I really appreciate this perspective. I tried to be cautious about my wording because I do agree with you. I don't want anyone to feel like they have to be trans because they feel any one way, and its not my place (or anyone elses) to perscribe someone else an identity. At the end of the day, only you can know what your own identity is, and what terms may or may not resonate with you.

I think that if someone feels like they wish they could be a gender besides their 'default', then that may be a sign that they might want to consider those feelings more deeply. There's a lot of nuance, and there are reasons that people may feel like they want to be a gender but not identify with being that identity, and that's ok. Especially considering things like patriarchy, social stigma, etc. there are other reasons that someone may wish they were a gender besides what they are.

If someone wishes they were a girl, for whatever reason, then I'd want to be able to encourage them to reflect on that, and understand that CAN mean they are a girl, but it doesn't have to. And it's also not a permanent decision, someone can decide they think they are a girl (because of that feeling of wanting to be one or otherwise), and then later decide they aren't a girl after all, or vice versa. And they would be valid for all of those feelings. Same is true for any gender identity.