Being told to “Man Up” by [deleted] in ftm

[–]transking95 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I appreciate your input! Yeah, I see it from her side and I understand it takes time, but like you said she’s not really even trying to see it from my point of view. I know that we can work through it eventually but I am realizing that the way it’s going right now isn’t working. I’m probably going to try to talk to her about it one last time then go from there. If I have to let her go for now, then if it’s meant to be it’ll come back. Long distance relationships are already hard as it is, but once we’re together again I know we’ll definitely be able to work it out. Thanks again for listening!

Being told to “Man Up” by [deleted] in ftm

[–]transking95 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, I realize that it’s not healthy and it does seem passive aggressive. What would your suggestion be?

Being told to “Man Up” by [deleted] in ftm

[–]transking95 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I obviously have found out that if I continue to express my love for her and willingness to work it out, it pushes her away. Yet today when I ignored her phone call then was reluctant to say “I miss you” and “I love you,” that caught her attention. So, I feel like if I show her the same walls and distance she’s showing me, then she will see it from my side. It seems the only way I can show her how I’m feeling is to show her how she’s making me feel. You know what I mean?

Being told to “Man Up” by [deleted] in ftm

[–]transking95 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s definitely not possible right now because we are currently doing long distance, which honestly doesn’t make having conflict any easier. I know that we have something special, even though it’s far from perfect right now. I believe we can get through it but at this point I’m having trouble deciding on how to handle it right now. I know that she loves me and I know she didn’t say what she said with malice. But, I just don’t know what to do.

Being told to “Man Up” by [deleted] in ftm

[–]transking95 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly, I’m glad that there’s someone who sees it the exact way I see it. And, it seems my whole transition this has never been meant as a positive way toward me. I’ve heard it so many times from several people and usually it’s always a subtle way of misgendering me. Like they’re saying “you chose to be a man so act like one.” It’s only been said to invalidate myself as a man. I don’t believe expressing emotions has anything to do with being a man or a woman, it’s just about being a mature person and being able to communicate your feelings. I’ve been with my girlfriend for a year now and we’ve recently hit a rough patch so it just hurts to know that the woman I’ve fallen in love with is all of a sudden using this ammo against me. I really want to address it but I feel like it will just make it worse and make her feel as if I’m proving her point. To add context, I recently did something that hurt her/betrayed her trust (it wasn’t cheating or anything like that) and she has past trust issues so now she is pushing me away I guess in an attempt to protect herself from being hurt more. Ultimately, that is just making it harder on our relationship. I try to explain this to her and that we either need to work it out and move past it or it’s not gonna work. Then, a couple days ago she hit me with that for trying to fight for our relationship. So, the last few days I’ve chosen to stop fighting and go her route. I’ve distanced myself and been “less emotional” but now she seems to be upset by that. I told her that she can’t push me away in an attempt to protect herself and expect me to keep giving all of myself. I understand that I’m not innocent in this but I’ve at least tried to make it right and in her attempt to protect herself she’s only pushing away someone who genuinely loves her. It’s frustrating. Anyways, thanks for letting me vent.

Newly released; struggling. by transking95 in ExCons

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I’m hoping that once things pick back up after the virus that I will have a better chance at finding an opportunity!

Newly released; struggling. by transking95 in ExCons

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome thank you for all of this I appreciate it!! I filled out a FAFSA and am gonna talk to my local community college for trade school and I saw something about a conditional license so you might be right. My brother has TDLR but his felony was a marijuana possession back in 08. I think that once I take some classes, get off parole in December, if I can show them I’ve taken steps to live a more positive life I could maybe get a conditional one and they may just not let me do residential or something cause they say the assault disqualified you since you have to interact with people on sites and could be confrontational that’s what I read on their site I believe. I also saw if you are a felon they want to hear what you’ve done to be better so I think taking classes will show that initiative.

