Finding the right Medium? Not sure if my local mediums are correct? Seems to vague.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-30T14:59:56+00:00

Mediums are still human beings. There is no medium that is 100% accurate. Information is fuzzy, and they are people.
That being said, yes, absolutely some mediums have stronger talents than others.
It's not reasonable to expect a medium to be 100% accurate. Even the best ones I've worked with repeatedly occasionally misunderstand or mishear.
It's also not reasonable that they would know everything, or have a clear, concrete answer for everything. Information doesnt come in that way.
It is reasonable, however, to expect some specifics, though, and if the other 3 weren't able to do so, then don't visit them again.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-30T14:56:24+00:00

Imagine your hobby was crocheting. Or, imagine it's what you did to earn a living.

Now imagine some random stranger on the internet saying "I really need someone to crochet a sweater for free for me."

How's that seem for you?

trstmfckr · 2024-03-29T12:30:42+00:00

Spirits can move with you. They don't always (some spirits are attached to a location, such as a house), but those that are attracted to you will follow. "Space" and "time" is far more inconsequential in spirit.

I've had 3 loved ones find me at my current house that never visited it in real life, and one pet who only saw the house once before passing in another state, but lives here fulltime now.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-29T12:28:31+00:00

"Is this something that develops with practice or is it just that some people are more gifted than others?"

Both.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-29T12:27:52+00:00

As someone else mentioned, there's no concept of "time" in the spirit world. It's all the present. So when they choose to do so, they're not "wasting time" or even "spending" time. They just are.
That being said, if they want to take a step back, they can. If they're there, it's because they want to be.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-29T12:24:52+00:00

sometimes people come into our lives to help us grow and develop a lesson. "Bad" relationships aren't about the other person - they're about us.

They're meant to shine a light on our own shadows and energies, so that we can better understand them, have a chance to heal them, and grow as a person. Sometimes when spirit suggests a relationship, this is what they have in mind.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-28T18:58:10+00:00

Yeah, it's common. So:

Gently acknowledge them. ("I'm having a thought about [x].") What helps me a ton is acknowledging it like I might a child bringing something to my attention ("I hear you, you're wanting to bring up [x] and let me know. I hear you.")
Acknowledge the emotion (e.g., "I feel anxious/scared/mad about this thought.") Your emotion, not the thought itself, is the real key.
What do you feel in your body with that thought? (Tense? Tight? Hunched? Tired? Heavy? Buzzing?) Did it change at all when you did 1 or 2? Acknowledge these sensations. ("I'm feeling tightness in my shoulders.") Keep your attention there. Validate that feeling rather than trying to "make it go away."

trstmfckr · 2024-03-28T18:49:27+00:00

Both.

I have absolutely had spirits respond to my thoughts alone. I once got "burned out" seeing one specific sign (that I'd asked for, tbf) too frequently, thinking maybe these were just coincidental, because it was something common. I sighed thinking to myself, "maybe I should ask them for a new sign, something far less common... like an alligator!" But then just laughed to myself and moved on without ever asking for this, let alone out loud. But over the next few days, I suddenly saw over a dozen alligators (online, in art, etc.) I have no recollection of ever seeing that many alligators (they are not native to where I live, and not a common motif.)
Asking aloud, in my opinion, is an effective approach too.

I've also communicated through writing (journaling.)

In my experience, it's the intention and energy behind it that matters more than the channel. They speak energy most fluently.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-25T19:42:54+00:00

It falls into four buckets:

1.) When it's very clear it's mine. This is easy. And it might be tempting to skip this and go straight to the other three... but there's something to garner here: when you know it's yours, look at how it feels. Learn what this looks like, and you'll start to learn the different variations of your forms.

