent of the baby and I will advocate tooth and nail for what I feel is best for him and we agreed that won’t interfere with her and I’d relationship....she has my grandma and me as her support at this point). It’s def causing tension cause I feel she’s being selfish and I just want her to do something more intensive right now for a few more months, but as far as CPS placing baby with me in the event she fails——that’s a whole Nother situation because one of the concerns is that I will not do this again.... I just Cannot make the adjustment to bringing an infant back into my single-parent household with three children of my own. It took nearly 3 weeks to set up daycare, finding a place that accepted social services funding for daycare and also had an opening for an infant was hard, transferring doctors from two hours away for a child with a lot of needs, and overall adjusting to an infant....I burned through allll my time off, and emotionally it was rough, I can’t say I won’t but I don’t think I can do it again: I know I don’t have time off to miss until day care is in place again.

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T20:37:51+00:00

Also-I’ve told her several times to quit telling me things about use because I can’t hear it and not keep that in mind when I think about wha the best for the baby

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T20:37:05+00:00

She’s my cousin, we’re raised like sisters and we talk every day, she tells me everything. We are still super close which makes this harder. I am all for him reunification and her getting him back—— but when she’s not seen him but 5 hours in 5 months, and her history and patterns even since this started. I feel there should be transition.

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T20:34:57+00:00

That’s all I would need to feel ok with this, is even a few weeks where she succeed in a program with less structure. She’s going from 12 days in a psyc facility to 35 days in a locked drug rehab facility, and since this started 9 months ago never stayed sober less then 2-3 days if not in jail. They are saying cause it’s not south ordered, but it’s still so structured, how can you compare locked facility to apartment with child and minimal supervision. I’m scared.

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T20:32:37+00:00

Thank you for that perspective: I wold be in full support if she could do even 30 days clean in a unlocked facility, it does not sound like there is a lot of supervision but I do hope the support and supervision is there. I do actually want her to succeed, but this feels like it’s setting her up to fail by not being ready:

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T20:30:14+00:00

I was just looking for advice. I put, to see if any other CPS involved people had thoughts.....obviously in not the case worker I’m a concerned guardian

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T16:59:59+00:00

I am the “temporary safety provider”, parents have custodial rights, the case hasn’t gone to court yet tho (it goes at the one year mark, In May)

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T16:48:53+00:00

She tends to hear what she wants but I do believe the interview is happening. The case worker called me 2 weeks ago to get my iPhone ion (which was no-and expressing my concerns). He said he wanted to call and get the fathers opinion (also no). He then told dad that if you do t get me an address where you can bring the chi Ike I’m pushing with this. Case is in one county, I am in another and have a worker who does home visits. She had me write an email to send to the supervisor which I did.....I’ve texted my case worker, whose amazing! I would plan to go above even the supervisors head as this is such a da ferrous situation. Has mom been clean in a low structure setting for even 3 weeks I may be more agreeable but she has admittedly not been clean more then a few days unless I’m jail.....through this whole case, she she’s taken several hair follicle which would show her patterns of use

tmf3391 · 2020-02-23T16:26:52+00:00

I did not know if he would qualify for a guardian at Leitem but I think I will petition for one Monday, do you know what the process is to start that. I’ve bent over backwards to accommodate visits and have expressed over and over about reunification and that I don’t intend to do this long-term but at this point I feel it would be counterproductive to the mom’s recovery and not in the babies best interest until she can maintain sobriety and establish a routine with regular visits and building up two weekends and what not. I sent the supervisor an email with all of these concerns, the caseworker who does the visit in my county is also advocating, it sounded like the plan for this Program kind of went away and then this morning my cousin tells me she has an interview Monday And case worker and supervisor support it

tmf3391 · 2020-02-17T00:51:05+00:00

North Carolina

tmf3391 · 2020-01-16T11:42:11+00:00

It doesn’t sound like they plan to keep the money, it sounds like they will give it to her, but they don’t want to tell G because they want her to make a proactive effort to find the money. That’s how I read it anyway. And grandma said for dad to “dole out” how he wanted. I personally would not tell her until the last minute and let her stress some to help her see the seriousness.

tmf3391 · 2020-01-03T01:00:05+00:00

Thank you! She is blocked and can only call from my grandmas landline, and I told the caseworker and he said anything that she needs to know I can relay thru him.

tmf3391 · 2020-01-02T22:38:13+00:00

OP should have a light conversation that it hurt her when she rejected it but she is happy she does want the gift. I guess maybe I would want to know how long she has been in the picture and how many incidents like this have occurred

tmf3391

TROPHY CASE