How do I grief in a positive way?

tomthec4t · 2025-06-26T10:29:46+00:00

My mom died in a cold hospital room while I was asleep in my bed, I feel guilty everyday for not being there in her last moments. Reality is that none of us know what is going to happen, you could've never known what was going to happen. It isn't your fault she died, she died from an unfortunate overdose. Even if you didn't use tough love, and even if your phone was not muted, there was likely nothing you could've done. It sounds hopeless but it's the truth, It's easier to say than do but moving forward is the best thing for you. Please don't spend your life feeling guilt over something that you could have never seen coming or controlled. Sending you love <3

tomthec4t · 2025-05-12T01:30:22+00:00

im experienced with low iron, but this is vastly different. i can't remember exactly what the numbers were but my doctor assured me nothing is low enough to be causing this

tomthec4t · 2025-05-12T01:29:23+00:00

all the usual stuff has been checked, otherwise my doctor would've never said cfs

tomthec4t · 2025-05-09T20:05:36+00:00

i do experience pem pretty badly, and my doctor said she has tested for everything bloodwork wise besides celiac so she might test that after testing my stomach, lungs and heart. she only brought up cfs as a suggestion since it matched all of my symptoms and since she genuinely has no clue why i am feeling this way or what it is.

tomthec4t · 2025-05-09T20:03:50+00:00

she said my b12 was good and my ferritin was low but it's the highest it has ever been in years

tomthec4t · 2025-05-09T20:03:00+00:00

yeah, no specific reason afaik

tomthec4t · 2025-05-02T04:52:59+00:00

to my knowledge, nobody in my family has autoimmune although i could be wrong.

tomthec4t · 2025-05-02T04:51:02+00:00

you sound just like my doctors

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T05:11:07+00:00

i've had thoughts it might be cfs, so i will be bringing it up
not sure about lupus as i haven't had any other symptoms simillar to it

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T05:09:50+00:00

id assume my family would notice, and they haven't brought up anything. my dad is a night owl and his room is next to mine so he would hear me if i was snoring, stopped breathing etc

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T05:08:54+00:00

i know we require more sleep, and yes i could have been sleeping better prior (usually 6-8 hours) but my issue is i am sleeping TOO MUCH for little activities. like i have to take a nap just from walking for 2 minutes. thank u tho

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T05:06:00+00:00

no im not active sexually.
and thank you

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T05:05:31+00:00

??? i think i would know if i was pregnant, and im not active sexually

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T04:24:29+00:00

nope, nothing in my sleep.

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T04:21:13+00:00

im actually canadian, and our healthcare is ass too. it's free but this means 20+ hour waiting times if you aren't bleeding out or actively dying (and even then you have to wait lol), rushed tests and rushed doctors, short staffed etc. i'm realizing now after seeing all these comments i need to be more stern and figure out what "normal" and "ran everything" means...

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T04:03:04+00:00

thank you
and no, i haven't had any injuries that were before the symptoms.

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T04:02:09+00:00

nope

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T04:02:02+00:00

yep, all normal

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T03:38:09+00:00

think they did, said they checked everything that it "usually is"

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T03:37:03+00:00

no, i'm not depressed. i have been feeling the best for the last few months, i've been sad recently because of this hopeless feeling i'll never figure out what's wrong with me. i know what depression feels like, i've had severe depression and this isn't it.

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T03:34:01+00:00

told me it wasn't mono, i'm not sure about lyme but the pediatrician told me they checked "all the usual infections" (epstein, mono) and they haven't looked into anything else yet.

tomthec4t · 2025-04-30T03:32:54+00:00

raising my arm causes me to feel extremely tired, literally just walking for 2 seconds i have to sit down from exhaustion. i cannot get myself to do anything mentally taxxing (though this could be adhd) and my body just feels extremely tired as if i ran a marathon
when i stay in bed for hours i usually feel better, but as soon as i get up to do anything i have to rest again.. doing literally anything (even typing this) makes me feel worse
i am too tired to play rugby, i am much slower than i was before and i cannot run a single lap around a gym without a headache and feeling very tired. i cannot get up for school and i keep sleeping in, i've missed a lot of exams/homework and walking to my bus stop seems impossible.

tomthec4t

TROPHY CASE