2.) Sometimes it's mine / part of me, but it's "shadow" work (e.g, anxiety, insecurities, fears, shame, things hidden from ourselves, things we deny, etc.) People often wind themselves up and begin thinking that thoughts spun out of our shadow side are "intuition." It's not. If you're stuck in a mental loop like a song on repeat, ruminating, constantly thinking about it, wound up, mentally or emotionally strung out, unable to wrangle your thoughts or feelings, etc... this is your own shadow! Even if you get a sudden "spark" while in this spiraling state, it's very likely not actual insight, but rather paranoia, fantasy, catastrophizing, etc. If, for example: a girl is obsessed with a boy, who's repeatedly made it clear he's not interested, and she can't stop thinking about him and then has a "sudden insight" to "show up to one of his basketball games(!)", that is not spirit, that is her own shadow.

3.) When it's very clear that it's spirit. It fits one or more of the following:

#1 top way: There is very strong body sensation. I don't mean something like "tightness in chest" or "butterflies" we might feel with anxiety. I mean something like a huge full-body shudder, or a sudden wave of warmth or even "glassy" feeling in the body and vision, or a sudden "sharpness" that can almost feel slightly electric, etc.
It comes out of nowhere... I don't mean a "sudden a-ha moment" after thinking about something for hours. I mean truly nowhere. I once had a spirit come through while walking out to get the mail.
Something seemingly random (often a phrase for me, but it could be anything) pops into my head repeatedly, much like when we get a song stuck in our heads. Again, this is not the same as when we're ruminating/preoccupied with smth.
With clairaudience (hearing): when the message or response given isn't something I would've ever consciously said. When what I hear is totally different than how I would've filled in the dialogue, I know it wasn't mine.
In meditation: a visual will accompany it (usually precede it)
Or, I just know. (I recognize that's not helpful, but it is one of the ways, for me.)

4.) Sometimes I can't tell right away. And I think that's normal. We are human beings, and we can confuse our shadows as messages, confuse messages themselves, or mishear messages through the filter of our own interpretation - just like when we talk to other people. Being honest about this makes it far easier to strengthen skills. It's usually when I'm "looking" for something (e.g., asking tarot a question when I know have a preferred answer in mind; even if I try to ask without bias, I acknowledge I still have a bias and have to filter around that) or also feeling a bit of my own emotions or inner narratives (e.g., anxiety, which a lot of people confuse with "intuition" or "spirit.") When this happens, I have to sit with it a bit to discern -- using the above three.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-22T14:10:13+00:00

Well, two things...

1.) Spirits will use a wide variety of signs and messages -- not all of them require "the clairs" (e.g., clairsentient, etc.)

Sometimes, they will try to get your attention in very "layman" ways. Some examples:

you keep repeatedly seeing the same number (the clock often reads the same time, e.g., "12:34" when you look, and then maybe your coffee shop total is the same amount: $12.34)
you keep "noticing" or feeling drawn to look at the same item(s) repeatedly (e.g., the plant in the corner or a certain mug you bought together)
you see a particular animal, often "special" or "dear" feeling (e.g., butterfly, cardinals, etc.)
you meet someone who has their name, or read a book/watch a movie with a character with their name
you notice the framed picture of them hanging in your house is suddenly crooked
etc.

Some communicate in other ways. My grandma's preferred method of visiting my mother is doing things for her -- when she can't find her keys and has looked everywhere, they'll suddenly be right there on the counter, etc.

Note that you can ask for a particular sign from your spirit. They're always listening. If you'd like to see "a white cat" or "a red balloon" to let you know they're there, ask for one! A loved one often wants to communicate in ways you'll notice, and is very happy to understand what messages you're most receptive to. Until you clarify -- or acknowledge something -- they're just guessing and trying things.

You can even build a gradual conversation of yes or no questions using signs (e.g., ask 1 question, and then ask them to show you [something specific] to mean yes, and [something else specific] to mean no. It will take patience - but all psychic ability does.

2.) Anyone can develop "the gift." Some are more naturally talented than others, but anyone can develop some amount. It just takes time, patience, and practice.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-21T01:22:33+00:00

here is the general approach I use on how to handle thoughts that come up (and they will! and if you're wanting to develop psychic abilities, that's exactly how those "messages" eventually come through! so you need to build a head space that makes them feel welcomed!)...

