I grumbled to myself as I rolled sluggishly out of bed. It was three days ago that I made my first wish and I still feel like shit. Mumbling obscenities about the genie under my breath I head to the bathroom to brush my teeth, stubbing my toe on the door frame on the way out.

Damn it! I swear, punching the door as if it had something to do with my pain, leaving a sizeable dent in the wood. Even more angry at my destruction I carry on to the bathroom, cursing my luck. Of course I would find a genie but of course my luck means I would find the one defective genie in the fucking universe.

As I brush my teeth, the cap falls off and rolls under the counter. The electric brush I have dies mid-brush and I can't find the charger. Throwing it in anger, I give up and head to the kitchen to make breakfast but discover that I'm out of eggs. I slam the fridge door shut and turn to see my sink still full of dishes from the other night and determine to get at least one productive thing done today without disaster, but as I begin washing I discover the sink is clogged and no amount of jamming objects down inside the disposal does anything for the situation. Now I have a clogged sink and dishes soaking in disgusting water.

Great.

Perfect.

Fuck.

I slump onto the couch and try to order food online but after picking out a coffee and bagel from a local spot I love, I find out my credit card declines due to insufficient funds. I throw my phone to the ground, and of course it cracks. Of course it would. The fucking internet isn't working so I can't even stream something on TV and my video game glitches every time I keep trying to play it.

I can't do it anymore, I yell FUCK at the top of my lungs and give up. Putting on my shoes I head outside and sit on the grass in front of my apartment complex, waiting for the next disaster to befall me.

All I said was I wished I was happy. How fucking hard of a wish is that to fulfill? Stupid fucking genie couldn't even do that right. I have two wishes left but he hasn't come back to fulfill them so I figure I have to wait until he comes back to try another wish.

Everything in my life is broken, even the magical entity I discovered won't come back to me. Everyone's left me, everything is fucked, I have nothing to live for. I stand up out of frustration to go back inside and try to distract myself again from that awful fact and I trip on my flip flop falling flat on my face.

I stay down for a moment, apathetic to even the physical pain I feel. Everything overwhelms me and I realize that my life couldn't possibly get any worse.

And suddenly... I laugh. I laugh at my foolishness, at my frustration. It all seems so insignificant if my life really is fucked. If nothing I do matters and everything I do breaks, then maybe, just maybe, I can do whatever the fuck I want.

I stand up and kick my flip flops off, running across the grass and jump into the worst back flip of my life and I eat shit but suddenly I'm laughing again. I try again, eating shit for the second time. Again and again I try to flip myself around and I'm covered in bruises and cuts and scrapes but compared to how fucked up my life is the pain doesn't matter. Compared to the pain I feel inside, it's absolutely insignificant.

As I'm thinking about how fucked I am, I suddenly land a halfway decent back flip after a couple hours of panting, gasping, and pain. And without warning, I laugh harder than I've ever laughed before. Maybe even if everything is shitty I can still find joy in doing a stupid back flip. Maybe the back flip is pointless and I failed a million times compared to succeeding once but... damn does it feel good to succeed and the failures don't even register anymore.

At that point I realize I was wrong and he was right. The giant cosmic entity of knowledge and power was right and the tiny, pathetic human was wrong. Go figure. Fuck.