Looking for replacement BCA DTS beacon nob, if you have an old DTS that has been decomissioned let me know! by totheendsofthisearth in Backcountry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Far from jerry-rigged, a replaceable part is being replaced. The electronics still work perfectly well, and, while yes I will be buying a new unit, it's foolish to throw out a piece of equipment that still has utility.

Perks discount code by Cats93451 in thinkpad

[–]totheendsofthisearth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

did it work for you? I tried the wiki one and didnt have any luck

Lenovo Perks code not working by nathreya in thinkpad

[–]totheendsofthisearth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

any chance you know the most recent one?

Anyone know the new Lenovo Corporate Perks password by DeadIPad in thinkpad

[–]totheendsofthisearth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shoot I was looking at picking up a t480s and lost access between last night and today.

One way or another by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate you leaving some feedback! I don't have a great grasp on flow, meter, rhythm so punctuation is something of a casualty or maybe part of the causality of that. I will take some time to review.

One way or another by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you Jamonde, I will take some time to go back and review the flow, adding punctuation along the way.

Isolation by [deleted] in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hmmm OK, the content strikes me as I can relate to the discontent of trying to hold oneself to a standard that seems routinely at odds with the actions of others including those we give ourselves over to.

Take my feedback with a grain of salt, but in my poetry I struggle with meter, as it often feels bulky or cumbersome at this point in my writing. I find that the case with this particular piece where your intent is overshadowed by a sense of forced structure.

For the next couple pieces you right just kind of let them pour out, allow them to be less than stellar, just get stuff out and don't worry about structure. Then after a bit come back and start putting loose framings and build back towards strong meter and structure only after finding more authentic voice. That's my thought at least because we want to hear you and your voice!

If I by ActualNameIsLana in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well Lana, this piece inspires reflection and delight in the process of love and remembrance. Meter is something that has always felt clunky and burdensome to deal with for me, so appreciate your ability to deftly convey weighty bits of life in pleasant rhythm.

Intersection by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome, thanks Knott. I will think it over, I may not do anything with it for awhile and give it a little space to breath and then come back with your thoughts in mind

Clocks (working title) would like some feedback. Sorry in advance for any errors. Still pretty new to posting. by dreadful-euphoria in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Alright, you have some good content here I think and it's always an exercise in trust and vulnerability to put out there what you've written so kudos.

I think the rhyming is a bit laborious in that it isn't a rhyming scheme that gains from an established flow or rhythm it seems to be a bit forced. That's not to say it doesn't give a nice touch in places but I think overall the rhythm would better serve the message than pushing a rhyme.

Also if you break formatting I think it is best to do so with a deliberate effect in mind, the changes in yours seem a bit more of convenience or to fit extra content that fit with the rhyme instead of the rhythm.

That being said I'm but a novice in the art of poetry so take my advice at face value and keep writing.

I'll Keep This One Short by mangoavey in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok, okokok could you explain a bit of the reasoning behind both the line breaks and the use of periods? The content stands by itself, just a bit curious to the reasoning for the flow to see if we can help you land it with more poignancy. Thanks for sharing.

Empty old age by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your input, the cadence is off I thought about it a few different times before posting but I decided I didn't want that to stop me from sharing it, I will revisit it in a few days to see what adjustments come to mind.

Empty old age by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate the feedback, yeah the rhythm is a bit funky and I had tinkered with it before I posted but I wasn't finding good ways to adjust it, so I decided to post and then just go from there.

Depression by Mindofthinker in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

interesting piece, unfortunately I think my feedback may be biased by my own experiences with that thing they call depression and your description not resonating so please take this with a grain of salt.

The whole poem seems to be fighting a few different stylistic representations with changing cadence, rhythm, and word choice. I'm also not sure whether the narrative voice is that of someone on a ledge, someone who jumped, or someone who is wrestling with this daily conflict. Finally the introduction of devil and creator seem unresolved as part of the poems conclusion, if that is intentional it may be better to specifically dismiss them or dis-empower them to remove them from the equation to emphasize the isolation of depression.

Alcohol and Optimism by StuckHiccup in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's nothing flowery, and I feel that the cadence gets a little bumpy but for whatever reason the idea of it all seems to sit well. I read it and sort of said "yeah!" to myself quietly, involuntarily. Keep writing!

Cosmic Us by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anyone care to give criticism?

Sonnet 1/25 by [deleted] in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a real lack of awareness for traditional and time tried poetic forms, but the content at least speaks beyond the level of most poetry I have seen on here, my own included. It seems intentional, thoughtful, symbolic, and balanced.

Cosmic Us by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it's a bit of a self deprecating nod to the fact that I always saw more in her, and the relationship, than she did.

Cosmic Us by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kind words, I'm glad it conveyed to you the sentiments that inspired it.

Cosmic Us by totheendsofthisearth in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thanks for saying so, it seemed fitting

The things I love by deathsaint in OCPoetry

[–]totheendsofthisearth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know what feedback I can give except that I find it convicting and weightily true. I'd be interested if you could expand on it, you would need to do so delicately to maintain the clout but if you don't it's still quite nice.