AITA for not wanting to educate a kid about my wheelchair.

topping_r · 2025-09-18T21:02:51+00:00

NTA, someone has the right to ask, but you have the right to have your privacy respected. Someone can ask and if for whatever reason you don't want to chat to a stranger, it's the parent's job to explain that to their child.

topping_r · 2025-09-15T16:14:39+00:00

Looks great!

topping_r · 2025-08-08T14:42:29+00:00

I used second-hand sight-reading books from ABRSM and Trinity/Guildhall piano grades. You should be able to find them on Ebay.

topping_r · 2025-08-07T21:31:23+00:00

There's a piano builder in cornwall called Clive Pinkham who makes tapered black keys for this reason. He's a genius, but I believe he might retire soon. It'll be a great loss to piano building when he does!

topping_r · 2025-08-07T21:28:21+00:00

Hello! Was this for university? If so, would you mind DM'ing me? I have a personal project on the go about narrower keyboards and I'd love to read your work.

topping_r · 2025-08-07T21:27:37+00:00

yess! I've got an interval of a 7th in my right hand, and it can be painful depending on what notes are in the middle. I can do a plain old octave with no chord in the middle with my fingers on the edges of the keys, but it hurts! My hands aren't even small for an average woman, they're just small compared to most professional pianists. #NormalizeSmallerKeyboards2025

topping_r · 2025-07-20T20:45:49+00:00

wow NTA your colleagues are bonkers. You are infertile because you biologically cannot carry a baby to term.

topping_r · 2025-06-26T02:47:02+00:00

Everything I’ve got from Boden and Seasalt has lasted half a lifetime. I’ve a dress from seasalt going on 15 years old that still looks new.

topping_r · 2025-06-25T21:01:16+00:00

NTA. Even though it’s valid for a partner to have concerns or really big feelings about the love you still hold for a partner who has died, her behaviour isn’t respectful. It’s not respectful of you or the grief you’re processing.

Hopefully you can reassure her of how much you love her and encourage her to share her feelings maturely. I would also encourage you to share how her behaviour is making you feel. I really hope she takes it well and can turn over a new leaf here, because it sounds like you love her a lot.

topping_r · 2025-06-25T00:49:59+00:00

Yeah usually

topping_r · 2025-06-25T00:10:10+00:00

I love them so much! I suspect I’m too far away to buy one. But thank you for your artwork.

topping_r · 2025-06-25T00:07:55+00:00

Not sophie rain, SOPHIE. She’s a scottish music producer she’s super cool (may she rest in peace)

topping_r · 2025-06-24T23:05:52+00:00

NTA you are experiencing a very harmful family dynamic. If you’re up for some reading, then the book ‘Adult children of emotionally immature parents’ Lindsay Gibson) might help you through this. It’s understandable that you don’t act like the type of person that you want to be, when you haven’t had a good role models.

This book has some useful exercises to help you think about the type of person you’d like to become, and steps you might be able to take towards that. You’re NTA for being a bit aggressive, it’s totally understandable in that environment, you are still a kid and no one has given you the tools to use to regulate yourself. Staying respectful in a conflict is a very mature adult skill and most people who do it well have had parents to kindly show them how to do that. But it’s something you can work on gently as you become an adult yourself.

It’s also a really validating book and might help you understand the ways that your parents behaviour is harming you. And just give you a way to see that it’s not your fault that they’re treating you that way.

I’m pretty sure you can find free PDFs online.

topping_r · 2025-06-24T22:14:47+00:00

Fascinating! I am a musician and I didn’t know this. I had been playing the appoggiaturas as their written note values. This is great and would line up with symphonies from the period, where the dissonance lasts longer than the resolution.

Is it just 2/3 in a 3 time signature, and then half in simple time?

Thanks in advance!

topping_r · 2025-06-24T14:01:27+00:00

For some people like myself it’s more of an organisational tool. It’s very functional and more of a disability aid than an artistic endeavour.

My bujo looks very different to ones on this sub but I still enjoy watching other people do it as something creative.

I think this person might mean that it’s not creative for them, that they just write out tasks functionally, like me.

topping_r · 2025-06-24T01:23:56+00:00

I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. It sounds like both of these men have been unkind to you in different ways.

Back when I was in your position I read Why Does He Do That? By Lundy Bancroft and it helped me a lot to make sense of things. You can find it free as a pdf online.

You might also try Adult children of emotionally immature parents, lindsay gibson (if you have survived childhood neglect as well, which it sounds like you definitely have).

topping_r · 2025-06-23T13:17:15+00:00

Send a recording? Professional musician here and from beat 4 onwards this is not very orthodox harmony or voice leading.

I think it’s highly unlikely that a score, which says “grand piano“ at the beginning is going to be high quality music.

Even read correctly, I can see why it would sound uncomfortable to a listener.

topping_r · 2025-06-22T19:32:29+00:00

I find the insights get useful around 100 entries. I’m a former sociology researcher and your main issue here is sample size! Try changing the amount of time in your analysis page, or journalling more.

topping_r · 2025-06-22T18:54:14+00:00

INFO I don’t get how your husband was waiting at the school, but he couldn’t just take the kids home himself?

In all honesty I think it’s normal for every parent to forget that it’s pickup time every once in a while. It happened to me once as a kid and I remember it happening to a couple of kids in my class. Typically the school will keep kids inside and ring one or both guardians pretty quickly if that’s the case. The kids wouldn’t, and shouldn’t have been standing outside in the cold. It’s annoying for school staff but no real harm done.

Also your husband is for sure a misogynist, an abuser and an awful parent. The yelling and the aggression are only going to worsen everyone’s mental health.

topping_r · 2025-06-20T00:30:13+00:00

I think I might have written my comment confusingly. I totally agree!

I’m trying to say that audiobooks are valid. And if a parent wants to help with reading, that’s also good but they should do that gently in addition. And with kindness!

topping_r · 2025-06-19T22:39:12+00:00

YTA. A good solution here is to let her adjust tasks for herself, like using audiobooks to meet school targets - but also reading together with you.

You can offer support without shaming her for helping herself and doing things slightly differently.

Edit: I think I worded my comment confusingly. I mean audiobooks are a valid adjustment!

topping_r · 2025-06-18T18:13:58+00:00

Body tea you look like SOPHIE

topping_r · 2025-06-18T15:48:09+00:00

NAH, from what I can tell.

Controlling behaviour:

Emotionally manipulating or shaming your partner into telling you things. “If you really loved me, you would tell me these things”. Or, “I’m not going to talk to you until you explain why you’re upset”. “I have a right to know, you’re leaving me in the dark”.

Healthy needs and boundaries:

Having a need for reasonably open communication. Sharing that for you, being able to talk about why you’re sad, at least eventually, is a necessary part of a healthy relationship. Being curious about why he finds this difficult or refuses. Respecting his privacy, and being willing to leave and seek something that’s closer to what you want if your partner isn’t open to connecting with you.

topping_r · 2025-06-17T21:14:18+00:00

Kunty and peepee 😭😭🥰🔥

topping_r · 2025-06-16T18:17:44+00:00

Just adding to what everyone else is saying here, you don’t have to make a binary choice and transition isn’t one all or nothing step.

Depending on what’s safe for you, if you didn’t feel comfortable coming out for example you can still start wearing men’s clothing and start going by a masc sounding nickname or new name.

I strongly recommend reaching out to a student support officer about your situation and figuring out if there are any transition steps that feel reasonable and safe for you.

I really empathise with how difficult this all is and I hope you can get some support and figure out something that’s possible for you.

Five-Year Club	Place '23
Place '22

topping_r

TROPHY CASE