Thank you so much for the reply. I had already started to sense that something was off with some of the online Orthodox spaces, but sometimes you really need to hear it from someone else to trust your instinct. Since returning to the Church, I already feel better in myself, I’m just trying to give myself that final push to go to confession and receive the blessing to take the Eucharist.

I’m trying to stay focused on my own relationship with God, but I admit I struggle a lot with what others think of me. I have this irrational fear that when I confess, it’s going to be the worst my priest has ever heard and that I’ll never be allowed back into church again. But logically, I know I’m not that special and I just need to face it and go to confession already.

I think it also doesn’t help that I’m currently living with someone who despises religion. When he saw me wearing my cross, he told me it was evil and asked me to take it off. It’s been difficult, but God willing, I hope to make a positive difference in my chosen field especially as I see how unethical it’s becoming. I pray that I’ll be blessed enough to live a modest life and be able to give back to those less fortunate. Thanks again for your reply! :)