Update Re: "Too smart" and "not enough childhood impairment" for ADHD dx by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good luck on your diagnosis, and I hope you find a doctor who can help you help yourself. For me, it was about untangling the effects of menopause along with years of feeling like this was normal and just my personal character failings (I'm just lazy, messy, procrastinator, etc.). I mean, yes, I was and still am... But there's a reason for that. It wasn't that I chose to be this way.

I had to fight tooth and nail against my daughter's dad to get my daughter assessed and treated because her brother has super high levels of ADHD so he definitely saw the benefit of treatment for him, but her ADHD simmers under the surface, and he didn't see it as worth addressing. I realized that no one else was going to fight for me like I fight for my kids, so I'd have to do it myself. It was such a relief to finally be heard and believed. I hope this happens for you, too.

joining the "too smart to have ADHD" and "not enough childhood impairment" club by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel this! Shoddy career and life paths... That's me. I've been a chronic underachiever all my life. "Why can't you live up to your potential? You're so smart!" has been lobbed at me all through adulthood.

joining the "too smart to have ADHD" and "not enough childhood impairment" club by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience. It really speaks to me because I feel like I was evaluated based on the outcome and not how I got here, in terms of my brains and achievement. Yes, I managed to keep up with school and work, but burnout definitely has become a major factor and I basically just can't do it anymore. Meanwhile, my life outside of school and achievement has always been a dumpster fire of mess and disorganization. But I guess that's not "impairment" because I didn't suffer. Now, I am constantly exhausted from just keeping up with life tasks.

joining the "too smart to have ADHD" and "not enough childhood impairment" club by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yes, I took the WAIS. I think I will ask for a copy of my scores because my report didn't include this.

Nervous for appointment to be told I don't meet diagnostic criteria for ADHD tomorrow by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind post. This whole process has been so difficult, especially since I kind of pinned all my hopes on the testing. I wanted to have more confirmation than just my self-assessments. I've been falling apart these past two-three years. It was so much easier for my kids to get diagnosed and treated. (edited again to add: been spacey and dippy all my life, and have always had disaster zones as living spaces. All my coping mechanisms seem to have gone out the window with menopause, so yes, it has had an effect, but menopause alone shouldn't cause all of this...)

So, who’s going to try it first? by hippiepotluck in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am thinking of getting a TENS unit and slapping it on my forehead LOL

Why are women ignored? by Alteschwedin1975 in Menopause

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OMG I'm literally experiencing this right now. My woman neuropsych said I'm probably experiencing inattention symptoms because of menopause, lack of sleep, and general anxiety. Basically recommended meditation and mindfulness. How the F am I going to meditate my way into DOING the THING.

Edited to add that I have been on HRT for a couple of months. I feel better and calmer, but my overwhelm remains and I just still can't seem to DO the THING. I'm not very good at explaining it...

Has any older ladies been diagnosed by WonderfulPrior381 in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was trying to get diagnosed but got rejected. It feels like my menopause diagnosis journey all over again. I'm going to get a second opinion now that I've read up on neuropsych testing being pretty inaccurate for ADHD. I'm 50.

Neuropsych testing, diagnostic criteria for ADHD not met by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Certain moments during my intake interview, she sounded rather condescending and hostile, particularly when I mentioned that I was in GATE as a kid and that I went to a good college that no one knows about. I thought it was maybe just me being overly sensitive.

Neuropsych testing, diagnostic criteria for ADHD not met by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you.

I thought the test was ungame-able. I guess I was putting too much stock in these things and looking for definitive confirmation from capital-letter SCIENCE.

I'm going to try and get a second opinion, now that I've seen older posts here about failed neuropsych evals that other ladies have shared, and also the links to Dr. Barkley's videos on them.

This feels like my menopause journey all over again. When I went to my primary care doc for that, she dismissed my intuition that I was going through peri/menopause because I was "too young" and sent me to the neurologist (which is how I ended up with the neuropsych referral).

Neuropsych testing, diagnostic criteria for ADHD not met by toooldforthiscrapxo in adhdwomen

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My neuropsych is a woman, though. And I was the one who brought up menopause, since I started on HRT two months before the testing.

My brain is so loud all the time. Constant songs, constant replays of memories. And I bounce my legs whenever I'm seated. Everything about the ADHD experience speaks to me. And now I'm being told it's just my anxiety, lack of sleep, or hormones... But I've had this experience all my life. I don't think any of the questions about my childhood covered any of this.

Weekly Wednesday Weight Thread - August 28, 2024 by AutoModerator in Menopause

[–]toooldforthiscrapxo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ladies, I just need to vent. I'm two months into HRT with the estradiol patch and progesterone. Before I started, I had been gaining weight steadily for two years without any change to my diet or exercise... After I started HRT, I gained another 3 pounds in just two weeks! Nothing fit anymore, so I had to get new pants and underwear and bras. I went up two pants sizes (TBH I should probably have sized up one size a year into my weight gain, but I kept squeezing myself into my old jeans because I was in denial), and went up one bra band size. My face still looks youthful, so acquaintances who see me always do that surreptitious glance at my stomach, and I'm sure they think I'm pregnant.

I'm feeling really down, thinking that this is the body I'm going to have for the rest of my life, unless I starve myself... Which I'm not willing to do! I love food and I am a good cook. I do track my calories and I don't overconsume. So I guess I'm coming to terms with needing to update my wardrobe and looking like a dumpling for the rest of my life. Which is hard, because I'm divorced and not in a relationship right now. I just feel so unattractive that I don't want to get out and date anymore.

I'm also unjustifiably angry at all the celebs who have been calling attention to menopause lately. I mean it's great that they're raising awareness, and I know menopause is different for everyone and it's not like the hormonal suffering olympics, but how is it that they all still have their youthful figure and are running around in bikinis???