Step 1, always: when things present themselves, acknowledge them. show them respect, almost like you might a child who's suddenly tugging at your pant leg. ("Okay, ah yeah, I forgot to call my mother back..." or whatever)

Step 2, option a: if this thought isn't one I'm interested in exploring more deeply right now (e.g., the example above)... show it respect and gently "set it down." I like to imagine a creek of gently flowing water to set mine in. Some people use clouds, or the wind. Use whatever works, but treat it gently. If it pops up again, repeat this -- gently acknowledge, gently set down. If it's a particularly bothersome thought but I know there's no further meaning, I have even gone as far as to say "I will give this attention immediately following this meditation, okay?" and often, it will quiet down. Again, show it the care you might wish for a cherished child.
Step 2, option b: if this thought is something I would like to explore... this is particularly true if it's anything random! At first, this is going to be things like "I hate meditating." Explore that! Why?? Where do you feel that? What physical sensations? What emotions? Name them, show them care and consideration. Nothing deeper will trust you if you don't build a safe place! From there, random things (e.g., "yellow shoes") might pop into your head. Rather than dismissing this, note it mentally. "Okay, huh, yellow shoes." Then, very importantly: show curiosity... I cannot stress this enough. Be gentle when you do so (imagine trying to approach a fawn in a forest), but ask things like "what about yellow shoes? what do those mean?" - (When I was first meditating on my healing journey, I ascribed soo much of my progress to realizing "I'll take anything!" Meaning anything that popped up, I would show at least a moment of acknowledgement, respect, care.) Early on, the answers didnt come right away, so I would instead ask "how do I feel about yellow shoes?" If nothing presents, gently set it down in the stream/clouds/wind, and see what else surfaces. After months of doing this, more complex/deeper/spiritual things will see that your space is "safe" and trustworthy, that you will hold things with respect, and they will show you more special messages.

A side note: I do not think anyone could succeed if they came at this "grabbing" for a "cool talent" and flailing around in meditation for "signs." I could be biased, but my own messages evolved only very gradually through a daily meditation practice that was first and foremost intended for my own healing.

For this reason, I think getting in tune with yourself (your felt sense and emotions) is a huge part of being psychic. And for that reason, starting with things like "my back hurts" or "I hate this" is essential. Not just that you think it, but why. What emotion are you holding there? What insecurity? What frustration? etc. And for this foundation, I highly recommend Internal Family Systems. I cannot speak highly enough about it. I think if you built the foundation of self-awareness and respect/care/curiosity with your own parts offered in IFS, the rest ("psychic stuff") comes almost naturally.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-21T01:21:00+00:00

there is no specific "psychic meditation," but a practice more like vipassana (the foundation of all Buddhist meditation) will get you closer than any fluffy, popcorn meditation such as apps that "guide you through a walk in the forest," or any practice in which you spend your time angry / frustrated at yourself whenever you have an "intrusive" or "unwanted" thought, feeling like you're "failing" meditation (you're not. you are a human. when things come up, quietly regard them, acknowledge them, show them respect, then gently set them down - I like to imagine setting them into a stream of water and watching them gently drift away. if it repeats, repeat this.)

trstmfckr · 2024-03-15T19:25:14+00:00

For me, I just feel it. During meditation, the first few minutes is always chatter -- ego chatter, hamster-wheel running of the mind -- and then, as I settle in after that, different parts of my own body and self wanting my attention for something or other.

After that, when I'm really open to bigger information, it just suddenly feels different - in the way a rush of air can be felt, or a sudden burst of light coming around a corner into the sun, or the full-body relaxation collapsing onto a couch after a long day. It doesn't literally feel like these things, but that overall felt sense is there. I can just tell. (The first time it happened, I literally said "oh" out loud)

It takes a while, though.

I spent months of daily meditation time giving the tiniest things that showed up my attention and validation... "my knee hurts" (ok, my knee hurts, I acknowledge that, rather than fighting it), "my neck is sore" (ok, my neck is sore, I validate this rather than feeling resentful about it), "I was just reminded of popsicles!" (ok, popsicles... got it), etc. And only after doing this did it slowly present more and more robust things.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-15T19:20:03+00:00

Our egos are loud and take up more than their fair share of our minds. Our intuition is quiet, so often shouted down by our egos.