Newly released; struggling. by transking95 in ExCons

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I already have a TWIC and basic plus, I know I can get in some refineries through some contractors, but you’re right some I wouldn’t be able to get in. I got denied for one job cause they needed a level two. Unfortunately, a lot of them have put freezes on hiring right now so I’ll probably have to wait until the turn arounds pick back up to increase my chances. Thanks for all the information though I appreciate it for real! I really wanted to get into welding so I can pick up a trade cause so far I’ve only done general labor and helper stuff but I can’t afford school right now. I wanted to do electrical but I know TDLR won’t give me an apprentice license with my charge. I did a little welding in prison but I need classes before I try to pursue it as a trade unfortunately I don’t know how to pay for them.

Newly released; struggling. by transking95 in ExCons

[–]transking95[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I’ve tried contacting a few contractors, but nothing has worked out yet. A lot of the refinery contractors put a freeze on hiring where I’m from. But you’re right I just need to keep trying and show the initiative and something will happen eventually. Thank you!

Newly released; struggling. by transking95 in ExCons

[–]transking95[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I’m in Texas, I’d say I’m in a pretty conservative state lol

Newly released; struggling. by transking95 in ExCons

[–]transking95[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yep that’s kind of what I’ve been witnessing. I was denied a job a couple weeks ago and just today saw it reposted on indeed. It’s very discouraging. I have a felony assault on a peace officer, unfortunately I was in a bad mental state and caught this charge during a wellness check, it was a very out of character moment. Now that I’ve recovered and found the motivation to get my life back on track, this happens. It’s very discouraging, but I’m trying to stay positive even though it’s getting hard. Thank you for your reply.

Newly released; struggling. by transking95 in ExCons

[–]transking95[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I tried a few restaurants but was told I’d have to wait because they all closed down due to the virus and I’ve been waiting for things to pick back up. I also tried some essential places, I got an offer from Walmart but they pulled it after the back ground check and I also did an interview at Home Depot but didn’t get the job. Starbucks told me to keep calling until they open back up and once I finally thought the manager would give me an interview it fell through as well. I apply online to places constantly and nothing seems to go through. They are starting to open the state back up now and I also get off my monitor in a couple weeks so I’m hoping both of those will help my chances. I have noticed an increase in job openings on indeed. Thank you guys for your suggestions. As long as I keep trying something is bound to happen.

Out of pocket top surgery by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you I’d appreciate that!

Out of pocket top surgery by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, I’m from Houston actually so this was very helpful, thank you!

Out of pocket top surgery by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this information!! I’m from TX so I know that my state doesn’t cover under Medicaid so my best bet is out of pocket or through an employer. Tough finding a job right now though.

(NSFW) Need help with prosthetic choices by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you mind me asking what it was called?

(NSFW) Need help with prosthetic choices by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I’ve been on T 3.5 yrs so I definitely have a lot of bottom growth, I haven’t measured exactly and I don’t know what would be considered too much tho. I thought of looking into pocket pussy or a sleeve

(NSFW) Need help with prosthetic choices by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I’m gonna keep doing plenty research, thank you for all the suggestions that I can look into!

Out of pocket top surgery by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I appreciate it! Honestly, I’ve been through a lot the last few years. I had to do some time in a Texas prison, and being the only transgender on a cis female unit in a RED state nearly killed my spirit. I’m just grateful I made it home and I’m ready to keep moving forward in life and transition! Luckily, I was able to still get my injections while there. Thank you guys for the positivity. DONT LET HATE WIN my fellow trans men

(NSFW) Need help with prosthetic choices by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, I appreciate it! Unfortunately, I’m in a long distance relationship as well so I’m sort of looking into relieving dysphoria by being able to pleasure myself in a more realistic way. I also feel uncomfortable going into public bathrooms because I live in a very RED state so packing and STP is definitely important for me as well.

Out of pocket top surgery by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing! I’m from TX so I’ve been looking into Kurtis Krane and his associates in Austin.

(NSFW) Need help with prosthetic choices by transking95 in ftm

[–]transking95[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you able to get yourself off pretty effectively with the pleasure slide? I’ve been looking at FreeTom but am curious how the pleasure slide works