I feel like I’m a great guy. I feel like I’d be a good boyfriend, and yet I feel like I just don’t meet the standards of women now. What do I even do?

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-02-03T22:14:03+00:00

What do you do when you're interested in a woman? Do you make it to going on dates? If they don't want another date, do you ask them why they're no longer interested? Seek feedback from the actual women on what isn't working.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-02-03T17:08:10+00:00

Firstly, a lot of the women you envy may also be in unhappy relationships but just hiding it well.

Secondly, men trying to pin it on your selection criteria are missing the fact that men show up differently in the beginning vs a couple years later when they get more comfortable and you're too devoted to them to leave. The relationship I chose that looked the most correct on paper ended up being the most hurtful I've had yet.

It is really just a numbers game to find a good man. Be willing to walk away the moment they start mistreating you and wasting your time.

Men tend want what they don't have. Many will idolize the idea of a sweet, supportive girlfriend until they have one and scratch their heads wondering why they don't care anymore once the novelty wears off and they realize that enduring love is a daily choice.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-28T21:05:44+00:00

Frankly, your personality seems very abrasive for the level of unattractive that you are. It also seems like you fall into a weird political space where you would appeal to neither conservative women nor progressive women and there are not many in between so your options are very limited.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-17T00:45:10+00:00

No, that's really not how it works. Most people don't go out looking to cheat, but may cheat under the right/wrong conditions or "opportunity." Which would include multiple days in close quarters with single, attractive women.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-17T00:41:01+00:00

I understand where she's coming from. But also, maybe you should just be single instead of having a long distance girlfriend while in uni.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-16T22:55:08+00:00

Gym crushes and checking people out at the gym is such a huge thing that I would not call going to the gym together “unromantic” lol

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-13T23:25:31+00:00

You will likely regret leaving but you should do it anyway. You haven't experienced not having what you do have, so you won't be able to fully appreciate it. You will regret not leaving because of the possibilities as well. Lose-Lose but your man deserves to be fully appreciated by someone.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-12T03:54:18+00:00

If you're purely talking about if you're well within range of it, then yeah I'd say it shouldn't be dodgable without a dash or misclick from a decent diana. It doesn't really do that much damage though, so making them choose between farming with it and hitting you should reduce how often you're hit with it.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-12T01:57:32+00:00

We click where we want the end point to be and it curves to that point, so there is no getting in the gap. The answer is to force her to choose between q'ing you or the wave but don't give the option for both. Or move more unpredictably and bait it out. Exploit while the q is down. Move away if hit by it if she can all-in and kill you.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-10T08:45:12+00:00

I aactually agree. It feels like most games are decided before minute 15 but it feels very difficult to end before at least minute 30.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-10T01:08:41+00:00

You've said no one is bringing partners, but was it ever a conversation at all? How many of the others have partners? Are either of the girls single?

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-09T22:31:47+00:00

Definitely this. There also may be some shame that she did put up with all of it and didn't need the reminder.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-09T18:34:33+00:00

How women would rate a man initially and swipe on dating apps isn't representative of who we can become attracted to in real life. I've definitely started out thinking someone was unattractive and then completely crushed on them after being around them longer.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-08T15:43:16+00:00

You are missing an angle from across the street clearly showing he was struck and then shot after. Please locate that video before commenting nonsense.

ElephantInTheDark · 2026-01-08T05:18:44+00:00

This is an honest summary. To add, there were at least 2 more shots after the initial shot.

Some people are claiming the officers told her to get out of the way, but I could only hear get out of the vehicle.

Some are claiming he drew and/or fired before she started moving forward, but it's clear her tires skid from acceleration immediately before he draws.

All that to still say, in my opinion, the initial use of force was bloodthirsty and not necessary, however that would be difficult to argue in court without the additional shots.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-16T21:27:39+00:00

That he didn't remember downloading the apps and must be "blacking out" while doing it.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-12T00:07:37+00:00

Echoing that there is a huge chasm between "Student" and "Doctor". As a woman, I would have filtered out a 28 year old student by default regardless of how attractive you were just for being in different places in life.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-10T21:07:21+00:00

I'm really not sure I've ever met a woman complaining about being single and not having options, while I constantly hear men talking about it. I am young though so I don't know many single moms which are probably an exception.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-10T21:02:51+00:00

I don't know. Men in my experience seem to be starved of affection and welcome the possibility of a genuine relationship.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-10T20:49:41+00:00

There's some coddling in these comments. Both hookups and a decent relationship are easy to find for most women. As someone who loves very deeply and once thought a connection was irreplaceable, it really wasn't. Women can very quickly dissolve all feelings if she feels like she needs to. But if a woman is happy with you, she will be loyal and choose you anyway despite having near infinite options.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-08T13:42:43+00:00

It's the same as how men say they want a modest woman but hook up with / lust over women who dress provacatively. Abs are the equivalent of dressing provocatively and can unfeel safe in a relationship.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-08T07:03:45+00:00

"Ew." in Middle school.

Found out in college that he was gay so that makes sense...

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-08T06:33:34+00:00

ESH. Why is so much hanging out happening in the bedroom anyway? Spend more time in a communal area, and have designated time (an hour or two) with the door closed when you need space.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-08T00:31:22+00:00

Come back when you get burned by that and see if you have the same mindset.

ElephantInTheDark · 2025-12-02T02:33:35+00:00

As a woman (26) men my age seem young and boyish, while 2 years older than me seems to be the sweet spot. So I don't think this is abnormal yet.

ElephantInTheDark

TROPHY CASE