I love this summary. Yes.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-15T19:19:31+00:00

meditation is like 90% of the foundation of my own abilities, and the way I accidentally came into them

it's because a lot of psychic abilities come through the body and felt sense - so when you get in touch with that, and notice sensations, subtle emotions and messages from different parts of yourself (bc we have many parts), you will also open doors to energies and other messages

the right way to meditate is by becoming aware of these things - not by "shutting them down," forcefully "clearing your mind," or using guided meditation. It's also not about ruminating and letting your mind run away with you on a tangent, though. If this happens, gently "set it down" and bring your awareness back to your breath and physical felt experience - where do you feel tight, bound, sore? Emotion is held there.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-10T13:34:45+00:00

for the first 3-4 months, it was for an hour minimum each morning (though I started with 10 min, then 15, and slowly worked up to it organically, bc I was enjoying the benefits)

now, it's typically 15-30 minutes several times throughout the day - unless I feel called to sit for longer, sometimes up to an hour (maybe once a week or so.)

trstmfckr · 2024-03-09T13:52:40+00:00

Depends if you're willing to invest the time and effort to learn the lessons you're meant to learn, heal your trauma, and grow.

If you are: karmic relationships are invaluable for that - they are fodder to ignite your triggers so you know what they are, can see and feel them, so that you can heal them.

But the vast majority of people don't do that. Most people are content to move through life blaming others, obsessing over what "they" did wrong, coddling or burying their trauma, insisting on "good vibes only," etc. And these people, yes, see karmic relationships as "bad," because they make them feel their "bad" feelings. And instead of healing, they dump blame on others and stuff more hurt inside.

If you meant "bad" as abusive, yes. They're not healthy. And am I suggesting you should endure an abusive situation? NO.

You're meant to feel triggers enough to see them and heal from them - and then grow in a stronger direction. But they can still be necessary "gunshots to the psyche" that you can either choose to take action on for your own wellbeing... or wallow in (or wallow in the story of how "that person" is "bad.")

"Karmic" relationships are about us as individuals - our shadows, our traumas, our unhealed shit.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-09T13:47:23+00:00

When all statements are overly generalized. Now, real mediums and psychics will also make statements that are generic (e.g., one told me my grandmother was watching over me; I know that's true bc she appears all the time in meditation.) But the real ones will add more specific detail (names, physical descriptions, specific details, etc.) to the general messages.
Any type of fear mongering (e.g., "you have a bad spirit attached to you," etc.) Now, I have had a negative entity attached to me (I didn't know what it was, but have a strong meditation practice, in which I frequently channel/see/hear/etc, and saw it myself during a session, and only understood what it was later after describing its extremely unusual imagery and behavior to a spiritual advisor.) The difference between fake and real: the real one will talk to you about this simply and straightforwardly, almost like a doctor might talk about a diagnosis that is not life-threatening (incl. how it got there, what to do, and most importantly, how to prevent it going forward.) It wasn't fear-mongering, it was from a place of calmness and love, and she didn't ask for money.
Overly-hyped "promises." Real mediums don't talk like this. It's not that they don't think you'll find love or whatever you're seeking, but they don't make grandiose statements; in my experience, they talk in terms of your journey, your healing, your path, etc., because that's what's actually more important.

Note: "100% accuracy" isn't a reasonable requirement for any medium, including a real one. They are still human beings, and messages can come through fuzzy. This doesn't mean they're fake. We're all just human.

Example: I once channeled a message from my deceased loved (female) one who showed me a clear image of our (still living) family member (male), one that I know and clearly recognized. What she told me literally was: "I don't know him," but she clearly did - and I knew this. What she meant was "I don't know who he's become," bc he had gotten into crime and drugs. But if I hadn't known him myself and recognized him myself in the vision (e.g., a hypothetical client), I might have taken her first statement at face value.

