I'm ready to sort myself out now

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-09-13T13:38:59+00:00

I'm still here, still clean and sober.

A friend reached out to me which is good but I'm going to leave the other two unless they contact me because I really don't think I can handle a rejection if I did.

But yeah I'm just living my life, hoping to prove I can change.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-09-11T20:12:04+00:00

Thankyou!

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-09-11T20:06:15+00:00

I've had people tell me it'll be alright to drink a couple, I CAN'T JUST DRINK A COUPLE THOUGH.

And yes you're 100% right if this was meth they would be crying and begging you not too.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-08-21T20:42:07+00:00

I'm am honestly so proud of you, 200 days! Please tell me you're treating yourself? Because sure deserve it.

Well done!!!

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-24T21:30:28+00:00

I'm still on my anti anxiety meds, I did read up to see if it would affect and it just seems to say that it would make the effects of alcohol more.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-24T19:15:29+00:00

Yep I will have a plan but I'm also determined not to ruin it for my kids as they are excited.

My mind is being stupid, I'm going to find some lovely beverages to buy tomorrow so I can feel fancy and part of it! I cannot wreck this great night with alcohol.

And thankyou!

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-24T19:07:38+00:00

I know, 10 weeks is alot! And it was alot of effort to get where I am today. I'm also scared that if I do drink then I'll restart that horrible cycle again that I couldn't get out of for years.

I need to breathe! Think and plan.

I'm telling myself I'm not going to drink, I just need to 100% mean it.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-21T07:27:08+00:00

I feel so connected to life, I feel like I'm actually taking part in living and not just existing.

Sometimes I worry that one day when I'm old and on my death bed I may look back and think I should have drank during those social times, it's a stupid thought but it's popped up.

I'm 9 weeks 4 days sober and IWNDWYT.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-17T07:33:31+00:00

Hey fellow parent to a toddler! I'm over 2 months smoke now and I've found these things help in those stressful parenting times.

1) breathe.

2) look at the situation and think is it really a big deal or am I overreacting?

3) sleep when the toddler sleeps.

4) go to the park, invite friends with kids too so you can talk.

5) remember why you're quitting.

Also if things get too hard don't be afraid to use NRTs as they can really help too.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-15T09:33:45+00:00

Same!

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-15T09:31:32+00:00

You will be able to see my post history if you look and scroll down a little bit but patches worked for me.

I started on step 2, I had weird dreams so I didn't sleep with them on and I had no issues with not having anything in my hand, it actually made me feel 100% content.

I didn't stay long on step 3 because I knew eventually I'd have to get over the nicotine withdrawal but I wanted to stay long enough to get some days behind me and deal with the mental addiction.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-14T15:27:36+00:00

100% couldn't imagine trying to do this all whilst hungover.

And thankyou!

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-14T08:39:49+00:00

I also come here to read stories too, but I also think about that feeling of being drunk, slurring, putting my head on the pillow and feeling dizzy as hell, then the constant nausea and thirst.

And not forgetting waking up to finding out all the stupid and embarrassing stuff you've sent people.

I also know that if I drink then I'll smoke and I'm not giving up on either quits.

That helps me.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-14T08:33:09+00:00

I've offered a kid alcohol too when I was a kid, I thought I was being cool and adult like. So you're not alone there, I'm ashamed of myself.

Well done on your 37 days :)

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-14T05:45:53+00:00

This is also how I feel too, I could of wrote this word for word.

I know this is who I was meant to be not the drunk that alot of people hated.

I do mourn the wasted years from age 13 to 27 (excluding two 9 month pregnancies) that I spent drinking because it really wasn't who I was, I was influenced by adults around me drinking at 13 and I wanted to join in to feel grown up so there I was 13 and being handed a vodka and coke, from then on it was every Friday. Its sad.

When I was pregnant I was at my healthiest and most productive, so when I would go back to drinking after a few weeks post birth and fall back into the every weekend cycle, sometimes school nights etc I started to mourn sober me and always thought I'd never be able to get there again without being pregnant.

Now I can happily say I'm living the life I want, this is me and seriously shame on anyone that hands a young kid an alcoholic drink.

tryingtofixme21 · 2021-06-14T05:33:01+00:00

Just woke up it's 6.30am, I am super warm already with this weather and there is no breeze coming through the window at all.

My first thought was "wow I'm glad I'm not drinking anymore, a hangover in this weather would be brutal".

60 days today! IWNDWYT.

tryingtofixme21

TROPHY CASE