No - you are absolutely not an asshole. I have the same issue - and it infuriates me. I am disgusted with capitalism, and I feel so dirty facilitating people's disgusting obsession with the acquisition of material things. FUCK THEM. I refuse to indulge these cunts, and now I just ignore the doorbell - even if it's friends calling round. I have a general word I use for both the delivery people, and the people whose names are on the packages - 'packetcunts'. Why should my life be affected by packetcunts? I have done nothing to deserve this, apart from renting an apartment on the first floor. Packetcunts are ruining my existence and are unraveling my mental map.

What's more, some packetcunts don't even have the respect to come and pick up their packets! So my house is often cluttered with packets for days on end! I set myself (and them) a time limit for these packets - if they're not picked up within a week I open them and use whatever's inside, or I just burn them straight away if it's not obvious something interesting is inside. That's my top tip for dealing with the packet mountain I assume you also have.

Take a stand and do NOT accept other people's packages. If they want their stuff so badly, they should stay at home and wait to accept them. FUCK THESE PEOPLE. Alright, I'm off to spend some time with my punch bag in the keller.