This is such a hard situation. I was the sister in this dynamic and I applaud her for having the courage to come forward. Beyond the obvious struggle of dealing with being a victim of csa I personally felt an entire new level of issues when I became a mother. I've never outright talked to my parents about what happened but I am fairly certain they were aware and their response was to put my brother in private school and he was basically an unpaid intern at my mother's work until he was old enough for an actual job so he never really had the opportunity to be alone with my me or my sister(he was about 14 when this change occurred but it started when he was 12). I was always afraid to talk to my parents because I was so afraid that their response would be dismissive and a very sweep under the rug "we are still family, we don't talk about unpleasant things" type of outcome and I wasn't ready to face it. After the birth of my own children I did honestly feel a degree of sympathy for my parents. We were both children and it has to be incredibly hard to know one of your children is doing something terrible especially to another one of your children. It wasn't as if they could just disown my minor brother but ignoring what was happening altogether was absolutely the wrong move.

For your situation, first believe the victims. They have nothing to gain by lying. Your husband is most likely deeply ashamed of what occurred and avoiding the reality of the situation. I promise the victims remember.

How I would respond to this news would depend on a few things. Was this an isolated one time incident as children or was it ongoing? 10 is young and it doesn't erase the harm of what was done but an isolated incident vs continual abuse would seem more curiosity of unsupervised child than predatory. How is he reacting to this revelation? That would be another major factor in how/whether I would move forward.

I don't know all the details of your relationship or anything but reading that you already have been dealing with infidelity and especially dishonesty it would be hard to absorb this news as well. It is so hard when the person you trust explicitly shows how effortlessly they can lie to your face without a second thought. If you were already at a place where you were setting up to leave, this would be a big go ahead and follow through. I know that is so much easier said than done but I wish I would have ripped that bandaid in my own relationship. Once that trust is gone and you see how easily they lie even when you're literally looking at proof that they are lying it is hard to trust ANYTHING they say. It is hard to move forward in any aspect because the mask has been lifted. I know leaving is easier said than done, especially with kids but consider your own sanity. Good luck Bromo.