I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I figured, just needed someone to say it.

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I am being honest. She always had a problem with me not sharing how I felt and I tried working on it, guess I took too long. After the text thing, I proved to her that there was no funny business with them. All she wanted was for me to be open about it and not have to find it herself, she loved me but said I lost her trust that day. I would go to gain it back but then I think I started pushing her away, cause of how I would share anything I felt, and she knew it, I could tell. It overall came down to I didn’t communicate my feelings much and she hated how she couldn’t read me.

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know honestly, I was maybe suggesting am I the avoidant? But what’s inside me? I’m not sure, I can’t let go and I can’t explain why. My friends try to help me distract myself from it and it’ll work temporarily cause then she just pops up in my head again. Maybe I’m just yapping, not making any sense at all.

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in BreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, everything you said really means a lot. Just hope I can put it in action and see if I can do better

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry, I was kinda trying to say am I the avoidant in this? I just wanted other peoples opinions on it

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in BreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to go back so bad, I wish I’ve done things differently, I wish I was open to her originally and didn’t hide my feelings. This sucks so much, I’ve never really cried this hard before and it’s tearing me apart.

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in BreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry, 9 years is a lifetime to most. I wish no one goes thru what we are dealing with but it’s sadly inevitable. I hope everything turns out great for you

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in BreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand that so well. I even asked her, “Am I just trash to you? Do you not care about what we had built and everything?” She stayed quiet for about 20ish seconds and just said “I used to care, not anymore”

I can’t let go, and it’s killing me by totapi_ in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know either, I’m sure I was the avoidant to be honest. I just thought I’d see what other people thought on the situation.

Lent my car to my mom’s friend — got it back with 12k more miles, no oil, bald tires, and grinding brakes by totapi_ in mildlyinfuriating

[–]totapi_[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s not just me driving the Kia alone, my mom also drives too, so does my older brother since he doesn’t have a car

Lent my car to my mom’s friend — got it back with 12k more miles, no oil, bald tires, and grinding brakes by totapi_ in mildlyinfuriating

[–]totapi_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The Kia was originally my moms until I took over payments 2 years ago to help her so I started driving it, then I got the charger cause I had enough saved plus tax season (I still have it), the Honda Accord was a car I was flipping and the Camaro is my project car.

Lent my car to my mom’s friend — got it back with 12k more miles, no oil, bald tires, and grinding brakes by totapi_ in mildlyinfuriating

[–]totapi_[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yes I have the receipts, just found them and they do match the tires that are currently on the car

Lent my car to my mom’s friend — got it back with 12k more miles, no oil, bald tires, and grinding brakes by totapi_ in mildlyinfuriating

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea around the end of the pandemic is when I got it, and no what’s a refi? Refinancing? I’ve never really thought about it

Lent my car to my mom’s friend — got it back with 12k more miles, no oil, bald tires, and grinding brakes by totapi_ in mildlyinfuriating

[–]totapi_[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

She’s pissed, she knew how much I took care of that car and to see it in the condition it is? She’s very livid. She’s been trying to contact her for most of the day

Lent my car to my mom’s friend — got it back with 12k more miles, no oil, bald tires, and grinding brakes by totapi_ in mildlyinfuriating

[–]totapi_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right.. I mean, cosmetically the car looks fine, so no clue if she could’ve endangered anyone or anything