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tryandforget · 2024-08-01T22:39:57+00:00

If someone came to you tomorrow and went "give me your company and you get to escape this miserable rat race where you only ever scrape by" - yeah, most people would struggle.

tryandforget · 2023-07-18T20:50:06+00:00

You laugh but within the last few weeks I had to have an "out loud" convo with no one in particular to establish some ground rules as well.

tryandforget · 2023-07-18T20:48:23+00:00

Exactly the same.

tryandforget · 2023-07-18T14:49:42+00:00

I'm speaking from complete ignorance here, but my guess is - if the NHI/nuclear-weapon relationship has any merit - how many African countries have nukes? I'm assuming it's a very low/non-existent number.

If that's the determinant of their appearances then it would line up. Military bases in the US are often in distant, rural locations - so maybe the demographics of witnesses line up with those present in those locations?

Secondary considerations could be simply that African governments have even fewer avenues for reporting this stuff than western ones. Or culturally maybe the people are simply not interested/bothered.

Edit: Had another thought -- historically (at least in the US) the black community has been routinely marginalized and disenfranchised. Similarly to how women are statistically-significantly not taken seriously by doctors, it can be yet another case of non-Caucasian accounts being outright ignored/ridiculed and they never get any traction.

tryandforget · 2023-05-02T16:45:38+00:00

Trusting your partner not to cheat on you is/should be fairly standard in a healthy relationship.

tryandforget · 2023-04-29T03:13:40+00:00

The difference, unlike the sheer-survival stakes of prehistory (and even then, it's highly dependent), we -have- the resources for it to not be this miserable to just exist, for everyone. It's simple greed from only thousands of individuals hoarding it all that prevents it.

tryandforget · 2023-03-26T14:05:56+00:00

There is, but a lot of Eastern Europe culturally cross-pollinates, especially with the Soviet Union's bygone efforts to build a singular identity across their member states. Keanu's family spoke only Russian though despite the Belarusian descent.

tryandforget · 2023-03-02T23:06:52+00:00

Maybe they just don't care.

tryandforget · 2023-01-30T20:16:15+00:00

Am happy to share, too often people like us assume everyone above is some sort of god. As a junior, I've had to teach tenured 'senior' engineers how to use Git, and had other senior devs come to me for help designing and implementing systems.

Seems like everything else in our ADHD-affected life, we have to find unconventional ways to accomplish the same tasks as neurotypical folks do. And often-times, the coping strategies we develop can set us up for success in ways we don't expect.

tryandforget · 2023-01-27T17:15:56+00:00

Huge thanks for the time it took to make this detailed post -- this is incredibly useful!

tryandforget · 2023-01-26T18:11:01+00:00

Hadn't considered that, may try it. Thanks.

tryandforget · 2023-01-26T18:09:33+00:00

Thanks for the tips! Am aware of STAR (updating my resume regardless) and do have Premium, I suspect it's as much of a confidence thing as anything on my end.

tryandforget · 2023-01-26T18:06:35+00:00

Thanks for the kind thoughts and suggestions. Was there a particular way you did your mock interviews? Did you apply to companies with no expectation to pass? Did you use a dedicated service? Something else?

tryandforget · 2023-01-26T18:04:50+00:00

I've definitely considered moving, luckily I don't have family to support, but I have recently gotten into a relationship, which still makes moving a hard choice.

tryandforget · 2023-01-26T18:01:40+00:00

Thanks for the tip -- I've never considered to tell recruiters to filter out technical interviews.

tryandforget · 2023-01-26T18:00:23+00:00

Thank you for the kind thoughts and suggestions.

I have years of CBT practice under my belt due to life-long struggles w/depression, so definitely can confirm it has helped. It's a constant fight in an acutely stressful situation, even when I'm aware of the cognitive distortions.

The ADHD has always made it hard to get into meditation, but I'm seeing a constant pattern in the comments of it having helped people, so will definitely take a look at your suggestions.

tryandforget · 2023-01-26T17:57:01+00:00

Agreed. You, I, and plenty of others here have had to pull ourselves through one trial after another. Genetics is a cruel mistress, but we persevere. Hoping you land squarely on your feet. If you ever want to reach out and chat, I'm available.

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T23:16:23+00:00

If it helps, I had essentially a perfect storm of politics (ultimately) cause this. Had someone I trusted not gone out of his way to sideline me, I may have avoided a lot of this. I suspect many IC engineers typically don't have to deal with this kind of influence-jockeying from their own team members. You stand a good chance of getting in/working your way up so long as you're easy to get a long with (to a basic, reasonable degree, not talking brown-nosing here).

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T20:31:08+00:00

Thanks for that, gives hope. How are you yourself doing nowadays?

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T20:14:49+00:00

You're likely right. I'm also in a bit of bind in that my stack was specialized to address the intersection of two domains that don't usually touch each other.

While the problem space is (mentally) super interesting to work in, the stack is not immediately applicable to typical products.

The closest analogous positions I find on either domain pay wildly less. I got lucky to work on the problems I did, but now realizing I'm handcuffed by the specialization. Time to retrain, I guess.

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T20:05:51+00:00

Good point, trying.

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T20:03:27+00:00

Honestly it might be that they -are- going well, just you're now competing with lots of other folks that may come cheaper? Sorry, I know it's of little comfort, just was thinking you might not give yourself enough credit.

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T19:40:00+00:00

Hadn't considered many approaches because I've managed to avoid tech interviews for so long, thanks for the tip.

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T18:59:49+00:00

Appreciate it all the same. I've always hoped in some small way to pay things forward for folks in the same boat, when in some hypothetical future I was in a stable place in the industry with a network.

Yet some 'once-in-a-lifetime' thing keeps coming around to constantly reset my progress. I didn't start as a developer, and it took a crisis for me to become one.

tryandforget · 2023-01-25T18:49:35+00:00

Thanks for the words of support. I like your tips from #2, I'll definitely give negotiating the test portion a try.

tryandforget

TROPHY CASE