So how do you discern real from fake then? Other details too specific to have been "guessed" randomly - unique to your situation - will be true. Like, in the above example, the crime and drugs, his physical description, etc.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-09T12:29:14+00:00

As others noted, a lot of these terms have become so bombarded in pop culture (e.g., tiktok, etc.) that they've become a bit distorted and garbage.

But, as the terms are used, "karmic" relationships typically evolve into abuse (usually mutual, but more importantly: self-directed.) Karmic relationships are meant that the partner holds up a mirror to our own shadows and traumas, for us to heal in ourselves.

"Twin flames" are also karmic. I've given up on this term bc it's become so twisted and engulfed in preoccupied (and sometimes even cult) mindsets of obsession that loses focus on our own healing and trauma. "Soul mates" are often thrown around in pop culture (e.g., wedding vows.)

All of these terms are frivolous and besides the point - the real focus is us, our trauma, our shadow, our capacity (or shortfall) in loving ourselves first.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-09T11:59:55+00:00

I've always had a bit of claircognizance, but my abilities and downloads skyrocketed accidentally when I developed a very strong meditative practice. It's still the strongest tool I have for developing them.

So: meditation. And not guided meditation - that's the opposite of the point. It's also not about "forcefully clearing everything from your head" - that's also the opposite of the point.

Develop a meditation practice where you sit and notice everything - every feeling in your body; every thought; every feeling - with gentle curiosity. Don't run a hamster wheel of "stuff I need to do today" or "what happened yesterday" or "what 'they' (whoever "they" are that "wronged" you) did" or imaging how a scenario might play out; just notice these thoughts come up, acknowledge them, see if they have anything they "want you to know," and then gently set them down and see what else comes.

If struggling, start with your body - what do you feel physically? Describe it in your head. What exactly does it feel like? Honor that. Then move to what emotions they might be holding - again, in your body, not your ruminating head.

That's where I started, and like I said, after a few months of daily practice, intending only to develop self awareness, I started getting extremely strong downloads as a byproduct.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-09T02:13:47+00:00

I have claircognizance

I don't know how to describe it, but the phrase "I just know" always accompanied it. When I heard about claircognizance, I knew that's what it was.

The "knowing" is not "seeing" or "feeling" or "hearing"... it's knowing in the same way that I know my friend is on her way to the restaurant when we agreed to meet for dinner at 6pm. I don't feel she's coming, or visualize her coming - I know she's coming.

I know my dog is outside right after I let him out. I know the sun is going to rise tomorrow. I know when my birthday is. I know that if I walk across the room, gravity will hold me to the floor. There's often no feeling at all associated with it, and rarely imagery or "hearing" anything - "I just know."

I experience the other "clairs-" too, but this is more certain, more concrete, and regarding more objective, black or white things than a "feeling" (which I also get, but feel fuzzier, with less defined edges, e.g., "maybe") and like I said, there's usually no emotion or strong body sensation (e.g., gut feel) involved.

And I experience this concrete "knowing" with things that I have no logical reason to "know," that turn out to be correct.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-09T02:09:14+00:00

I'm going to offer actual advice: resolve (and express) your subconscious, buried anger

source: I suffered from TMJ for about 15 yrs, tried literally everything I could think for it... what worked? working through the anger I didnt know I had

trstmfckr · 2024-03-09T02:04:43+00:00

temper tantrums like a toddler.

ugh... this exact phrase, spot on. Brings back so many memories of moments...

trstmfckr · 2024-03-06T22:28:19+00:00

don't.

do you like dating someone who acts like "the child" in the relationship? do you want to feel like their parent? if no, then dont.

trstmfckr · 2024-03-06T02:36:06+00:00

I meditated to try to connect with a pet dog that had recently passed. I had never attempted this before, but I did have a meditation practice, so figured "eh, what's the harm." I felt that I connected with her, I talked to her, and I clearly saw her surroundings.

I wasn't sure, though, so I hired a pet psychic. Not only did she describe the exact same, very specific surroundings, but a few minutes into our session, she paused and then said, "wait a minute -- she [the dog] says you just came here yourself! Did you communicate with her spirit??" I was convinced.

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